It’s no secret that everyone wants honestly in their relationship, but there are some things we just DON’T want to know (or want them to know!).  Much like you wouldn’t disclose to your man exactly what happened between you and his roommate freshman year, here’s a list of things we definitely do not want to hear from guys we’re gettin’ down with:

1. His “Number”: I admit that sometimes I get curious and I’m tempted to ask, but I resist! I really don’t wanna know how many other chicks he’s gotten naked with, especially if I’m into him.

2. Bowel movements: Even if the relationship is years old, there should still be a little mystery in the bathroom. He should tell his frat brothers about what he’s doing/did/about to do (in graphic detail) in there, not me.

3. Anything positive about his ex: I don’t care if she was pretty, smart, a good cook, or great in bed. It’s best not to mention her at all, but if he must, we prefer to hear that she was some variation of a crazy person who didn’t fulfill his needs and has much, much smaller boobies. Also… Read More »

It all…it all happened so suddenly. One moment I’m completely single with fewer prospects than an English major (I can say this since I’m an English major), and the next I have a guy friend sitting in front of me saying “I like you. I like everything about you.” And…uh…this is a totally weird a rare phenomenon but I like him too. We like each other at the same time!

I asked him if he’d like to be dating-ish. His response? He liked me enough to do away with the “-ish”. And for as much as I badger guys for being commitment phobes who don’t know what they want…I was the one who wanted to keep the “ish”.

It’s not that I don’t think he’s smart and funny and sexy and the coolest person I’ve met since Zach Braff (I know. I met Zach Braff. I’m excited for me, too). It’s just that I’ve jumped head first into things about seven times too many. And now that I know what can happen, there’s a little bit of hesitation to drop those three little letters that act as my flotation device. Am I smart or cynical?

To tell the truth, falling for someone goes exactly the same way every single time. You get giggly around them. You get antsy when they haven’t called, and then can’t hide your annoying smile when their number finally pops up. You don’t eat because joy and snuggles are fulfilling enough. And to tell the truth, it all ends the same way. In tears. And if not in tears, in a pint of Ben and Jerry’s mixed intermittently with shots of vodka. Read More »

The first lesson I remember learning was the importance of sharing. I had to share my toys, I had to share my feelings and I had to share my gum with the rest of the class. Now, call me selfish, but I believe that some things in life should not be shared.

STDs, for example. Or guys?

In my mind, once a friend dates a guy, or cozies up with him for more than one night, he’s off the market to the rest of us. I mean, there’s a reason they call it “Sloppy Seconds,” right? But I’ve learned that it’s different for guys; they don’t mind hooking up with someone else’s leftovers. In fact, I know lots of girls who have made their way through an entire group of guys and none of them seemed to mind.

How can that be? Can guys really share hook ups like girls share tube tops? Let’s see what our guy had to say… Read More »

In this week’s In Touch magazine, a “friend” of John Mayer explains that the reason he is often so distant and, well, douchey, with his girlfriends is because he had his heart stomped on at 16. He was madly in love, something went wrong, and he promised never to have his heart broken again.

Awwww.

I bet that made you melt, right? I mean, it’s adorable and endearing that heartthrob John Mayer had his widdle heart bwoken! And it finally explains everything from Jessica Simpson to Jennifer Aniston and all those girls in between! It all makes sense. You are totes on Team Mayer now, aren’t ya?

Well not me. Read More »