I think too much.  And when it comes to turning over the sheets, my mind goes into over-drive.  In fact, I have been known to ruin an entire sexual experience by thinking too much about the position I’m in – my physical movements, how big my thighs look, trying to read his thoughts like an Edward Cullen girl hybrid.

I’ve been looking for a cure for my problem for months.  Why can’t I just relax, sit back, and enjoy? What can I possibly do to block the free-flowing thoughts and get into the moment?  I know there is nothing emotionally wrong with me; I’m a normal girl and just like every other girl out there, my mind is riddled with thoughts.  Mine just happen to reproduce like a cluster of horny bunny rabbits whenever I get nakie and start doing the nasty.

Luckily, there is always a solution to my problems!  And this time, altering my mind may have a little something to do in altering my position.

A little back story:
While hiding from the Black Friday crowds in an empty bookstore last week, a certain title caught my eye. And that title was “Spectacular Sex Moves He’ll Never Forget.” I ducked down in the aisle and began flipping through, intrigued by the yoga-turned-sex moves I discovered. That night, fueled by some leftover wine, my boyfriend and I tried one out. And it was a night neither of us will soon forget.

Since then, we’ve been toying around with many fun and interesting new sex positions (which I’m sure will be even more fun when we’re no longer crashing in my parents’ basement) and I have to say, my sex life will never be the same. If you’re like me and tend to stick with the more traditional approach to sex (“I lie, you do all the work”), take it from me: it’s time to crack a book and get a little more adventurous between the sheets.

Why? I’m glad you asked. Read More »

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My mother (yes, my mother) once told me that if there aren’t fireworks between the sheets, it’s just not meant to be.  I immediately dismissed this advice, partly because it meant my menopausal mother was having better sex with my overweight father than I was with my supposedly sexually prime bedmate. But mostly, I rejected this theory because I didn’t, and still don’t, think its entirely true.

Sex – the good, the bad, and the ugly – where does it all fit in?

We make such a big deal about sex. It consumes us.  We lie about sex – we say we’re having less when we’re having more, and more when we’re having less. We worry about our relationship if the sex isn’t “above average.” We worry about our health, our sanity, our bodies and our worth if he simply rolls over. We use sex as a barometer for the status of our relationships when there couldn’t possibly be a less reliable, standardized or empirical indicator.

I, for one, do not believe that the caliber or frequency of the sex we’re having – or not having – is necessarily an accurate representation of what lies beneath. Now this is not to say that sex is not an important component of a relationship, because it is.  I fancy a good ole shag just as much as the next gal. What I am saying, though, is that thanks to soft core porn, (aka cable television), Megan Fox, and Cosmopolitan articles with titles like “Give Him the Best Sex of His Life” and “101 Sex Positions to Try Before You Die,” we have been made to believe that not only should we be having sex every night, but great sex every night, and this just isn’t realistic. Read More »

9 things you shouldn’t say to a guy.

Some celebrity designers know what they’re doing.

Obviously, this would be Heidi Montag’s next step.

Say it with me: awwwwwwwwwww.

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Paris Hilton’s got beef with Kimmy K.

[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She's been helping people find love for years so we thought we'd tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up, ladies.]

Something happens from the time when we are kids to adults.  We learn that if we want to be successful at a career, buy a house, save for retirement or achieve any major milestone in life we have to work for it.  Yet, when I talk to people about finding “the one,” they want it to happen naturally. Organically. They will “know it when they see it.”

I don’t want to burst any bubbles, but no one is entitled to happiness.  Nor is anyone entitled to a wonderful relationship.  People have to work for it just like their careers or any of the other relationships in our lives like friendships or family.  When you feel you are entitled to something you stop working for it and sit around and wait for it to happen for you.

The good news is everyone can have a healthy and balanced relationship; the hard news is that you have to work for it just like other areas of your life. You’ll have to take chances, step outside your comfort zone, explore, open up and go against your natural human instinct to wait for the movie moment.  Want to stack the odds in your favor?  Do the homework.  Figure out where you are, who is a good match for you and be aware of how you are presenting yourself.

Here are a few other common dating myths you need to consider. Read More »

You know that scene in Get Him To The Greek when Aaron’s girlfriend says something to the effect of, “Omg I can’t wait to watch like 100 hours of Gossip Girl”? I laughed hysterically (It’s funny cuz it’s true!). David did not (for the same reason).

I don’t know about you guys, but when I get home after a long day of interning, working, and gymming, all I want to do is eat dinner and zone out to one of the thousands of Real Housewives or Say Yes to the Dress episodes I have DVR’ed. Unfortunately, my live-in boyfriend isn’t on the same page. Especially now that it’s baseball season.

Without our usual primetime lineup to veg out to (If you’re an avid CC reader you’ll know about my unerring obsession with Comedy Night Done Right), the pickings have been slim for couple-friendly shows.

Until Now. Enter this summer’s surefire couple-pleasing shows. Read on, DVR and get some popcorn ready. Read More »

We are NOT these people!

A few weeks ago, one of mine and Matt’sclose friends moved out of town to go live back home. And we’ve recently found out that she’s been coming back to town on weekends without telling us. We were worried for a bit, wondering if she was mad at us and what we could have done to cause it. Well, our worst fears were confirmed. Her best friend told us that she doesn’t tell us when she’s coming back to Austin because we’ve become THAT couple.

You know who that couple is. The two people that none of their friends want to hang out with; the ones that everyone assumes are different and don’t want to do fun things anymore. They’re the couple that has been tagged old and boring. Basically, if you’re THAT couple, your friends see you as mom and dad.

To this girl, we’re the lame old people who would rather bake cookies and play Scrabble than hang out with our friends.

And that both shocks and offends me. Read More »

Last week, my boyfriend and I found this group of guys who boffer (it’s basically sword fighting role play) so that he could do a documentary about them. I went with because I was bored and figured I could help Matt out. I was expecting a group of stereotypical Dungeons and Dragons nerds; aka fat white boys who have no social lives. Well, we show up and there were, dare I say, really hot guys there!

Since I was just there to be Matt’s assistant, I sat on the porch while he filmed the guys doing their thing. I was just watching until one of the gents came over to the porch to get something. He noticed me just sitting there and kept trying to get me to join them. I kept telling him I’d have no idea what I’d be doing and I’d make a fool of myself, but he kept trying to get me to play along with them. He even offered to let me use the good weapons. (Ooo lala!) There was just no way that I was going to try to sword fight with these guys, so I stayed on the porch. Later this guy decided to keep tapping me on the shoulder from behind with his sword (his actual foam sword for those of you with dirty minds) and would pretend to be minding his own business when I turned around. Read More »

So I don’t know if you’ve heard, but Valentine’s Day is coming up.

Yes, as we gratefully leave the frigid cold of January behind, we embrace the month of love…which, since becoming a single, leaves a frigid cold place in my heart. And as V-day creeps closer and closer with each passing day, I dread it more and more.

Everywhere I go I am reminded of my impending doom. Walking to class, I pass what seems like hundreds of fliers reminding me to get tickets to the Valentine’s Day gala, to buy my sweetie a singing telegram, and to send roses to that special someone… And if knowing that I have no one to take to the gala/listen to my singing telegram/accept some beautiful roses didn’t make me feel crappy enough, all of the profits from these promotions are going to Haiti. Great. So now I’m a bad person for not being part of a couple and not helping people in need.

Can someone pass me some brownie batter?! Read More »