Girls Next Door’s leading ladies, Kendra Wilkinson, Holly Madison, and Bridget Marquardt are slowly trickling off the bunny ranch. To Hef’s dismay, his girls are looking for bigger and better (and dare we say younger?) things in life. So let’s re-cap:

First, Holly, Hef’s main squeeze, discovered about six months ago that her little Puffin had no intention of getting married OR having children. (But let’s be real, Holly. I know you love him and all, but the man is 82. Did you really think he’d want to go down that road at this age…again? Regardless, we love you for trying.) After discovering the chances of becoming the next Mrs. Hef were slim, fat, and none, Madison got pretty depressed and announced her split from Hefner. Since then, it’s been confrimed Holly’s dating mindfreak, Criss Angel. Read More »

This was a strange week. Really strange.

“First my mom (and a whole bunch of old people) joined Facebook. Then I find out that women don’t orgasm during sex, TRL decides to close its doors, dudes like having sex when their lady is on the rag and Hugh Hefner lost one of his ladies to a magician?

Sarah Palin’s email was hacked into.

I had some plastic thing shoved into my baby maker.

My friend got a man and I got jealous.

Is it a full moon or something?

I definitely need a drink, but do I go to a house party for free booze, or the bar for a better scene? Or maybe I shouldn’t even get dolled up and stay home to bake a pie with rum instead.

Hm. The pie isn’t a good idea, especially since I only pretend to work out and I want to make sure to fit into some awesome new runway inspired duds. And maybe the bar isn’t a good idea either, considering the future of my wallet is totally unknown.

I’ll just have my boys pick up a 30 pack. Pure bliss.

One is an old dude with an obsession with ditzy blondes. The other is a weird guy with an obsession with jewelry…and making things disappear.

And it seems the world has brought these drastically different men together…to battle.

For a woman, obvi.

Though Hugh Hefner has 3 live-in girlfriends and a billion other hot ladies roaming around his house, he has recently been heartbroken as one of his favorites moved out.

Where did she go? Into the tattooed arms of Criss Angel. Poor Hef has never been snubbed like this; especially for a nobody like Criss Angel. I feel bad for the poor old guy and have to wonder what it is about Mr. Angel that wooed little Holly away.

Maybe I’m missing something. Maybe Criss has a killer personality and is awesome in bed. Maybe Holly was sick of waiting for Hef’s Viagra to kick in. Who knows?

I just want to know which dude you’d prefer: reliable old Hef, or mysterious Criss Angel?

It’s Britney, y’all!

Like her new sound, the first words off of Britney Spears’s fresh single are a little hardcore. Following Timberlake and Furtado, Spears is leaving her candy pop behind and getting down and dirty with hard beats and a sexually tinged chorus.

Then again, when was our girl ever NOT tinged with sexuality?

The single, released late on Thursday night, isn’t the best thing I’ve ever heard, but it certainly doesn’t suck, and seems twice as amazing considering that as of late, Ms. Spears has appeared absolutely bat sh*t crazy. Read More »