When I was little, I used to grab those big light pink seashells and press them against my right ear. I would close my eyes and hear the soft hums of the ocean. After a few moments, I would look up in the sky and wonder how on EARTH the ocean could fit into one little shell. What forces were allowing one of the biggest things on earth to speak through a pretty oceanic form of calcium??? How DID the ocean DO that??

I wish life was still that simple. Or not simple, whatever.

Now when I listen to a shell, I laugh silently inside – unable to go to the place where I was so long ago. Little, unemployed and…sheltered. After moments of pressing the shell so hard against my ear, it started to itch – I realized I was 23 years old and listening to shells in my little cousin’s bedroom during a wedding shower…

Anyway, I was extremely inspired by my shell discovery. I’ve been getting into a bad habit lately of being unable to go past what I think I’m capable of. Let me explain. When I was in college, I was the shell. Ok, when you stop laughing and snorting snot all over your keyboard, please keep reading. Read More »

I’m going to say what everyone is thinking. Ludacris is a modern day Shakespeare. Yeah, I said it, someone had to. If you don’t know every word to “Roll Out (My Business)” then I’m not sure you can be considered an American.

What could be better than a modern day Shakespeare? Pair him with today’s JFK or some other awesome leader of yesteryear. That of course, is Barack “Yeah I did coke, so what?!” Obama. Luda plus Obama? It’s like Batman and Robin, peanut butter and jelly, Paris and Nicole, boxed wine and passing out on a sidewalk! They just make sense together.

Naturally I was psyched when Barack and Luda first met up to talk about AIDS, empowering the youth or bling. My hopes were built up by a conversation that I could only assume they had.

Ludacris: YOU’S A HOOOO, OHHHHH!

Barack: Together… we can change America, Ludacris.

Ludacris: Yeah man, you’s going for that number one spot.

Barack: I want you, to be… my running mate.

Ludacris: YEAHHH Baby. Hells YES we CAN OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! LUDA! YEPPP! Read More »