Lesson #42- You are more than the guys you like. And think about. And obsess over.

College is a pretty consuming thing. Schoolwork including homework, group projects with people you wished you’d never met and studying for exams that promise to take up most of your time that week. Throw in a social scene — whether it’s your sorority’s slew of mixers and events or just hitting up the local bar scene for Thirsty Thursday with your best friends — and finding a balance becomes an art form. Oh, and don’t forget studying for exams that could determine the rest of your life like the LSAT or GRE, avoiding your mother’s incessant phone calls and the intensive yoga class that’s got you wondering if you’ll ever stop feeling sore.

So if a guy doesn’t take up the majority of your life, then why does he take up the majority of things running through your mind? Read More »

It’s a commonly accepted notion that middle school is an awkward time for everyone. Sparkle body gel, sassy slogan tees, unexpected growth spurts…oh, those wild pre-teen years! Probably the best part (or rather, the only good part) of the pre-hair straightener era was our infatuation with the hunky young celebs of the day. How how my heart would swoon when I thought of running my fingers through their sexy bowl-cuts!

All I can say is, no game of MASH was complete without my top 10 dreamy old-school crushes…

10. Devon Sawa in Wild America

9. Ben Savage as Cory Matthews in Boy Meets World. Don’t make like you didn’t love him, too!

8. Adrien Grenier circa Drive Me Crazy

7. Will Smith as the Fresh Prince of Bel Air

6. Joshua Jackson in Mighty Ducks, then again on Dawson’s Creek

5. Ryan Phillipe as a reformed bad boy in Cruel Intentions

4. Heath Ledger back when he had that dirty long hair in 10 Things I Hate About You

3. Brad Pitt in the epic, super-sexy Legends of the Fall

2. Leonardo DiCaprio circa his stint on Growing Pains

1. Can you guess who our number one old-school crush is? Hint: Today’s his birthday!

I’d like to consider myself a fairly sane person. I wear clothing, avoid drama, and know nothing about voo doo. I don’t have a secret alias, or an imaginary friend, or a meth problem. No skeletons in my closet, just a bulging IKEA shoe rack and a gallon-sized refill of Febreze.

Decidedly not crazy.

Yet for some reason, whenever a particularly witty, charming, attractive male glides into the picture, my so-called sanity gets a little shaky. Suddenly, I find myself Googling his name at 2AM, skimming news briefs about what appears to be a highlight-filled yet short-lived high school soccer career. I’m not crazy, I rationalize; I simply want to be informed.

We’ve all been there. Or at least I hope we’ve all been there, because I really don’t want to be the only one who creeps like this. Guys I like just make me a little bit of a nutter. Fingers crossed these apply to you too. Read More »

I have an inner Chub-Scout. Sometimes, on binge days, she gets embraced a little tighter than usual. I use the term to be funny about it, and it tends to get a laugh, but it’s the bane of my existence.

By looking at me, you probably would just be confused by this statement until you saw me on this “binge” or “cheat” day. I’m your average twenty-something: purposefully purchasing jeans that do not induce OSTS, and have even been called ‘thin’ by the rare observer. Which is nice. But in my head, dear reader, it’s sweet but simply not true.

Bottom line is: no matter how I look now, I was the fat kid.

I know what you’re thinking: if I appear to be an average-sized girl now, what difference does it make that I spent my childhood chubby? The weight didn’t stay with me, right?

Not even close.

A fat-kid complex isn’t something you can shed by counting calories and drinking your eight glasses of water a day. Not when you’ve been on a diet half your life, have dealt with the name-calling and — what can actually be worse — being flat-out ignored. You’re stuck with those memories of the gangly girls in your elementary school classes calling you “fat” with that look of disdain, like you’re a failure at life because you’re bigger. You’re ignored by the boys you have crushes on in junior high and high school, convinced that your fate is to go unwanted.

And so it’s been ingrained in your head. You don’t know why it has to be this way, but what you are is not good enough. Period. Read More »

I remember the night that I first met this guy. In my head it plays out like a movie scene—the room began to move in slow motion, everyone else around me faded away. He was just that beautiful. When we shook hands I felt a spark and saw the twinkle in his eyes that made me fall in love with him every single time I saw him. Unfortunately, after doing a bit of research around town, I learned that he had a girlfriend. Freakin’ figures, right?

He and I ended up becoming really close friends, and spent a lot of time together. My feelings for him never went away and it began to be kind of a running joke between the two of us, and everyone else we knew—our friends knew, his girlfriend thought it was funny. And sometimes I thought I was crazy, but I always felt like there was something else there between us. I would catch him staring at me from across the room, and every time he would walk past me he had to put his hands on me someplace. But… he loved his girlfriend so I didn’t think too much about it and figured it was part of the running joke. Read More »