It’s Monday. I am out of clean clothes, but I’m also out of quarters, meaning I’m wearing a bathing suit bottom for underwear. And it keeps giving me a wedgie. I ate a piece of cheese and applesauce for lunch because my fridge is empty. The weather has turned cold, the sky is gray and Speidi has a new book out. And I am 4 very long days away from the weekend.

Yeah, my day has been pretty damn sucky.

But then I found this video over at CollegeHumor.com (yeah, it’s all part of the job, people) and it made everything better. No joke, I’ve watched this thing 11 times. It’s like a DQ Tagalong Blizzard for your soul. Only it’s free, doesn’t require you to leave the house, and won’t make you fat. And it’s got a dog. Read More »

Um, are Rihanna and Chris Brown married?!

Harry Potter actor killed. Killer finally convicted.

Madonna is not a Britney fan.

10 essential beauty products.

A Spring Break breadown.

Haagen Dazs’ latest ice cream innovation.

Why do people still care about Mischa Barton?

OMFG. Is the high heeled sneaker back?!

Spotted: Georgina back on the UES.

A whitening toothpaste that actually works.

The Jonas Brothers are shirtless!!!!!! (Excitement enhanced.)

Supporting McCain will kill your love life.

Unfortunately, not the same happy ending we saw on the Hudson.

It’s an Idol party!

People wonder about Rihanna’s eye patch.

How about some special cupcakes to celebrate Friday the 13th?

10 tips for beauty on a budget.

Drew Barrymore and Hugh Grant? Is she ever single?

Who will get the Olympics in 2016?

Making important changes on campus.

Bra-art for breast cancer.

If I were a bro.

Oh no. K-Fed is back in the recording studio. Maybe he should do a duet with Heidi? That has “Grammy” written all over it.

Girl selling virginity wants to help the world.

Check out K-Fed’s new lady.

Sasha Fierce has nothing on this girl.

CollegeHumor is getting their own MTV show!

Women would rather live without sex than internet?

5 magazines that may not make it through ’09.

The best lip color on the cheap.

Keanu Reeves thinks he’s perfect. Do you agree?

Stars of the 90′s – who’s still hot?

Treat that post exam trauma.

What should you wear for NYE?

Is fashion week <shudder> cancelled?

If you are reading this it means that you are still alive. Congrats on surviving another (or your first!) Welcome Week! Don’t worry; those bruises will be long gone by Parent Weekend.

It’s been a great week and we at CC Headquarters have been quite busy while all of you lucky ladies are out enjoying your last week of freedom. After all, who else was going to guide the young, innocent incoming freshmen?

Without us, they never would have known how to deal with difficult roommates, how to tell if a prof was good, how to break the ice with strangers, how to cook when all they have is a mini fridge and hotpot, what to wear to the first day of class, how to handle all the weirdness of college, and the rest of the shiz that makes up college life.

And if we were out getting our drink on, who would have taught you all you need to know about condoms? Or why you maybe shouldn’t have drunk sex?

We are like guardian angels over here. Where are our wings, damnit?

It’s amazing we even had time to catch the Democratic National Convention, or find out who McCain chose as his VP.

And now it’s over, along with our sweet, sweet summer.

Have a great Labor Day Weekend!

Everyone has that one thing they cannot stand in the opposite sex. It may not be rational (“His jeans are always an inch too short!”), but that doesn’t matter; we can’t help what turns us on (nibbling on my ear…mmmmmm) and off (man necklaces).

This week we asked our writers what made them cringe. (And, yes, everyone agreed that small undies/lots of guns/long hair/ and multiple guitars all lying out on a tarp is pretty effing gross.) Guys, if you are reading this, take note. For real.

Melanie – Northeastern University: I hate cocky attitudes with a tee shirt to match, like, “got your tickets to the gun show?” No thank you!

J – NYU: The way guys’ dirty socks smell. I swear. It could be a terrorist weapon.

Jennifer: I know it’s stupid, but honestly… bad grammar. Maybe it’s just the writer coming out in me, but people who use proper grammar sound intelligent… and I’m a sucker for boys with brains!

Suzie – George Washington University: I feel horrible for being so superficial but I cannot deal with man boobs. They freak me out like… like… *silent scream*

Conan – Columbia College: Smoking. Or fake laughter. Read More »

It’s Barack O’MANIA!!

George Clooney’s inner dialogue

You know, sometimes I wonder what Amy Winehouse’s thoughts would sound like

Living Lohan preview. ‘Nough said.

SO. READY. FOR. INDIANA JONES.

Celebrity couples update: because I’m totally alone

Beer Pong 2.0–Gawker vs. CollegeHumor vs Facebook

I love everything that Richard Simmons stands for

Protect your banana–and tell your boyfriend to do the same!

Okay, okay, I may be a bit biased on this topic, due to my heartbreak three years ago at the end of my freshman year of college. But every year around this time, I get a little nostalgic about this issue.

All of my first year, I dated a boy from high school who went to college 14 hours away from me, and we somehow managed to make it through the whole year with visits, emails, and a hefty phone bill. I could not wait to get home for the summer and live in the same town again. But, upon returning, it was evident that things were different between us and he broke up with me. I was devastated and could not understand why this had happened. What did I do wrong?

The thing that I wish someone had told me originally is that, in college, people CHANGE, in some way or another, no matter what. And that’s not always a bad thing! I know I have grown into who I am over these four years and feel confident in what I want to do with my life and how I will get there.

Read More »