Boys can effectively come between the best of friends causing mass fallout, so what happens when the guy gripe occurs between roommates? So the roomie brings dudes back with increasing regularity come the chillier months. You go to sleep to the sounds of their man grunts. You wake up to see their boxers on your floor. One even asked to borrow your toothpaste! Come on!!

Your room, which should be a safe zone of zen goodness, has suddenly become something between a Motel 6 and a full-on brothel. Clearly you’re not cool with this new situation and the roommate (that bitch!) needs to know! So what’s a gal to do? Ask Marysa, that’s what. See what she has to say below… Read More »

Your best friend totally stabbed you in the back…again. You don’t even know why you are friends with her anymore. Ok, so she is really fun to go out with and is the best person to lay in bed and watch a movie with, but the back stabbing and sh*t-talking has got to stop.

What a bitch. Seriously, the next time you see her you are going to open a major can of whoop ass and tell her everything that is on your mind: she’s a crappy friend, you can’t trust her, and those jeans you told her you liked? Yeah, they make her look FAT!

You sit in your room waiting for her to come home, stewing. Each passing minute brings out more and more anger, and you think of more things you can’t wait to say to her. You have never been this angry. You are afraid she is going to cry. You have been waiting to say these things for a long time and there is no telling how it is all going to go down.

You hear her come home. She drops her things and comes and finds you in your room.

“Hey!” She says, in that annoyingly chipper tone.

“Hey,” you reply.

“What’s up?”

“Nothin’, just studying. How was your day?” So, you chicken out. She just looks so normal and happy and you don’t know how to verbally bitch slap someone to her face. You know she doesn’t mean to be a bad friend, and you feel bad unleashing all that anger on her. And having to watch her reaction. Read More »

[Everyone’s got a vice, a bad habit, something they know they need to change. Unfortunately, everyone also has a million excuses why they just can’t do it. Not anymore. Every month we will be following a different CollegeCandy writer as she takes on a personal challenge. This month we're following Jill as she gets out of that boring box of hers and starts facing some fears. First she killed a spider. Then she sang some karaoke. And this week, she confronts authority.]

Ever since I was little, I have had a hard time communicating with authority. So much so, that in 4th grade, when I did my worksheet and left it at home, I stole, YES stole, my desk partner’s worksheet (who I also happened to have a MAJOR 4th-grade style crush on) when he got up to go to the bathroom, erased his name and wrote mine in and handed it in before he got back; a story that to this day I cite as one of the worst things I’ve ever done. (When he searched around in disbelief for his worksheet, asking me if I knew where it went, I twirled my hair saying in a high pitch voice, “I have no idea, Eli!” while trying to flutter my eyelashes and not look guilty. Gulp.)

If I was missing a dance class, I was scared to tell my teacher and tears would well up in my eyes as I tried to explain to her why I wasn’t able to come. When I met with a TA in college over a bad test grade (in a class called Human Sexuality. Tear.), I burst out crying in her chair.

The point being, for some reason, I have a fear about confronting people who are my authority. I don’t know why, but even now, a quarter century on this planet later, I can talk to my peers about what they’re doing wrong or tell my friend something that’s really bothering me, but I can’t tell my boss that I feel sick and need to go home without getting misty eyed.

Until now! Read More »

A big part of etiquette is knowing how to deal with rude people with dignity and grace.

Let’s face it, you can mind your manners all you want but there’ll always be that jerk that comes along and pushes you off the swing set anyway *cough-Ryan-M-from-first-grade-cough* So here are some quick guidelines of how to deal with the Ryans of this world:

During a confrontation…

1. Ask yourself if it’s really worth it.
If someone’s walking straight at you and expect you to get out of their way, remember that it wouldn’t kill you to move over. Yeah, it’s a pain in the butt and yeah, that person is completely rude, but is it worth ruining your day over?

2. Stay calm under pressure.
As Miss Manners, I really can’t condone rudeness; however, I do understand that everyone has bad days and sometimes people honestly don’t know that they’re being rude. So if you catch an attitude at the get-go, they might see it as you being rude first. Never fight fire with fire. No matter what, speak calmly and rationally and perhaps they’ll realize how ridiculous they sound in comparison.
DO NOT: Act patronizing. If your calmness comes off as patronizing/douche-y, that’ll only set them off again. No one likes to feel stupid and you’ll just push their buttons if they feel like you’re looking down on them.
OR: Start a shouting match, especially in public. Then both of you are being rude. Plus it’s hard to be rational when you’re screaming/being screamed at. Read More »

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you. So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

Your best friend totally stabbed you in the back…again. You don’t even know why you are friends with her anymore. Ok, so she is really fun to go out with and is the best person to lay in bed and watch a movie with, but the back stabbing and sh*t-talking has got to stop.

What a bitch. Seriously, the next time you see her you are going to open a major can of whoop ass and tell her everything that is on your mind: she’s a crappy friend, you can’t trust her, and those jeans you told her

you liked? Yeah, they make her look FAT!

You sit in your room waiting for her to come home, stewing. Each passing minute brings out more and more anger, and you think of more things you can’t wait to say to her. You have never been this angry. You are afraid she is going to cry. You have been waiting to say these things for a long time and there is no telling how it is all going to go down. Read More »

To put it plainly, my first college roommate was a megabitch. Sharon* (named changed to protect the dreadful) and I never spoke. Our room was silent and filled with angst. I would try to start conversations on topics I knew she enjoyed (dance, The Bachelor, being the biggest jerk ever) but she would usually respond with one word answers or with exaggerated sighs.

The worst part? Sharon was super fun and nice with every other person on our floor but for some reason couldn’t stand me.

I made myself scarce and tried not to be in the room when she was. I hid out in the dorm lounge and the cafeteria. Meanwhile, Sharon did the opposite and made my life a living hell.

The final straw came the night she came home drunk at 2 AM before my first big test. She shushed her gentleman friend loudly as they stumbled into our room, then she dragged the poor shlub up onto the top bunk of our bed for what had to be the most awkward dorm sex ever. I told myself that night that I would try to find a new roommate. Sharon must have heard my prayers because a few weeks later she asked ME to move out so she could live with her best friend. I didn’t even feel like arguing or complaining. I just said sure and amazingly enough moved into the open room right across the hall.

Since then, I’ve had some great and not so great living situations, but none of them taught me as much as my first semester at college. Here are a few tips for those of you taking the plunge into dorm life. Read More »

A few weeks back, I shared a story involving me, my boyfriend and one crazy bitch. The girl refused to leave my boyfriend alone and I thought that having my boyfriend tell her to back off, then me, very forcefully, telling her to back off, would’ve been enough. Not so, people.

She didn’t get the not-so-subtle hint.

This biotch, who I’ve dubbed “Rachel” has struck again and this time, I am unsure of my next move. If telling someone to leave you alone doesn’t do the trick, what will?!

So, I am enlisting the help of my fellow CC-ers to steer me in the right direction. Below are some plans of action that I am considering. I need your unbiased opinions to help me make the right next move and get rid this crazy girl once and for all.

I could confront her, again. This time, face to face, in public, so she has no way of hiding behind her phone or computer and her naïve little, “I’m too good for everyone” façade will be shattered into a million little pieces. Read More »

I spend about 10 hours a day online at work. When I finally dislodge my ass from the chair and head home for the evening, I check my email on my phone while stuck in traffic, or sitting at red lights. When I get home, I power up my laptop and settle in for an evening with my trusty friend, Mr. Internet.

I talk to my friends online. I shop online. I work online. I date online. I stalk online.

My life revolves around the computer and it’s starting to show.

Since I started using AOL in second grade, my social life has moved from the actual world into the World Wide Web. The internet makes it all so easy! Like talking to my friends in other countries or, more central to my life, confronting people and bitching them out when they piss me off.

You know you’ve been there; you have so many things you want to say to someone (like, I don’t know…an ex?) but pussy out when you try to talk to them in person. So, you bring it all up on AIM. And the shit starts flying. You lay it all on the table, turn away from the screen as you click “send” and wait for AIM to tell you if they are typing a response. (Bonus points if you also tune into some really awesome angry/tear jerker songs to set the mood.) Read More »

A lot of people have told me that they are eternally grateful to be on my good side. It seems that I can be quite a biatch if I don’t like you, someone you hang out with, or something you said or did in the past. Or if you are wearing something ugly and unflattering. Or if you mess with one of my friends. Or if I’m drunk and feeling rather confrontational. Or…well, the possibilities are endless.

The weird thing is that while I have absolutely no problem standing my ground and being a total bitch in certain situations, I am actually petrified of confrontation. Even in the most minor of cases. Like when I was at American Apparel the other day; I tried on fifteen things and decided I didn’t want any of them. But instead of telling the hipster sales dude that, I told him I would have to run to my car to grab my wallet. And I never returned.

If I can’t even give the dude at American Apparel “bad news,” imagine how bad I am with things that really matter. Like breaking things off with people.

If I hookup/go on a date with someone and don’t really feel anything (like, I don’t know…an orgasm?) I ignore their calls and emails until they get the point. If I’m feeling guilty or the guy is just not getting the hints, I will break the news in a text or email. Read More »

When it comes to ending a relationship gone bad, there’s a right way to make the break (and it doesn’t involve leaving an “It’s over, I’m sorry” note for your significant other to discover under her door or in her inbox). In “Signs It’s Time to Break Up with Her” you learned when the break-up is inevitable, it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to do the actual breaking-up. Instead of procrastinating, we have a few ideas to guide you through this unpleasant confrontation.

1. Tell her first

Don’t let her find out you want to break up with her from her cousin who knows a girl who overheard a guy who talked your dad who thinks he heard from your best friend. You obviously care somewhat about this girl if she is your girlfriend. So, out of respect for her, it’s only right that she be the first to know about it.

2. End it face-to-face

Be a man. Don’t call her, text her or email her this kind of news. She will probably want to talk to you after you break it to her and there is no other way to have a serious conversation with her unless you do it in person. Read More »