[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She's been helping people find love for years so we thought we'd tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up!]

I still get a little nostalgic this time of year thinking back to the beginning of my freshman year. Over the first few months Ann (my roommate, bestie and partner in crime) and I dominated in getting to know new people.  Somehow through classes, our brand new social life and dorm we were meeting people left, right and center.  Everyone had a story and was as just excited to meet us as we were to meet them.  Every day was new and had limitless possibilities of friends, fun and dates.

Then something happened.  I am not sure if it was classes or winter kicking in, but we just fell in the rhythm of spending time with who we knew.  Our own little clique. A group of ladies who lived on the same dorm floor with whom who we ate, studied and hung out.  Judgments were made about other people (he’s a jock, she’s a library addict, he’s a science geek, etc) and although we were nice, we jut didn’t step out of our group much.

As college continued it was crazy how those cliques didn’t change much. People were still referred to by their friends, status and even freshman year dorm and floor.  Not until I started a “Kira’s Question o’the Week” for the college newspaper did I realize how far in my comfort zone I had gotten.  The premise of my column was that I would walk around campus and talk to people from all classes and cliques to get their take on a weekly question -  some political, some thought provoking, but mostly fun.  From the minute I was asked I was really excited about using my gregarious powers for good. Read More »

Sometimes, it’s not enough to make your own fab entrance at a Halloween Party; you and your whole crew need to be noticed. On the other hand, sometimes your crazy costume idea is so unique that nobody will get it… unless your faves are by your side to complete the picture. Want to make the biggest splash this Halloween (and have some killer bonding time with your buds as you shop, create, and play dress up)? Here are just a few ideas for some great group costumes. And most of them can be done on a budget!

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Girls are constantly judging other girls.

Girls are terrible to each other.

Girls are each other’s own worst enemies.

But…WHY?

Why is it that guys can be each other’s brothers but girls can’t seem to get it together enough to be each other’s sisters? Why are girls so goddamn catty? Where is the love? Where is the loyalty?

I want answers and I want them now. Yes, I’m being serious. I have questions and I want answers. So, give em to me. Explain the reasoning behind this girl on girl hatred.

1. Why do girls call another girl pretty or skinny with a tone of disgust? You know what I’m talking about. Imagine this sentence being exchanged from one girl to another girl, about a girl passing on the street: “Oh my god…..she is so….skinny…(or, if you prefer, skinnnnayyyyy).” Why the attitude problem? Read More »

Here’s a shocker: BBC News reports that young girls face increasing pressure to become sexualized at younger ages, and besides becoming sluttier and sluttier, they also give into self-destructive habits to cope with social stress.

My first thought? Oh, no! Save the children. My second thought? Ummm, obvi?

When I was young, my role models were Barbie and Kelly Kapowski. Barbie had an impossible waist paired with magic tits, and Kelly Kapowski had cheated on Zack Morris with college boy Jeff, her boss at the Max. Parents today are concerned that the Bratz dolls negatively influence girls’ body images. I think they look like ghetto skanks with big heads, myself. But I suppose if they are inspiring young girls to seek a ghetto-skank look, there is cause for concern.

But I digress. BBC reports that girls are suffering from various social anxieties: two in five girls studied knew someone who had self-harmed; two in five knew someone who had panic attacks; and one in three knew someone with an eating disorder.

These problems suck; I know, I’ve dealt with all of them. I went through a brief bout of anorexia when I was thirteen, dropping to 104 pounds on a 5’7” frame. When I started eating again after an intervention, knives and razors became my friends. Read More »