Kristen Stewart almost looks like she has an expression on this month’s cover of Glamour. I don’t know how to feel about this. Sullen works for her, but I can’t begrudge her any attempts to look happy or engaged.

This month’s issue is pretty inoffensive. There was a strong emphasis on health, which I appreciate. And I was reminded that Mercury retrograde falls over Thanksgiving this year, so I’m already mentally preparing for a hot mess holiday of ridiculous proportions. Even the relationship section was less horrific than usual. There was an articled on “How to be a Man-Magnet” that had some good pieces of advice (don’t insult other women, be proud of your ambitions, don’t expect every guy to be marriage material…), though some gems were a little less constructive.

Glamour says: Be easygoing
Jasmine says: Easygoing is a character trait, not something you can just will yourself to do. Some of us are a little more intense than others, and that can be just as attractive as being the girl with NP cares in the world.

Glamour says: Don’t dress for girls.
Jasmine says: Dress however you want. Whether you feel most confident in a bandage dress and five inch stilettos or a maxi dress and mocassins, do you. Guys would have us all walking around in jeans and a t-shirt, which, while classic, is kind of snoozeworthy.

Glamour says: No bitching.
Jasmine says: Isn’t one of the joys of being an adult bonding with other adults about things that suck?

Glamour says: Perfect the art of sexting.
Jasmine says: Sexting is mad overrated. I enjoy a sexy text as much as the next person, but it is not the end-all and be-all of flirting.

I have a confession to make. And I’m not proud of it. In fact, on the list of things I’m most ashamed of, this one ranks higher than DVRing Jerseylicious (as in, setting up a series recording) and that semester when I didn’t wash my sheets once (even though I did have guests over…frequently).

So here goes.

[Breathes in heavily.]

I have a major weakness for boys who cock their hats off to the side at a 45 degree angle.

There. I said it.

But it’s not my fault. You have no idea how many guys like this exist at Michigan. They’re…everywhere. And while a lot of them might be majorly douchey, a lot of them are also really, really hot. What can I say? I like a guy with swagger. And confidence. And good jeans (because the tilted hat is always paired with a hot pair of Sevens…)

Judge me if you will (and lord knows you will…harshly), but I know I’m not the only one with a soft spot for guys – and qualities guys possess – we all know we should hate…and often claim we do.

Like the jerk. Do I really even need to talk about this? Every girl on EARTH says she just wants a nice guy, someone to treat her right and blah blah blah. And what happens? The guy with the cocked hat wham bam thank you maams her and she’s smitten as a kitten, following him around like a sad, hungry puppy dog (in eyeliner and tight jeans that make her butt look good). Meanwhile, the nice guy she’s been leading on for 6 months just sits there until she comes around to have him pick up the pieces.

And muscles. Sure, we’re all “Ew, Ronnie is a roid rager,” and yeah, that’s probably true…but you can’t deny that he’s got a pretty sick bod. And that maybe if he didn’t break Sammie’s glasses or have that problem in his anus, you’d want to take him to the smush room.

OK, so maybe Ronnie is a bad example. But as much as we’re all “I don’t need muscles – I just like a guy with a little squish who I can snuggle up with,” would anyone really toss Tyson Beckford, Ryan Reynolds or Zac Efron out of their bed? Hell to the no.

And then there’s money. Look, I’m an independent woman just as much as Beyonce the next girl; I want to be successful and powerful and make a lot of money on my own. I don’t need a man to support me…. But I kinda want one. Not to support me totally, but you can’t deny the joy that comes with being showered with lavish gifts, going on amazing vacations, and watching The Bachelorette on a giant screen TV…from the tub (a joy I only understand after house sitting for some rich-ass people in college. My god – that is the LIFE).

Money doesn’t buy happiness, sure, but a guy with money is inherently sexier. Just ask anyone who’s ever had the urge to get naked with Hugh Hefner. (Note: I’d totally get naked with Hugh Hefner. And that, my friends, is another one to add to my list of shame.)

And you know what else is sexy in that “I don’t want anyone to know I think this” sorta way?

-Madras shorts
-Boat Shoes
-The “I spent a ton of time doing my hair to make it look like I didn’t spend any time doing it” hairstyle
-An Ivy League education (Or, for me at least, any college education that didn’t happen at Ohio State.)
-Tight-ish jeans (Note: not hipster skinny jeans. But actually, now that I think about it, some guys do look hot in hipster skinny jeans….)
-Guys running shirtless
-Guys in sweaty shorts at the gym
-Guys who get manicures and/or pedicures

Shameful, I know. But at least I’m being honest, unlike the rest of you who drool at 90% of these things (and more) but would never admit it.

Speaking of which, maybe it’s time we all admit our shameful attractions. Sound off below. And after you’re done with that, hop on over to CoedMagazine.com to see what guys are attracted to even though they’ll never admit it…

[He Said/She Said is a series designed to help all our wonderfully confused readers figure out what he’s really thinking. So every week we’ll be throwing out a topic for debate…and unlike our fave dude, these guys won’t be sugar coating anything for you. But before you jump into their heads (which seriously will make you feel like you need to shower), check out what we think!]

Whether you’re a guy or a girl, gay or straight, old or young, one of the most frustrating things about liking someone is not knowing if they like you back. Wait, no – that’s not totally right. The most frustrating thing is the amount of time wasted thinking/wondering/analyzing/wishing they like you and then playing games to make them show it.

I can honestly say that about 79% of my college career was spent wondering if the socially awkward Jewish boy who wasn’t cute in high school but came to college, learned how to do his hair and got a good pair of jeans I liked at the moment felt the same way about me. (For the record, the other 20% of the time was spent in an actual relationship where I knew the boy liked me, and the remaining 1% was spent planning for my future, considering a career path and “studying”…)

My mind was filled with thoughts like:

Does it mean he likes me if he texted me first?
And used an emoticon?
Left a witty message on my Facebook wall?
Spent the whole night talking to me at the bar?
Bought me a Natty Ice?
Asked me to stay over, then spent the evening doing pleasurable things to me until the morning light started peeking through the tapestry he had hanging over his window without getting ANY pleasure in return (what? You know I’m not a fan of it….), and then drove me home and kissed me goodbye only not to call or text for 4 whole days?

As you can imagine, it was exhausting, and I constantly found myself wondering, “Why can’t guys make it obvious when they’re not interested like we girls do?”

And then I realized: maybe we girls aren’t so clear either. Maybe guys don’t understand that me not sitting next to them in lecture means I don’t want to see them naked. Or that the fact that I’m not texting them back every 4 seconds means I’m not really feelin’ it.

So I decided it was time to end the madness once and for all. To clear it all up so we can stop wasting time with the “are they or aren’t they??” and have more time to spend on the “let’s get naked and show one another how much we care.”

So let’s do it. Here are 5 major signs that a girl’s not interested:

1. She doesn’t keep the convo going: A girl will do her damndest not to text or IM or call you first. She doesn’t want to come on too strong, after all. But you better believe that if she likes you, she’ll pray you reach out first, then keep that ish going and going and going until you propose marriage. If her texts are one-word responses (“yeah.”) or don’t leave room for further convo (“cool”), she’s not interested.

2. She only texts after midnight: Much like guys, sometimes we ladies just want a warm body – any warm body – next to us. So an after-midnight text doesn’t mean she wants to snuggle and have a romantic Sunday-morning brunch. It means that her sexy outfit didn’t work at the bar, she has no one else to go home with and she needs some attention from you to make her feel better about herself.

3. She’s talking to other people: When a girl likes a guy, she’ll do anything to be near him, to charm him, to touch his arm. So if you’re at a party and she keeps finding excuses to get away (“Whoops, need more….beer!” or “Oh, this kid from my Stats class is over there. Gotta talk about the test with him!”), she’s not playing hard to get. She’s playing gotta get away.

4. She lets you see her at her worst: We all want to believe that our opposite-sex best friend loves us, they just don’t know it yet. I know; I’ve been there….4 times. But the truth is, if there’s EVER a chance that we ladies might have feelings for a dude, we’ll primp for him. Mascara, flat iron, perfume in all the right places. If she’s inviting you over to watch a movie while she cuts her toenails and plucks her eyebrows…yeah, not happening, bro.

5. She turns down a free drink. Seriously, we’ll take free cocktails from ANYONE. Even the creepy old guy who’s always saddled up to the bar. (Sidenote: why is there always a creepy old guy at every college bar? Who let him in? And did he have to wait in line for 45 minutes, too?) If we’re not taking one from you, not only are we not interested but, god, something is SERIOUSLY wrong with you.

Agree? Disagree? Got anything to add? Share it in the comments section below. And then check out Coedmagazine to find out the obvious, blinking signs a dude’s just not that into you…

The cover story was predictable sap, a famous star insisting that she’s really just a big dork who, in this case, loves to sing Taylor Swift songs in her car.  Twenty-one-year-old Lucy also makes a rather unfortunate comparison between the character she plays in her newest movie and Miley Cyrus, and pulls out some sermon about what it takes to be a role model.  But she plays the best character on one of the most addictive TV shows out there (Pretty Little Liars), and has really pretty eyes and a surprisingly beautiful singing voice, so I’ll her forgettable interview slide.

This issue kept going with the whole bright theme – from urging readers to wear hot pink matte lipstick (try it, it’s actually really fun) to pimping out some crazy neon hair accessories.  The not so bright spot in all this?  Their fashion section, which tells girls everywhere that it’s cool to wear flat oxfords with a nice dress, accompanied by a picture of Kendall Jenner looking totally leggy and gorgeous in her ensemble.  Like, HELLO?  We don’t wear heels because we love the way they feel; some of us need a little stiletto so that our legs don’t look like little stubs.  Every bone in my five-foot–tall body burned at this.  But hey, if you can get away with this look (or have a body like Kendall Freaking Jenner), more power to you.

But enough of that, let’s get on to the juicy stuff, shall we?  Seventeen runs a piece on sex trafficking in Thailand and Hong Kong, which features Shay Mitchell (also of Pretty Little Liars fame) talking about her work to bring justice to victims.  Way to go, Seventeen! Those are the kind of celebrity role models you should focus on – not girls who claim they’ll never touch a drop of alcohol.

Strangely enough, this issue is lacking in a “sex-ed” type column, which is too bad because those are usually the easiest (and most fun) to tear apart.  Luckily, my second favorite type of column appears: a how-to guide to flirting.  It’s called “Get Flirting Confidence” and it’s….well, see for yourself.

Seventeen says: “Try your move on a guy who doesn’t really matter to you so that you have a non-scary way to figure out what works…a cute waiter is the perfect test run because it’s his job to pay attention to you!
Zara says:  So basically if you sense a “real connection” with the guy who always waits your table at your favorite happy hour spot, it’s all a lie.  He’s just paying attention to you because he wants a good tip.  Great.  And also – since when do waiters have the time to hang around and listen to a girl who’s practicing her flirting technique? And do we have to pay more for that kind of service?

Seventeen says: “When you’re acting as the sidekick for a flirt friend, you get to be part of the action without any pressure.  Seeing how she talks to guys will rub off on you – soon you’ll be ready to jump right in.”
Zara says: What happened to “just by yourself and guys will like you?”  Come ON, Seventeen!

Seventeen says: “When you’re hanging out with guy friends, pay attention to what they talk about and what cracks them up.  Being totally comfortable in a guy world helps you hold your own around a cutie you like and may even give you a few jokes to steal.”
Zara says: If you’re gonna go this route, just be prepared to talk about farting.  And boobs.  A lot. But not too much. No matter what Seventeen says, there’s nothing sexy about a girl telling a personal fart story. Just trust me on this.

Seventeen says: “It’s easier to say something bold to your crush over text.  But when you get in the habit of throwing out those lines (and realize that most of the time they actually work!), you’ll get up the guts to try it in person.  Just hit send already!
Zara says: …And this is where you consult a previous issue for a guide to sexting….err, I mean “flirty texting.”

For even more bad advice for today’s youth, click here!

Dear Tuffy Luv,
Girl, I need your all-knowing wisdom BAD!! I have two boys…and it’s come time for me to choose between the two. Here’s the problem: they’re opposites!

On one hand, we have G. The sensitive, intelligent musician. After meeting just a couple months ago, we went through a period of hanging out everyday and frequent (no-sex) sleepovers, but we’ve since cooled down. I suppose you’d call us glorified FWB, although we actually like each other! (LOL?) This was fine and good, until I realized I was starting to blow him off to hang out with what I affectionately call “my boys,” my group of all-male best friends. Which leads us to….

B. The guy’s guy. We’re only friends at this point, but since we first met (through our mutual male best friend, C), there’s been this crazy sexual tension and the other guys in our group are constantly picking on us. He’s not the smartest fella in the world, but we have the same sense of humor, and he’s incredibly protective and sweet!

My question for you is: do I take a chance on B or remain with my current guy, G? Which would you choose?! Please help!!

Sincerely,
Torn

Dear Torn,

Go with B.

You clearly are over it with G. I mean, it’s like–please, girl.

Sometimes relationships end. In fact, almost ALL relationships end. (All if we’re being technical about the big D-E-A-T-H, but let’s just be like less morbid here.)

Your time with G is over. It’s nothing personal, right? He’s okay. You like him. But, like you said, more as a FRIEND.

The great thing is, you have a ton of male friends. So G will transfer over juuuuust fine.

Why waste your time? Go out and have fun. Chances are, B won’t be The One (or, like, One of The Major Ones), but how the floop are you going to know if you don’t go for it?! Don’t cheat. Don’t play games. Just tell G things aren’t working out but you’d love to stay friends, and then go hang out with Mr. B.

I have a feeling G’s gonna see it coming.

See, we need to be in good relationships, Tuffettes. And if we’re not in good relationships–good meaning HEALTHY, SAFE, AND ENJOYABLE–then we get out of them. And that’s the strong woman’s way.

After flipping through one depressing story on humanity after another, I finally started recognizing the lighthearted and ridiculous Glamour I begrudgingly love. Silly insight into guys, decent sex advice, and drool-worthy summer fashion were all present.

And then I saw an article on how to become a spy. I have secretly wanted to be a spy since I first saw Jennifer Garner kicking butt as Sydney Bristow on Alias. (Why has she been relegated to bad rom-com hell, by the way? I blame Ben Affleck.) So I was totally geeking out over this interview with a former CIA spy and seriously contemplating sending my resume to various intelligence agencies… until I got totally derailed by “How Can You Tell If He’s A Spy?” Yes, a litmus test for determining if your crush is an intelligence officer. Cackles galore, y’all.

Glamour says: “Does he have standout good looks? [The CIA] tends to recruit lookers…on the logic that we like to talk to attractive people.”
Jasmine says: There is a time and a place to question someone’s occupation and intentions. But when you’re being chatted up by someone who would make Chace Crawford look fug, there are probably far more interesting things to think about.

Glamour says: “Does he duck questions about what he does. Most people are clear about what they do, but agency types are squirrely.”
Jasmine says: Sure, that shifty guy could be a spy. Or maybe he’s unemployed and doesn’t want to talk about it, or he’s Mariah Carey’s understudy umbrella holder (when Nick Cannon is not available, obvs), which, for some reason, he might find embarrassing.

Glamour says: “Does he seem a bit cocky for, say, an accountant? CIA spies – especially men – are notoriously full of themselves.”
Jasmine says: And so are douchebags, which occur in nature far more frequently than spies. Just saying.

Glamour says: “Does he duck out of photos? Spies often do.”
Jasmine says: Or maybe he thinks your selfies suck just as much as your besties secretly do.

What’s goin on here, Glamour? You got the skeevy guys of the world lobbying for some attention up in Glamour HQ or something? Look, as much as we all wish the guy we’re talking to is a CIA operative going on secret missions to secret places every week, it’s far more likely that he’s just a cocky, jobless, shady douchebag trying to get us into bed. So let’s stop playing into the readers’ fantasies and luring them into situations (and beds) they’ll regret, K? K.

To see even more funny fun times from everyone’s favorite fashion/lifestyle magazine, click here!

Because when we think about dating that’s what we all think about, isn’t it? The cute meet. The crush. The will they or won’t they. The first date. After that, if we ever get passed that, it all seems like it’s smooth sailing. But that’s not always the case. Especially for women who end up dating someone outside of their race.

Farr draws on her own experiences with interracial dating and the difficulties that can arise with these complicated situations. She discusses her experience, as well as her marriage and her children, and offers some pretty helpful advice along the way.

Want a sneak peak? Check out her list dos and don’ts for dating outside your own race.

DON’T let other people define your relationship for you – for better or worse. Other people’s feelings are not facts.

DO take the time to enjoy and maybe even admire any new slice of American culture you might learn from someone of a different cultural background. Be that foods, holidays, favorite books or anything else that’s new to you.

DON’T forget that no matter where in the country you grew up, we are all American – and share this culture – and can revere how much we have in common as well as explore our differences.

If your relationship is new, DON’T be pushing for a meeting with their family right off the bat.  Some families may require extra time before meeting a suitor.

If your relationship is established and you still haven’t met one family- DO start talking about why not.  Talking, to each other, is the best remedy for one set of disapproving parents.

DO keep in mind that people get mad and say all kinds of things about their own mother or father – but no one wants to hear someone else talk sh*t about their parents.

If problems arise with friends or family who are not quite up to speed with your relationship, think about the long term.  DON’T fight every small battle but rather, lead the charge by the example of your solid relationship.

DON’T let any one issue define your love story – particularly race.  Even if other people see this as the headline, it doesn’t mean you have to.

DO know that every couple has things that make them different from each other. These differences can be celebrated or feared – make a conscious choice of which you want to embrace for the long haul.

DO know, that odds are, you would make some bee-u-tiful babies.

Still wanna know more? Chat with Diane on Facebook and Twitter. Oh, and watch this:

Buy the book at KissingOutsideTheLines.com

Okay, kiddos. Today we have a very special issue of Ask Tuffy Luv. Today we’re gonna–gasp–learn from our mothers. (Even though, yes, they annoy us sometimes. OK, a lot.)

I know that seems odd. But, readerinos, Aunt Tuffy gets ever so many letters from all of y’all about things I KNOW your momma taught you. So, in one fell swoop, Tuffy gonna answer the basic kinds questions she gets week after week, just by telling you what your mother already knows.

(1) Be Faithful.

Momma sez: You’re probably going to want to have a serious partner someday. Don’t blow it now by blowing through tons of guys (or girls) and burning bridges. You’re gonna form bad habits and you’re gonna get a bad reputation. So don’t cheat. It’s nature’s bad karma, donchaknow?

(2) Use Protection.

Giiiiiirl, don’t be bringing no grandbaby round! Okay, fine, bring the grandbaby. Momma will looooove that grandbaby. But, precious, I just want you to be the best you that you can be. You need time to grow and to be in a good place and in a good relationship. Besides, you don’t want any of those nasty STDs, right?! Momma knows you don’t.

(3) Long Distance is Hard. But So Is Any Relationship.

Sweetheart. You’ve got to follow that sweet heart of yours. Long distance relationships are very difficult, so if you have your doubts, don’t waste your time and energy. But if you think in your heart of hearts that he (or she) really might be The One, you’ve got to give it a shot. Trust yourself. And if it doesn’t work out, don’t punish yourself–learn from your mistakes and live your life the best you can.

(4) Do Unto Others.

Be a good friend. If your girlfriend is interested in someone, don’t hook up with him (/her). Don’t flirt. Don’t do anything that’s going to hurt your friend. And if a friend hurts you? I’ll kill ‘er. No, but really. Don’t hurt your friends, and don’t hurt anyone. If someone hurts you, tell them and then move on.

(5) Get Your Priorities Straight.

Do well in school. Work hard. Choose how you want to live your life, and live it that way to the fullest. You’ve got to pursue your goals, because, honey, your goals ain’t never gonna pursue you. Sit down, figure out what’s important to you, and do it the very best you can. And I just know you’ll do it.

Happy (belated) Mother’s Day, Moms! We love you so much.

Besides, we wouldn’t be here without you.

Hearts & Skulls,
Tuffy Luv

Get more Tough Love right here. You know, if you’re into that sort of thing.

Hi Dude!

Well here’s the deal: my boyfriend and I have been dating for a year or so. Now we’re graduating from high school and (finally!) going to college and he is going to study abroad. Since he was a virgin when we first met (yes, I popped his cherry) I think this could be a really great chance for him to have new experiences… sexy ones. I’ve always been (kind of) popular with guys so I have a lot more experience than him and so we have had some issues with his self-esteem and such.

So … how do I ask him to… you know … “explore” some new possibilities without causing a misunderstanding? I don’t want to break up with him and I really wouldn’t mind if he were to hook up another girl. Actually, I think it would help him feel less curious about how it feels to sleep with someone else. It is not as if I would let him cheat on me every time he feels like it, but (!) I think having an affair would probably help his self-steem.

Thanks for your help!
— Probably Crazy

Dear Probably crazy,
You’re probably one of the most generous girlfriends I’ve ever heard of. I mean, encouraging him to sleep with another woman to help his self-esteem? Wow…that’s so selfless. And dangerous as F*CK!

Let me see if I understand you: You want him to go abroad and sleep with other women, but you want the right to dictate he stop when you think he’s had enough new experiences. That’s, that’s what I’m getting here. Okay. So, here’s just one of several questions that comes to mind: do you get the same leeway? Oh, and then would he have the right to tell you when you shouldn’t cheat?

I’m not saying he doesn’t have an inferiority complex when it comes to between the sheets festivities but what you’re proposing isn’t just for him, it’s for you, and it’s not about creating intimacy but sidestepping it.

Maybe I’m wrong. I admit the possibility. I’m sure his inexperience and insecurity is ruining your mood. I’m sure it’s something you want him to get over. But encouraging him to chase the ball then thinking you can just yank his leash back after he grabs it and wants to play some more is ludicrous. Unless he’s some kind of sex slave. Or has an “off” button. Which would be handy for many relationships.

If you want to open things up and let him have the option of the other 30 flavors then you’ve got to accept the risks. Relationships aren’t a dictatorship (at least not healthy ones). It’s a partnership. If you want to change the terms then he’s got to have a say in the negotiations. And make no mistake, telling him that he should sleep with someone else so that he can be a better partner for you doesn’t sound reassuring or loving, no matter how much whip cream you put on top of it.

I pride myself on being a people pleaser but I can’t give you the permission I think you’d like me to. I’m not saying that polyamorous relationships can’t work, but ones that don’t start that way have a lesser chance for long-term success.

I’d really reconsider what you want out of this relationship or how much you really want it. It sounds to me like you’re trying to give him a chance to convince you to stay in it. Probably crazy, don’t treat him or yourself as possibly stupid. Tell him what you’re not satisfied with and tell him what you need: a break.

Cutting through the sh*t,
The Dude

[Isn't he amazeballs? Sigh, we know. Too bad he's taken. Check out The Dude's other insights into the male mind right here.]

Lesson 21: Forget Happily Ever After

Disney princesses from Cinderella to Sleeping Beauty, even Nala of The Lion King, have taught us from our childhood to look forward to some sort of “happily ever after.” Since our days of insisting on wearing our Disney princess Halloween costumes at completely inappropriate times (like your uncle’s wedding) we’ve desperately clung onto the notion that “happily ever after” would someday be all ours. As teenagers we claimed not to care about Prince Charming while we secretly screened each boyfriend, wondering if he was going to be the last man standing in our own charmed versions of a Disney romance. Now in college, we’re in the process of making our dreams come true and yet somehow Prince Charming keeps slipping through our fingers in a not-so-Disney fashion.

Believe me girl, I’ve been there.

Look, “happily ever after” is great and all, but how can you place so much happiness on something you haven’t even had yet? Every time you fuel the fire on achieving your own happy ending, you take away from the happiness you already have.

Unsure of what I mean? Let’s try relating this to something we can all understand – purses.  Imagine that ever since you were a little girl all you’ve wanted was a vintage black quilted, chain strap Chanel bag and you always promised yourself that someday you would get one. But until you’ve starved yourself enough to afford the Chanel bag, you’ve been using a worn-in buttery leather Coach purse. While you’re so fixated on that Chanel bag, you fail to realize just how great your trusty Coach bag is. Just like with a happy ending, if you put too much significance on an end that hasn’t even happened yet, how can you expect anything before the end to be meaningful too?

It’s time that single girls everywhere forget the “happily ever after” they’ve been trained to aim for and just enjoy the ride. The pain, the heartbreak, the awkward moments – it’s all just a part of the learning process. However, you shouldn’t be focusing on the dating learning process but instead on the process that allows you to learn about yourself, because once “happily ever after” rolls around, who knows what’ll happen? If it’s what I’ve been told, your happy ending is a time to know what you want, with little room left to figure things out.

Take advantage of the fact that this time before the “happily ever after” is your grace period. Make the mistakes you avoided and do it for the sake of knowing that it’s not the end of the world if things don’t work out. Believe in a happy ending for yourself, but don’t make your life all about achieving it. The more willing you are to enjoy the ride that is the dating world, the less you’re going to rely on the sturdy rock of a “happily ever after” and realize that you can have a “happily ever present.”

Look, I know how cheesy that sounds but when you really think about it, nobody really ever knows what happened to those Disney princesses after their happy endings. What if Cinderella got divorced when she realized she barely knew the prince? Or what if Sleeping Beauty’s Ambien high wore off and she realized she settled too quickly after her waking from her slumber? The time leading up to the happy ending always seems to be the real story worth telling, so forget “happily ever after” and just be happy where you are.

Got it? Now get the first 20 rules of the Single Girl Society right here.