Since the 5th grade, when I began my dating career and had my first closed-mouth kiss, I have been developing some pretty serious opinions about guys and the things they should and shouldn’t do. From fashion choices to their decisions about personal hygiene, it seems that some members of the male sex are still confused and clueless when it comes to putting themselves together. Below are six common mistakes guys make when trying to bring on the sex appeal that only end up looking, well, really unappealing. Take note, guys.

Chewing/Spitting Tobacco:
In the timeless film “Clueless,” Cher explains that drawing attention to your mouth is the number one way to draw the attention of a member of the opposite sex. I would agree, for the most part, unless we’re talking about chewing tobacco. When I see a guy spit that horrific brown goo into an empty Poland Springs bottle, or pack that junk into his lower lip, I want to vomit. If you must give in to your oral fixation, chew some gum or suck on a lollipop. Turquoise Orbit is my favorite, if you’re interested.

Wife beaters and too-tight muscle T’s:
I totally understand that guys work hard in the gym, grunting and groaning and pumping iron until they are ready to pop a blood vessel, and that they are proud to show their goods off. But wearing regular clothing can be equally revealing. Wife beaters belong at the Jersey Shore, or in bed if you don’t feel like hitting the sheets shirtless. And too-tight muscle T’s are just a recipe for bad sweat stains. Steer clear of both. Read More »

Prominent themes in tonight’s episode of Gossip Girl included “Change of Heart,” “Tumultuous Backstories,” and “Going on Day-Dates in Lingerie.” Damn, I love this show.

Where shall I begin? Let’s start with the bad and work our way up to the “OMG!” Little J and Agnes had a change of heart, which prompted a fight, an attempted betrayal, and a nutso Agnes lighting the J. Humphrey Designs dresses on fire in an alley. Hey, at least Agnes admitted to being crazy.

Meanwhile, (perhaps the biggest 180 of them all) former ice crotch Eleanor Waldorf falling in love (gasp!) with Cyrus, played by Wallace Shawn, a funny looking little man you may recognize from Sex in the City, Clueless or The Princess Bride. Anyway, of course Blair is not pleased, and sets out to destroy the budding romance. Read More »

(We’re back with another weekly installment of G.W.W.E [Guys We Want to Eff]. Ladies, say hello to delicious actor, Paul Rudd. The hunk has been making us laugh till we cry for years on the big screen, so when we’re not deciding between tickling him and cuddling up by his side, he’s certainly tops on our effable list!)

Ask any self-respecting woman what she looks for in a man, and likely among her responses is “the ability to make me laugh.” Look no further than Paul Rudd, the thirtysomething hunk from such smash hits as Anchorman and Knocked Up. When I wasn’t peeing my pants in the theaters, I was drooling over ol’ Paulie. Personality AND looks? Check, check.

And it’s clear I’m not alone.

While he may be known best for his blockbuster roles in Judd Apatow films, he’s also been featured in such landmark comedies as Clueless (duh!) and on television’s Friends as Phoebe’s husband (she was always my favorite Friends chick…so jealous she snagged Paul before the rest of us!). As such, Paul’s effability has been shown to stand the test of time. What could be better than that? (Editor’s Note: effing him, that’s what.)

Mr. Rudd’s new film, Role Models (co-starring the also-scrumptious Sean William Scott) opens today and looks to be his most promising role yet, since there’s nothing more effable than a funny boy who also takes time to hang with kids. You can join me in the movie theater while I fan myself and laugh to death. Or you can stay home with The Great Gatsby and and your Paul Rudd fantasies.

Any takers?

Sometimes, it’s not enough to make your own fab entrance at a Halloween Party; you and your whole crew need to be noticed. On the other hand, sometimes your crazy costume idea is so unique that nobody will get it… unless your faves are by your side to complete the picture. Want to make the biggest splash this Halloween (and have some killer bonding time with your buds as you shop, create, and play dress up)? Here are just a few ideas for some great group costumes. And most of them can be done on a budget!

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As if we weren’t oversharing enough these days, the interwebs have taken it one step further.

Yes, ladies, in addition to showing everyone how well you can shotgun a beer, who you took to that last date party and what you are doing at every. possible. second., now you can tell everyone what you are wearing too!

Weardrobe.com, “your online fashion closet,” is a new site where you can show the world everything in your closet! Because we care! Because I sit at my computer wondering just what some random girl in California (with a much larger budget than me, I might add) is wearing to the beach on Sunday. Because I need to see a collection of photos of girls in giant sunglasses.

The main premise of the site is to “build” your online wardrobe, but I just don’t get it. You are not even building it with real things. It would be one thing to add photographs of the stuff you actually own, but this site just has you choose from random icons to throw in your fake closet. Like Louboutins and Prada slides.

Then, your friends are supposed to help you create an outfit. With icons! WTF? This is like the Sims meets Neiman Marcus. Read More »

Concept: Knife pleats/Issey Miyake

Once upon a time in late 2006, I really needed a job. I hopped on Craigslist, blindly sent out a couple of resumes, sat back and watched the replies roll in. One such interview opportunity came from Soho’s own Pleats Please by Issey Miyake store. Why would anyone want to wear that many pleats?, I asked myself, unable to shake the image of Alicia Silverstone in Clueless from my head. So I never responded. And now I am regretting it. Not only have I discovered how the high-fashion futuristic feel of tiny knife pleats is about as far as one can get from looking like a “Baby One More Time” video reject; I have also learned that the construction of tightly-pleated fabric allows it to stand up and out in a way that wouldn’t otherwise happen with the same material components! Plus, the brand name is polite! Check out how Miyake’s pieces are made!

I know not everything I write about will be wearable or, mostly, affordable, for most college students, or most people. But, if you’re willing to try, there are probably plenty of look-alikes available at your local thrift shop. I just picked up a metallic blue crumpled/pleated dress at The Vintage Thrift Shop in Flatiron and a to-die-for black pleated scarf from Reminiscence in Chelsea. The aforementioned aren’t even wildly-priced designer vintage spots, but mid-to-low-priced stores, devoid of pretentious waif-like salesgirls to boot. SVA students, I hope you’re listening! Read More »

Bust out the Jiffy Pop b*tches, we’re about to take a stroll down memory lane.

Movies aren’t always just entertainment, and though these films seemed like harmless teen flicks at the time, I see clearly now that they’ve truly effected my maturation into adulthood. Plus, they’re awesome.

1. CAN’T HARDLY WAIT

To this day, I still have a girl crush on Jennifer Love Hewitt. I mean, who didn’t want to be her when this move came out? Plus, Ethan Embry = adorable and Lauren Ambrose = truly kick ass. Read More »

Celebdom is full of run-of-the-mill gorgeous people. We all fantasize and have our little lists of who we’d hook up with… but there are some that you just don’t talk about. Those famous people who aren’t exactly of the pre-Angie Brad Pitt reputation.

I have a list of celebrities I find attractive but maybe shouldn’t admit are attractive. These are not the Justin Timberlakes or David Beckhams, but instead, some questionable characters that I (secretly?) feel deserve some consideration:

Chris Brown. He is 18, and therefore I am allowed to judge him. He can dance. And I love that stupid “Kiss, Kiss” song, something I also am a little embarrassed about. I found his stint on the OC rather ambitious. He is kind of adorable.

Jon Stewart. At only 5′7″, he doesn’t meet my usual height requirement. But he’s hilarious. He’s smart. He played soccer at William and Mary. I love him. Read More »

Like me, if you settled into the couch Wednesday night, popcorn in hand, awaiting some supermodel drama, you were probably disappointed to find that America’s Next Top Model was just a recap, devoid of new Tyra-isms, melodramatic judging, and what-will-they-do-next photoshoots.

Hopefully you took the disappointment like a lady, and used the recap episode as an opportunity to make asinine judgments and predictions as to this cycle’s winner. I know I did!

To recap the recap, so far we’ve said tearful goodbyes to clueless but loveable Mila, forgettable Kimberly (who?), snooty Yale priss Victoria, bikini waxer Janet, and ice queen Ebony. I’m still mourning the loss of Janet, who SO deserved to win, and not just because she pretended to give Tyra a bikini wax during the first episode—but alas, I’ve had to name new favorites, predict my new top 3, and of course, speculate as to why each girl will get kicked off.

My completely unscientific yet completely overthought conclusions about the girls still in the running: Read More »

Parties are fun. They’re even more fun when they’re outside. Whether you’re a bonfire enthusiast, a backwoods aficionado, a raging – kegger – at – someone’s – house – where – something – valuable – always – gets – broken frequenter, or a small porch gathering kinda gal, there’s no arguing that summer puts the S (sound) in celebration.

During these warm months, there’s no Public Safety vehicle to worry about, no possibility of getting caught with a cocktail in your dorm room, and no cute guy across the hall to worry about when you wake up the next morning looking and feeling like hell. These summer perks have their downsides, however. Downsides! You say, downsides to complete freedom? Come on, as if! (I’ve decided your inner thoughts sound a lot like Cher in Clueless)

But really, ladies, there are a few things that can put a damper on a sizzling good time. That’s why Summer Do’s and Don’ts is back, freshly coated in SPF 15 and fake tanner, to bring you Summer Do’s and Don’ts: Summer Parties.

Do make sure you know the place and the person who’s throwing this shindig. House parties are much more frequent now, and the amount of people you’ve met in college combined with the amount of people your friends have met usually means you will find yourself at a place that is the very opposite of familiar to you. If you’re going to a friend of a friend’s house or apartment, find out their name and the address of the place. Get your own directions, even if you’re going with people. Be self sufficient and prepared.

Do bring your cell phone. I don’t care if you’d rather not be carrying a purse all night, a cell phone is a must at any and all parties. Especially those parties that take place in the woods or at a stranger’s house.

Don’t put your cell in your back pocket. Phone + back pocket + being tipsy + going pee = phone in the toilet. I’ve lost 2 phones this way (yet never admitted to Verizon why it looks as though the phone has been dunked in water). Learn from my mistake. Read More »