The first date… those three words alone are enough to fill my soul with terror. The person likes you enough to go out with you, but did they just agree to be nice, or do they really like you? Do they mean to be friends? Have you just completely misjudged their advances? What if they act really overzealous? What if they act really uninterested?

It’s clear that there’s a lot to worry about when you meet up with somebody for the first time, so try to cross at least one thing off of the Worry List by having a low-stress meal. These five things are not the way to go for first date fare:

1. Mexican.

Refried beans are soooo delicious, yes, but the effects are musical, and you really don’t want that to happen at an inopportune time.

2. Sandwiches/burgers more than three inches thick.

Honestly, these are the most annoying things ever, and they will embarrass you when you least expect it. When you finally maneuver the thing so that it’s possible to put it in your mouth, everything inside it will inevitably spill out onto either your hands or your lap. (Editor’s Note: Sounds familiar to the bedroom festivities later. Ayoooo!) You can’t eat them with a knife and fork, either, for fear of looking like an extreme neatnik. Read More »

I would consider myself a bit of a foodie. I like good food and I will try most anything once.

I say most anything because this I will not try.

We all know that China partakes in some odd cuisine, but a restaurant that specializes in PENISES? And TESTICLES?

At China’s only specialty penis emporium, located in Bejiing, you can try the penis and testicles of a Russian dog, donkey penis (good for the skin), reindeer and snake. Apparently, snakes have two penises each. More for the eating, I suppose??

Nancy, the “nutritionist” as she calls herself, served BBC food writer Andrew Harding an array of penises and testicles. She also gave him a deer blood and vodka cocktail to wash it all down.

The restaurant serves a “penis hotpot,” similar to fondue but will prepare the food anyway the customer desires. Some like it raw. And that’s what they get. Read More »