Why does it matter how many people someone has had sex with?

In the world of journalism, that, my friends, is called a question lede. I’m supposed to spend the rest of this article trying to answer that question, but honestly I can’t make any promises. You see, that question has been in my mind for a while now, and I can’t seem to figure it out. Why do people care about someone’s “magic number,” and why is a person’s morality level judged by how many sexual partners they’ve had?

Historically speaking, it’s understandable why chastity and virginity were important. Without any kind of protection, getting pregnant or catching a disease was very much a reality. Virginity was maintained until marriage because no one wanted to catch a disease from their future spouse. Which is fair enough, really.

But those reasons are mainly invalid in modern times; we have condoms to save us from diseased genitals and unwanted fetuses. So long as sex is protected, it really shouldn’t matter how many people have been involved. Sex with multiple partners (not necessarily at the same time…) is often frowned upon as being immoral and looked at as being a “sin of the flesh” – but what is so immoral about it? No one is getting hurt and no one is being damaged. So long as the people involved are consenting and protected, there really is nothing immoral about it. Read More »

Unless you are looking for a few weeks of summer lovin’, relationships eventually get to the point where the issue of God/religion/burning in hell will most likely arise. That is, if religion is important to anyone involved. And if your religions are different? Well, that is cause for some serious talkin’. As much as you want to avoid the topic and live in that dream-world where it doesn’t matter, different beliefs can create some serious problems. So what’s a girl to do when your guy thinks differently about the Big Questions in life, the amount of wives a man should take and just what happens when you don’t pray every day?

Look for common ground.

In today’s modern world, even religious leaders are beginning to emphasize the common ties of religion rather than the differences. It’s important for you to learn to do the same, if you really want to make it work with a guy. If one of you is Protestant and the other Catholic, you’re already halfway there toward reconciliation, really; the fundamental points of doctrine are the same. If you’re interested in religious discussion, make an effort to point out where you agree. For example, Jesus is a prophet and a holy figure in Islam as well as Christianity. Sufis and Buddhists agree that meditation techniques are important for reaching higher spiritual states. Jews and Muslims agree about dietary restrictions and the importance of respecting God through very similar laws. There’s common ground for everyone! Read More »

After growing up in a world where sins absolutely meant Hell and Jesus absolutely meant Heaven, I never want to use the word absolute again. Except to say that I was absolutely mistaken.

I was raised to believe that there was a god, one god, and that Jesus Christ was his son. I accepted him into my ‘heart’ and was baptized at an early age. Then I was taught that anyone who didn’t move forward with those two procedures was going to go to Hell; even if they were a good person. Oh, Hell. The fiery pit where bad people burn with the devil.

I once believed this place was real and I could quote scriptures from The Bible as my own little way of reassuring myself that I wasn’t gonna be one of those bad people going to that bad place. I prayed when things weren’t going my way and I prayed when things were going my way. Come to think of it, I spent more time chatting it up with God when I was young than I did my friends.

I knew nothing about earning money, but I knew you were a selfish person if you didn’t give at least 10% of your income to God and your church. I knew that Halloween was for Satan and witches, that Jewish people believed in the same God that I did but were still going to Hell, and that Pulp Fiction was a very, VERY demonic movie that I was never allowed to see.

When I entered adolescence, I started to embrace my Christianity in new ways. I listened to rock bands who screamed lyrics you couldn’t understand…but they were Christian, so it was okay. I wore punky clothes and was straight edge. A straight edge jerk, judging everyone I knew who did drugs or drank or — god forbid — had sex. Read More »

The Jonas Brothers (one of whom, let’s not kid ourselves, is going to turn out to be gay) are all over the airwaves these days. Disney is pimping these kids out hardcore; giving them their own band, TV movie, and so many endorsements I’m sure they’re already richer than I’ll ever be. Hell, I’m ten years too old for the Disney channel but still know waaayyy more about these nubile young boys (somebody needs to tell their stylist to LAY OFF the foundation. Geeze) than certain cousins in my immediate family.

Speaking of TMI, I already knew the J. Bros wore promise rings. Whether Disney put a (metaphoric) gun to their head, or they really all want to wait until marriage to get it on, I never thought much about the religious implications behind those rings. Yes, certain devout Christian peeps tend to hang onto their V-cards longer than a lot of us, but I never assumed the Jonas Bros were trying to impart any kind of religious message on the impressionable youth of this sugar-pop obsessed country.

I assumed wrong.

At least according to Fox News. Read More »