[Life isn’t black and white. As much as we wish we simply loved or hated things, there is often that whole annoying gray area in the middle. Like, we love going home to the parentals', but we hate having to live with their rules. Or we love power hours, but hate cleaning up the empty cans in the morning. Damn you, gray area; you make decision-making that much more complicated!]

I live in my Rainbows. Period. No matter if it’s spring or fall, cloudy or sunny, hot or cold. No matter if I’m heading to a class, rocking out at a concert, or lounging by the pool. My Rainbows are constantly my go-to shoe, but sometimes – I admit – they’re just not a very good shoe choice.

So, my dear Rainbows, I’m totally torn…

Love Em:

There’s many reasons why 99% of the time you see me (and the majority of the other girls on campus), I’m in my Rainbows. They’re arguably the most comfortable shoes ever made, thanks to the leather construction and cushioned sole that molds to your feet (you can even see the layers of leathery softness!). And if you want more comfort, you can even buy ‘em double-layered! Can you say “heaven”?

Rainbows come in a ton of varieties. You can choose your color (white, brown, or black), material (leather or cloth), and straps (thin or thick). Not that it matters; whatever you choose, Rainbows always match your outfit and make you look 100% Cali-cute! Read More »

[This post is courtesy of our gal pal, Marie Claire.]

Sometimes good sex feels like a really tough recipe to me. Now, I love cooking; any good cook knows he/she is only as good as the ingredients they use. This is why I love the process of buying vegetables and other ingredients. I even love peeling and cutting. It’s all part of the process to make a great dish.

And, like a recipe, I think sex is only as good as its ingredients: the people involved, and then the deeper ingredients like connection and chemistry. Here are some ingredients that can help make great sex:

Safe, but threatening

Couples need to feel safe around each other, but sex is fun when it has a bad edge to it. If you can make one another feel “comfortably threatened” it can lead to a steamy experience.

Spontaneity

Spontaneity is a common thread for success in all areas of romance, and sex is no different. Sex, just like anything else, can become routine and mundane. How often do we just grab each other and go at it?

Attraction

I’m not one of those lucky guys that has sex with girls who aren’t attracted to me. Some of my friends admit that they’ve had sex with people they were not attracted to. How do these guys pull this off? I need to learn this secret. Nevertheless, none of my friends are ever thrilled about it, so the sex wasn’t that great. Read More »

Pop quiz! Who makes the ugliest shoes on Earth?Ask anyone this question and they’ll give you one of two answers. Uggs. Or Crocs.

Now, I will happily argue to my death that Uggs are not that ugly and I will continue to wear them despite what anyone says. But Crocs? Disgusting rubber, brightly colored Crocs? I wouldn’t even be caught dead in them. After all, when I think of the average Crocs-wearer, I think of grubby little kids wearing orange shirts with bright yellow Crocs (always clashing) with those stupid little charms stuck in the holes. Or their plain un-stylish parents.

Do I fall into one of those categories? I think not. Read More »

Phone sex. One of those taboos that’s so great, people are willing to pay $5.99 a minute just to get some. Of course, if you’re in a relationship, you can get it for free. But you haven’t, have you? Sure, phone sex might seem awkward at first, but under certain circusmtances, it can satisfy the carnal needs of you and your partner.What’s the big deal with phone sex, you ask. I mean, sure, I prefer a quality hump to a Cingular-shag, but sometimes, you’re horny and physical contact isn’t an option.

I lost my phone sex virginity when I was in a long-distance relationship. Actually, we were having phone sex long before we had actual intercourse, because my track record was a lot longer than my man’s and I was trying to be a “good girl” and take things slow, or some bullsh*t like that.

Anyway, you know all the fluff and butterflies that come when you have a new crush, or even better, a new boyfriend. I was really into this guy. I wanted him. Bad. But I was buried with school work, and wouldn’t be able to visit him for a week or two. One night, I called him, half in the bag and 100% horny. Obviously, the alcohol lowered my inhibitions, and I started talking dirty, telling him how much I wanted him…and the next thing I knew, BAM! Phone sex. Read More »

[For many of us, sex and college go together like Uggs and snow - you can’t have one without the other. So, we brought in one of Berkeley’s finest sex columnists, Elizabeth, to start a dialogue about the topic (and act) that is very near and dear to our hearts. Every Thursday she will get your day goin’ with a little somethin’ somethin’ that’s on her mind.]

Nina Hartley is an extremely successful adult film star with 650 different video appearances under her belt. Starting off as an exotic dancer in the ‘80s, she is now a published author and an award winning actress for both sexual and non-sexual roles. I met Nina when we both served on a panel about modern sexuality for the Commonwealth Club in San Francisco. I asked her to give me some of her wise wisdom about sex, relationships, and everything in between.

Me: Do you think sexual freedom (through porn, sex outside of relationships, etc.) is good for the advancement women, or detrimental to the advancement of their self esteem?

Nina: Sexual freedom and autonomy are vital components of women’s greater equality in society. We are adults, not children in need of protection. Whether or not a woman’s exercise of this freedom is good or bad for her depends upon her making choices that are consistent with her values and beliefs. When we do things that go against our understanding of ourselves and the world, bad things usually happen as a result. My choices wouldn’t be good ones for very many women, nor would their choices be good for me.

M: We all know the key to being sexy is confidence. Do you have any special advice for being, or even just appearing, confident? Perhaps something you picked up through the industry? Read More »

Look through my phonebook. The list is never-ending. Dan. Paul. Rick. Mike. Javier. Alex. Nicolas. Nicolas #2. Cedric. Brandon. And so on. Not to brag, but I’m something of a certified P-I-M-P. Poppin’ the collar all over the place. And brushing my shoulders off.

I wouldn’t put myself on player status, because that’s not what it’s about. No one actually gets ahead by playing games. Games are childish. People do actually get ahead by meeting new people, and being able to go for what they want.

Like that guy. The incredibly sexy one across the room. Dark hair falling in his very green eyes. And a crowd around him that’s ten chicks deep.

The Strategy? Don’t pay him too much attention.

It works every time; if he really is that hot, he knows it. And if he didn’t know it, the girls throwing themselves at him will have been a good wakeup call. So why not switch The Game up on him? You’re cute. You’re fun. And you are the one chick he can’t just wrap around his finger. Or at least you’re pretending like you are.

I’m not talking about your middle school cold-shoulder tactics. The point is simply not to let this guy know that inside you’re going googly-eyed. Usually, one firm, flirty look is all you need. Then continue with your evening. Laugh with your girlfriends. Look stupid on the dance floor. Do whatever it is that you would normally do if dreamboat weren’t standing over there in the corner.

About halfway through the night, you might want to give dreamboat a reminder that you’re still there and pointedly walk past him, and then maybe go order a drink by yourself, so that he doesn’t have to awkwardly say something to you in front of all your drooling girlfriends. Read More »

I went out with a guy once. On our first date we went to dinner, and things were going so well that when he took me home I invited him in.

At which point he asked me if he could borrow a book while he “dealt with all the dairy” he had just eaten.

True story. And it ended right there; I never called him again.

I have no problem with talking about farts and poop, but I do have a problem doing so on date #1. I just don’t understand why guys feel the need to bring up the bowels when we haven’t even locked lips yet. And then there is the whole double standard; why can he fart in the car and lock the windows but I can’t even mention the fact that I poop without him cringing and curling up in the fetal position?

I asked my guy friends to break it all down for me – apparently farting is a sign of endearment. Read on… Read More »

I. Love. Plaid.

I don’t know what it is about that winsome pattern, but I can’t get enough.

I suspect it has something to do with the years I spent looking at fashion magazines with my mother. Every September, from the time I was 11 until I was 17, my mom would come home with a copy of the Seventeen: Back To School issue. And we devoured that sh*t.

And for some reason, every September without fail, that magazine would be busting at the seams with plaid. Plaid dresses, plaid shirts, plaid fricking socks–is plaid in every fall? The answer, my friends, is yes.

I don’t read Seventeen’s Back to School issue anymore (although my mother still does), but plaid don’t fade and neither do my love.

So here, for your viewing pleasure, is the creme of the crop of this season’s fall plaids. Pair with otherwise simple pieces, a smile, and a nostalgia that time will never defeat. Ahhhh. Plaid. Read More »

There are famous scenes from movies depicting it. There are Facebook bumper stickers dedicated to it. There are songs that shout the praises of it. There are how to articles and, hell, it even has search results on Wikipedia. Yet for the entirety of my life, the closest I’d come to Sex on the Beach was double fisting them on Friday nights. This had to change.

With the advent of summer upon us, I decided it was high time I was no longer a sex on the beach virgin. I grabbed my manfriend (chuckle chuckle, Carrie Bradshaw) and headed to the shore.

It was a perfect night for just being at the beach, let alone hooking up. Full moon, light breeze and crashing waves. Very romance novel. So boyfriend and I wandered along the beach until we found a secluded(ish) spot.

When we got there, however, I found that I could have done with some good advice before embarking on this adventure. So for all you beach bunny virgins out there contemplating some sea-side action, here is what I wish my experienced girlfriends had told me:

Bring a Flashlight: Luckily for us, the moon was enormous and lit our way pretty well. I happen to be completely blind in the smallest amount of darkness, though, and was petrified of stepping on baby sea turtles. If it’s even semi-cloudy out, a small light should help you navigate. Read More »