[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She's been helping people find love for years so we thought we'd tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up, ladies.]

Have you ever met someone and wished you had a crystal ball to see into the future? Would there be a date?  Would he like your friends?   Would your parents like him?  Could a relationship form?  Does he have the potential to be “the one”?

“Love is blind” is a quote I believe in whole-heartedly, but in a little different way than most.  I find most people blindly look for love hoping to “bump” into the right person.  They look for the connection and attraction.  That’s all fine and good, but it’s not the stuff healthy relationships are made of.

It is great if you have chemistry and both of you like Lost, but if you aren’t aware of the all the other important stuff – core values, communication, deal breakers – you are probably going to wake up one day and realize you wasted your time.

I am not the dating fairy who can sprinkle magic dust and show you five, ten, or 15 years down the line.  But, by keeping your eyes open, you’d be surprised how much you can really learn about a person without spending the next six months wading around in a questionable relationship.

In fact, with a little know-how, you can learn a lot in the first 30 minutes.
Here are red flags you can watch for when you meet someone to realize if the have real dating potential. Read More »

We’re all well aware of the friends every girl needs, but what about the friends nobody wants? Is there anything more annoying than having to avoid a friend that you hate? It’s like, “stop calling me every day and messaging me on Facebook all the time and showing up in my bedroom when I’m sleeping.”

No matter how mean you are or how many times you send out restraining orders, these are the friends that keep clawing their way back into our lives. Read More »

Every week I make a list. Not a grocery list or a to-do list, because I don’t really do groceries (Pad Thai take out, helloooo) and to-do lists are totally not my scene, if such a scene even exists. No, this list is a top ten-style countdown about the hard-hitting issues, like which mash-ups are the best ever.

This week, as a partner to The Ten Types of Guys at the Party, I’ve decided to include the female version. All in good fun, ladies! Who am I missing?

10. The Diva.
This girl is at the party, but she is DEFINITELY not trying to party. Pouting with her manicured fingers and heavily lined eyes glued to her cell, Diva will only speak to her tight-knit group of friends dressed in very similar outfits. She will not partake in any of the drinking games, she will not hook up with any guys and she will roll her eyes at those who do. Then she will leave an hour later to go off somewhere “cooler,” “more mature,” and just worthy of her time. 

9. The “Innocent” one
Dressed conservatively and drinking a microbrew or weak cocktail, this doll-faced darling looks like she’d rather be holed up in the library than at this very party. Wrong. She goes from “virgin” to skank in 3.5 drinks and will hook up with your boyfriend and cry about it later. Beware of the victim-playing. This girl is faker than her “leather” shoes and has run through more guys than Paris Hilton. Read More »

I always love coming back from break and seeing all my friends. But even though I can’t wait to see certain people, I will do my best to avoid these five “friends “who seem to appear ever year.

The Unnaturally Tan One

While I sat at home watching Full House marathons curled up under my brand-new Snuggie, this person sat on Caribbean beaches for the entire break. While my legs are streaked shades of orange from drugstore tanners, she is glowing with a tan that seems to defy her race. As if I wasn’t already feeling like Casper’s paler cousin, standing next to her makes me feel downright clinically albino.

The Reccesion-Proof One

This holiday season started with my parents interrupting all my wish-list ramblings with words like “recession,” and “depression.” My wants went from an iPhone to a few new Chap Sticks and a (store brand) chocolate bar. So it’s even more un-fun this year to watch this friend unpack all of her new things: an entirely new wardrobe that matches her Blackberry Storm that she can play with while watching her new flat screen. She’s offering to share her new boots and all I can give her in exchange is some relief for her chapped lips.

The Debbie Downer One

My break wasn’t very exciting but I don’t have any legitimate complaints. But she does. A simple, “how was your break” turns into a two-hour impromptu therapy session while she goes on and on about everything from her mom getting laid off to her dog getting hit by a car. While at first I can awkwardly pat her back and offer my condolences, it gets increasingly less easy as she talks about her Christmas tree burning down, the loss of her lucky penny, and her cat’s unhealthy addiction to alcohol. Read More »

The time has come for someone to say something.  The madness has to stop.  What madness am I talking about?  Those effing Allstate Commercials. You know, the ones that make you afraid to do anything?  The ones that have you scared to even look at your car for fear of instant bad luck or even death?  Yeah.  Those.

I’m not sure which Allstate bigwig hired Debbie Downer as their ad executive, but whoever decided depressing people into buying insurance was a good idea should be punched in the eye.

Below are a few of the offending commercials we found on YouTube.  Not surprisingly, most of the worst ones did not show up.  This is probably because Allstate knows they’re being f*cktards.

Read More »

Party poopers have been around since the invention of cake. Even at your seventh birthday party I can bet you had a few of em’. They were the kids that stuck their hands in your cake and popped your balloons. They were the children that took all the piñata candy and whined that you got presents and they didn’t.

These kids have since grown up, but have still not grown out of their party pooping ways. Here are a few classic examples of people to keep off the guest list at your next soiree.

- The Drunk Dialer: Everyone makes drunk dials. They are often regrettable, foolish mistakes that we wish we could take back; but for some people, one or two are not enough. Some people seriously spend an entire party going through their phone book; calling exes, third cousins and coworkers. Not only are they loud and obnoxious on the phone, but they also seem to think everyone shares their enthusiasm for calling their kindergarten best friend and will shout, “OMG guys! You should totally talk to Ed too!” Parties are not the time for forty drunk dials, save it for the walk home.

- The Rule Snubber: Sure, some rules are meant to be broken, but who likes to play games with people that selfishly snub all of them? Ever played quarters with someone that grabs everyone else’s coins when they are losing? How about someone who keeps drawing cards in Kings until they get one they like? Nobody likes someone that cheats in beruit or flip-cup. Cheaters are only funny for about a minute- Play the game right or don’t play at all! Read More »

Ah my dream guy, he is tall, dark, handsome, sweet, sincere, funny, and the list goes on until he is well, perfect. (Note: Not the guy to the right.)

I know, I know, there is no such thing as the “perfect” guy (so says my mother) but there is nothing wrong with having a list of qualities (doesn’t pick his nose, even when I am not looking, will rub my shoulders at the snap of my fingers) that I want in a potential boyfriend right? Right.

But after reading this article in the NYT, I have started to realize that while focusing so much on the type of guy I DO want (Has Jake Gyllenhaal broken up with Reese yet?!) perhaps I haven’t realized that there are certain types I DON’T. Things that maybe weren’t even a blip on my guy-dar and if not heeded could end up blowing up in my face.

So here it is ladies: The Guys Not Worth Taking, Dating, Marrying and the like:

Never date a dude who has no friends. At first, this rule seems a bit odd- if he has no friends, he will be close to me and only me! How wonderfully fantastic!! That is until you realize… no friends means the guy is unable to be intimate or close to anyone… yes, even you.

Besides, that means you will always feel guilty leaving him alone and friendless on a girls night out. Read More »

The Secret (which I happen to believe in…most of the time) says “What you think about, you bring about” and I’ve really been thinking about a new phone and a major raise and those have yet to show up on my doorstep. (but positivity is key so I will listen to Journey and not stop believing)

But, when it comes to Project Runway? Some may call it coincidence that last week I was ranting that Chris got kicked off only to be brought back this week.

I call it the Law of Attraction working its magic.

Either way, I am oh-so happy that this teddy-bear of a fashion designer wannabe was brought back on the show. Yes it’s tragic that Jack left due to his HIV, but I heart Chris and was nervous the only way I would see that smush of a guy again would be on Celebrity Fit Club.

And while his design was absolutely awful, dude had to stay up all night to finish it.

On another note, I would venture to say that last night was the first time in all seasons of PR that we got to see that in fact, Tim Gunn does have a bit of a personality. He even cracked a few dirty jokes (gasp!) proving to us common folk that no matter how hard he tries to emit the “I will NEVER use public restrooms- heaven forbid I put my pin-stripe suit through that kind of filth” attitude, he is just the same as the hoi polloi.

There weren’t many other surprises in last nights show. Ricky cried (shocker) and wore that awful hat again, Jillian still talked with less excitement than Debbie Downer even when she was claming to be elated/overjoyed/happier than she’s ever been and Elisa… yes, she is still weird. Read More »

You were attached at the hip. You were not only BFF’s, but bffaeaeae’s. (and we all know how major that is) You did everything together, from stalking your 6th grade crushes via Facebook to buying the same top (different colors, obviously!) at Urban Outfitters.

But the keyword here is “were”. Now, you just can’t stand her. Sure life was great when you were braiding each others hair and playing Pretty Pretty Princess, but now? You would rather be sitting in your freshman year Geog. lecture (you know, where you had the professor who spit so much you needed to wear a raincoat to class?) than spend a minute with her.

Everyone has “that friend” the one where you either feel you just don’t have anything in common anymore (her hobbies include, shopping and wait what was the other one? Oh yea, shopping. While you like to think of yourself as a more “worldly” person, you cultured person, you.)

Or perhaps she has become that friend who only talks about herself. Either way, if she was a he, this would be the part where you would say “ Peace out homeboy I’m just not that into you” (or more nicely put… “I think we should see other people”). But how do you do that with a friend, let alone someone who still thinks of you as her future maid of honor? Read More »

Last Saturday in Manhattan, I saw every costume imaginable. Swarms of bees, a duo from the Great Gatsby, a Pharaoh, Cat Woman, Sponge Bob, even a seriously drunk Teletubby. Everyone came out to play.But the best costume of the night went to the super skinny hipster boy standing right near my L train exit on Bedford. He was about as authentic as an Amy Winehouse imposter can be: short shorts, ratty white tank, beehive and thick black eyeliner. He was unmistakable replica. And it probably only cost him the price of a black wig.

If you’re broke or lazy or broke AND lazy (like me!) Halloween is more of an inconvenience than it is a good time. So instead of being Debbie Downer (hey, costume idea!) by not dressing up, here are some cheap ideas that are easy to put together on the fly.

Like say tonight… or tomorrow. Read More »