I'm gonna be bald by the time I graduate.

Ok, I know it’s only the middle of the semester – the hump of the term – but I can’t lie … senior year is brutally kicking my ass. As I keep referring to my day-minder to see what is due next or what I need to worry about in the near future (For example, the GRE), I can’t help but think back to sweeter, less busier times such as my first year in college – which I swear feels like it just happened yesterday.

Seniors, doesn’t it feel like just last week were filling out college applications, picking where we would attend, and nervously packing up our rooms and moving into our dorm room for the first time? The last three years have flown by, and this year is no different, except instead of saying to yourself “I have ___ many years left” you hear the fast-paced ticking of the clock letting you know your time is dwindling.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

Well, if you’re like me, you are hearing more than the ticking of the graduation clock. Read More »

After the novelty of college graduation (and all the great gifts that came with it) wore off, I spent a year crying myself to sleep. And I’m not exaggerating. While being done with school after 16 years was pretty liberating, not knowing what was coming next scared the sh*t out of me. And the fact that no one ever warned me how difficult being an adult would be made things a whole lot harder.

I went through a lot that first year – looking for a job, moving to a new city, ending a long relationship, and learning how to care for myself, to name a few – all by myself and now feel that I have the experience and knowledge to advise others on the transition. Because it’s a hard one and every college grad should know that they are not alone. Come back every week for another nugget of information to help you survive in the big, bad world.

The hardest part of graduating college is not the fact that your friends are now spread all over the country. It is not the fact that you can no longer party 6 nights a week with $1 pitchers. It isn’t even the whole “getting a job” thing (even now).

The hardest part is having no freaking clue how to do anything. Read More »

If there’s one thing we all know (but often try to deny), it’s that college is basically it’s own little universe. It’s that beer-drinking, bar-hopping, Cliff Notes-reading, coffee-chugging “safe haven” between the comfort of your parent’s home and that place everybody calls “the real world.” And unfortunately, we all know that “real world” is much less exciting than MTV moguls would lead us to believe.

As a senior, I’ve finally realized one very important thing: College is awesome. And there’s quite a lot of sh*t you can get away with here that just isn’t gonna fly once you graduate. For example:

1. Mid day naps. Unless you decide to hightail your pretty bum down to Mexico or start your own company or something, midday siestas are generally not in the typical workin’ girl schedule. Oh, how I love the five hour breaks in between my classes.

2. Threesomes. Unless you want to end up like Charlotte in SATC, watching your dude getting’ frisky and feelin’ up some rando-girl while you stand awkwardly on the sidelines, I think threesomes are definitely better explored pre-graduation. I think almost everybody has at least one wild hookup story (that may or may not involve multiple partners) by the time they leave college. And that’s where those kind of explorations should probably stay. In college.

3. All nighters and Adderall binges. I’m pretty sure it’s not “adultlike” to stay up all night, downing cups of coffee and caffeine pills (or whatever your all-nighter drug of choice may be) to finish whatever crazy task your boss asks of you. Purple bruise-like bags under your eyes will never be sexy. Especially for an early morning meeting. Read More »

I, too, will probably be this drunk at commencement.

I’ve lost track of the days and I no longer can distinguish between night and day. We drink round the clock now anyways so there doesn’t seem to be a reason for me to try to figure any of this out. But there are still a few things that I must get done before doomsday (known to my parents as commencement ceremonies).

TRY ON MY CAP AND GOWN
I thought it would be hilarious and trendsetting if I got a 4′11 gown for my 5′7 self. There’s a strong chance I will regret that decision when I’m the only one crossing the stage with bare legs. There’s a stronger chance that my family will be embarrassed. And there’s the strongest chance that cutting the top in a v-neck (they’re very in right now) will look more Salvation Army than American Apparel.

THROW EVERYTHING OUT
I have problems throwing things out. Especially if I got it for free. Because of this issue of mine (un-webmd-able…I’ve looked) I have quite the collection of heinously ugly Syracuse water bottles, fairy wings, and soy sauce packets. I never even once dreamed of dressing up like a fairy, but because I found the wings laying on a street on a rainy Halloween circa 2007 I kept them. I don’t know what I planned to do with them over the past three years, but I kept telling myself you never know when you might need them. Turns out I never did.

Read More »

I remember my college graduation like it was yesterday. After a group of my friends threw an open bar graduation party for family and friends the night before, I woke up graduation morning hungover, naked and confused about  my whereabouts. I rolled over to find myself lying next to the first college friend I made at orientation.

“Fitting,” I thought to myself. Then I grabbed my clothes (all but one shoe…which I told myself I could live without) and ran out the door. If I didn’t get home soon, I would be late for graduation.

I hailed a cab on the corner of the street and hopped in. On the short ride back to my house, I passed families all dressed up for the great moment that was their son/daughter/grandchild/cousin/brother/sister’s graduation. I looked down at the clothes I wore the night before and the unidentified scars that can only come from a night of heavy drinking on someone else’s tab.

“Fitting,” I thought to myself again. Read More »

There are a few normal things to do after you graduate:

1. Get a job.
2. Go to grad school.
3. Live at home and freak out about the future.

I don’t know about you, but none of these options sound very appealing to me. I prefer an option that is a bit outside the norm: travel.

That’s right. If you’re graduating, I’m here to convince you to put off getting a job and spend at least three weeks (and preferably more) in a new place or country. I went to India for five weeks right after I finished my post-grad fellowship, and it was one of the most amazing trips I’ve ever taken.

There are always reasons not to travel. It costs too much. It’s impossible to get that much time off. Your best friend won’t go with you. But those aren’t good reasons, and there are definitely ways around them all. If major post-grad travel is cost-prohibitive for you, consider doing a volunteer program in another country that will cover the costs of your airfare and lodging (surprisingly common).

If you already work a job and don’t have high hopes for getting time off, sit down and have an honest talk with your supervisor. If you seriously want to travel, your enthusiasm will come through, and as long as your supervisor isn’t a jerk, he or she should be willing to work with you to figure out how you can do it. Read More »

It was the second to last weekend of college. Lawns were packed by day and the bars were crowded at night. Therefore it makes sense that it was the weekend that I contracted a deadly disgusting eye infection that prevented me from socializing properly. I won’t go into details, but it wasn’t pretty. But the worst part wasn’t my eyes, it was the fact that I couldn’t wear contacts for five whole days.

I wear my glasses so rarely at college that my roommate didn’t believe that I was telling the truth about even wearing contacts. They bring back memories of braces, awkwardness, and greasy hair so I try to avoid them at all costs. Even when I’ve had eye issues before I’ve gone the one-contact-contract-a-headache route rather than wear glasses. But this time I didn’t have a choice; it was either my permanent eyesight or glasses in public. I debated for a few minutes and had a short and pleasant daydream about life with two glass eyes. Read More »

This past Sunday was by far the most stressful night of my entire life. Not only was Desperate Housewives new for the first time in months, but Melissa Joan Hart’s movie was premiering and the Natalie Holloway story was airing. Now I’m not a mathematician or even a biochemical engineer, so figuring out how to schedule all these things onto my DVR within the same two hour period was quite the challenge. But after a half hour of concentration (and realizing MJH’s movie My Fake Fiance runs back-to-back for four days) I figured it out.

I  had assumed that I would watch the Natalie Holloway movie and My Fake Fiance in private while my roommates were at class so I wouldn’t have to hear them make fun of me for days on end (I’ve spent the entire year pretending not to know that we have Lifetime Movie Network). But then someone threw a joking reference out about My Fake Fiance and I latched on. It’s not that either of us thought it would be anywhere near good, but we both knew that it was going to be so bad that it would be hilarious. And then, like a gift from heaven, another friend wanted to watch the Natalie Holloway story. And before I knew it, there were 5.5 (the .5 is for the neighbor that got stuck watching but didn’t appreciate it for the art that it was) of us sitting around watching this marathon of horrible-yet-addicting TV. Read More »

I’ve always appreciated the phrase “no offense but (insert ANYTHING!)” for it’s ability to take away all offense to the next part of the statement. I went through about a thirteen year phrase where I truly believed that saying “no offense, but” before I said the most heinous thing possible would make it impossible for the person to be mad at me.

Needless to say I lost a few (all) friends over this phase.

As the time starts to tick down at school I’m not only getting increasingly nostalgic (remember that hilarious time I fell on the ice and broke my tailbone!??!) but also increasingly eager to dole out some honesty before certain people go out to the real world. Hence I started the first official Honesty Month at Syracuse. It’s an entire month of “no offense but.” I know, fabulous idea right? Read More »

I’ve started preparing for my post graduation depression/emo stage. I’ve bought the tissue boxes and I’ve prepared the soundtrack (Seasons of Love on repeat). But I also made a proactive step of creating a list of things that I know I absolutely won’t miss- that way when I’m putting on my fifth layer of black eyeliner and tattooing tears on my face I’ll remember that there were some bad things about college.

STUDYING

I always start my studying with a lot of energy and excitement. I have blank flashcards stacked next to fresh pens and my unwrapped books. I put on my fake glasses and start poring over the material faster than I can highlight. Three minutes into this invigorating “studying” process I’m bored. I only have two more tests left and then I will never ever have to study ever again. Never again will I have to eat breakfast, check my e-mail, and simultaneously flip flashcards and mumble answers to myself. Read More »