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Dear Gossip Girl,

I’m going to put this bluntly: it’s time to call it quits.

I say this not because I hate you but because I used to love you. Once upon a time you were the highlight of my Monday night, rivaling even The Bachelor for the most sacred spot in my heart. You were funny and entertaining and Upper East Side style scandalous without being ridiculous. (For future reference, here’s a barometer: Blair sleeping with Chuck in the back of his limo? Okay. Chuck trading Blair and her services to his Uncle in exchange for is hotel? Not okay. Thinly veiled drug references? Okay. Chuck openly talking about his coke habit in last week’s episode? Not okay.) Your characters were fresh and unique, and not completely overpowered by guest stars, and everybody had a plot. I mean, really, all Nate does now is make out with guest stars.

Maybe if you stuck to your original formula you wouldn’t have to drop both Taylor Momsen and Jessica Szohr, two regulars that have been there from the beginning. Now, I can understand Taylor Momsen; that girl went off the slutty deep end. But Vanessa? Jessica Szohr is a gorgeous girl and an amazing role model. What did she ever do to you? Except turn into an evil, annoying character. Which is all your fault.

I think these latest developments signal only one thing. This show has run it’s course. It’s time to call it a day, Gossip Girl.  Close up your doors and end the series, before you become just another One Tree Hill.

Sincerely,
A concerned former  fan.

When I was twelve, all I wanted was to be a cheerleader.  Okay, so this didn’t really set me apart from any of my peers; becoming cheerleader is right up there with “actress” and “ballerina” in terms of typical pipe dreams for young girls.  But for me, the quest to become one the few, the proud, the peppy had very little to do with the cute uniforms or notions of sisterly bonding.  I wanted to cheer because I was actually an accomplished gymnast with a penchant for performing in front of a crowd.  I still think that this combination would have made me a great cheerleader – but I never got the chance to find out for sure.  Why?  Because I made the mistake of watching Bring It On with my mom before I entered high school.My mom took one look at the girls in the movie: their perpetually exposed midriffs, love of sabotaging one another, and less than intelligent vernacular, and told me in no unclear terms that I was never allowed to cheer.

Read More »

Jennifer Hudson looks hot, has it all.

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That shapeless "dress" is what you get for lying to Dan!

I think we can all agree that it’s not nearly as fun watching Vanessa Abrams be a bitch as it is watching Blair Waldorf.  Mostly because Blair doesn’t normally get bogged down by remorse…at least not right away.

In an episode all about playing games, some people just didn’t know when to stop.  Take Vanessa being even more of a home-wrecker than usual.  As I watched her almost mess up the blossoming love between Dan and Olivia, all I could think about was how the dress that the wardrobe people put her in at the end of the episode was obviously punishment for her being selfish.  And my next thought: when did giving a speech at a Parents’ Weekend dinner become so damn important?

But as Vanessa, Blair, (and Olivia, though unbeknownst to her) battled it out for the right to stand atop the flowery podium at Parents’ Weekend, we saw too many claws come out. Perfectly manicured claws, mind you, but sharp claws nonetheless. Yeah, Vanessa can get off the hook quickly for what she almost did to Dan and Olivia – those Humphrey’s are incredibly forgiving people – but I can’t say the same for Blair and Chuck. Make him kiss a guy (which, by the way, was incredibly hot)? Fine. But lie to him and manipulate him to get what you want?

No one manipulates Chuck Bass. Not even Blair.

And the same goes for Serena, which Nate Archibald may find out the hard way. Before I get into this little Rounders-meets-Gossip-Girl storyline, I’d like to take a moment to welcome Nate back to the show. For the past 5 episodes he’s taken a backseat with Bree Buckley and we haven’t seen much of his cuteness. I know he wasn’t pregenant/post pregnant like Lily Bass, so I wonder what was keeping him from the screen? Meh, it doesn’t matter; he’s back….and falling in line with the family once again. Read More »

Me. Crying. For the entire scene.

Call me a sap all you want, but there were tears this week. Real ones.

First they were tears of frustration and anger – crying because the scene that I have been anticipating for weeks, when Rufus and Lily finally discover that Scott is their son, was squished into some 15 second clip where Georgina walks by and breezily mentions it. But then it became tears of happiness as Rufus professed his undying love to Lily and told her to stop getting cold feet and just move them down the aisle already. And then the tears turned to even more happiness and love when Scott and his parents hugged and cried and proved that children given up by their parents at birth really can re-integrate into their previous families twenty years later.

Sounds kind of like a Lifetime movie, but I’ll work with it. Box of tissues in hand.

Sidetrack to Georgina for a second: The only word for her this episode is CREEPY. And I’m not just talking about her whole I-love-Dan-and-I’ll-do-whatever-it-takes-to-get-him-back thing. Is she getting paler and more wide-eyed every episode? I know it suits her overly-involved obsessive personality, but come on, makeup artists – ever hear of bronzer? Maybe if she started reading CollegeCandy she’d learn some much needed makeup tips and how to spot a guy who isn’t into her so she can move on instead of trying to ruin things for him and his superstar, hot, Hilary Duff actress girlfriend. But more importantly, she’d learn a few things about bronzer.

Now back to Rufus and Lily: After tip-toeing around each other, they finally tie the knot at the Brooklyn loft (insert more tears that their perfect garden with perfect flowers in perfect weather didn’t get to happen). Jenny made the gorgeous wedding gown, Serena wore some fabulous frock that made her boobs look ridic and Jenny wore….my grandma’s moo moo. I wept for her stylists.

We all know that no big event on the Upper East Side could ever run smoothly and a Lily Bass wedding is no exception. Even before the big “this is your son” debacle, we finally learned that Carter Basin scammed the Buckleys into paying off his debts. But last we saw, his gorgeous body and that face-so-hot-it-makes-me-tear-up were sandwiched between two very large Texans and about to be used to pay back his bookie fees. Apparently Southern families never forget. And apparently those Southern girls will do anything to help their families, and that includes using one poor Nate Archibald. Poor kid, he really thought that Brie was falling for him. He should have listened to the astonishing, gorgeous, please-let-me-be her Blair Waldorf.

“No girl is that nice.”

And no other girl would get an amazing Chuck Bass massage, a moment I watched with tears in my eyes since my boyfriend doesn’t take cross-continental massage technique lessons.

Well, at least I’m not Carter Basin. Homeboy’s in for some serious pain. We’ll just have to see how it all goes down next week. Until then….

You know you love them.
XOXO.
GGR.
(Gossip Girl Recapper)

Thank you, television Gods.

For a week there, I thought that my beloved Gossip Girl was destined to go the way of The O.C., becoming a drama where the only superior things were wardrobe choices. But after watching episode two of the season, it seems that the drama and romance we cannot live without is here to stay and growing better by the week.

And the guys are looking so. much. hotter. College did those boys gooood.

Well, for some. For Chuck Bass it was that businessman/entrepreneurial drive that turned up his sexy factor. That boy looks good when he’s holding meetings with rich old guys to get his restaurant/sex club off the ground. Too bad dear old stepsister Serena seems to thwart him at every turn. Poor Chuck finally has a vision and a plan to do something great in the future and Serena goes and ruins it for him.

If she didn’t have such an amazing wardrobe (that orange romper? I die) I’d totally hate her. She’s become the annoying little sister and has a knack for messing everything up. I’m pretty sure the same will be said (in 4 episodes, max) of her new relationship with super hottie, Carter Basin. Read More »

There are a lot of celebrities out there that simply disappear, whether it be voluntarily or due to lack of talent/rehab/Bermuda triangle.  There are a couple that have massive amounts of issues, yet refuse to disappear.  In fact, they seem to pop up everywhere, strutting around uninvited on every red carpet.  People like Bai Ling and Paris Hilton are prime examples.

More recently, we have Mischa Barton.  I gotta admit, I really do enjoy watching a mediocre TV actress fall from grace (and she fell hard!).  Oh, speaking of mediocre actresses, I think I heard the other day that Tara Reid has teamed up with the douchebag powerhouse that is Christian Audigier to design some piece of crap that I’ll certainly see all around campus.  Yay.

In light of that wonderful piece of news, I think it’s time to pair up a couple of the most washed up faces in Hollywood:  Mischa Barton and Tara Reid. Read More »

I used to love ANTM. Ever since 2003, thanks to the CW, and the countless marathons on VH1 and MTV, I’ve been obsessed with all things Top Model. I remember Shandi’s “Shanthrax” t-shirts, drunk Brittany, Nicole being a crybaby, crazy-ass Jade… and literally screaming at my TV when Whitney was crowned Top Model of cycle 10. Now, however, on Cycle 12 it feels as if my love for ANTM may have run its course. Is it worth my Wednesdays? I’m torn.

Love It:

Why do we love any reality show? Not for the photo sessions; it’s obviously about the drama. The issues that come from 13 girls competing for the title of “prettiest” living together in a house is undeniable, and makes for many memorable moments. Remember when Shandi cheated on her boyfriend with the male model? Or when Joanie had her teeth pulled? How about Camille and her “signature walk” that was supposed to “make her famous?” And then there was Melrose always tried to give “advice” to everyone…

Bottom line: the “drama” in the show is funny! I’m sure it was a huge deal to Cycle 7′s Jaeda to get her hair cut short, but watching her melt down and cry because of it was hilarious for me!

If the contestants aren’t ridiculous enough, Tyra Banks is the creator and top-judge of the program. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tyra as a model and her talk show is a guilty pleasure on sick-days, but on ANTM she is just plain crazy. That being said, I will never get sick of  her wacky outfits and hairstyles, her bizarre criticism of the girls, her desire to be a photographer or her constant reminders to “smile with your eyes!” Plus she sings the show’s theme song! Girl does it all. Read More »

"I'm sorry I tried to ruin your life to get onto Page 6"

After a two-week hiatus (WTF, CW?) Gossip Girl returned last night. I don’t know if I can handle any more breaks, but OMG, was it worth the wait!  As the weather changes outside, so are our friends from the Upper East Side.

First, let me start by saying how happy I was to see Cyrus again!  That little bald nugget of a stepdad is one of those gems (like Dorota) that make Gossip Girl sparkle.  Especially since Dorota was off falling in love and Vanessa was MIA, too!   She finally gets a good storyline, AND a backbone, and suddenly she’s nowhere to be seen. Was that delicious plotline with her and Chuck just a tease? WAS IT?

And with Rufus deciding to close down the art gallery, where is she gonna brew her coffee? What on earth is going to happen to V?

Also, can I just say that I am secretly really happy that the economy is affecting GG, though a bit peeved that it was the Humphrey’s that got crapped on. I’m pretty sure there are plenty of wealthy people out there who were hit hard in this recession, so why is it the “poor” Brooklyn family that gets it? And, being that they are in a bit of financial ruin, why would Rufus care about Dan getting a job? And why doesn’t my dad feel that way? But secretly Dan did get a job, and how cute did he look in that uniform?  Presh. Read More »