I hope this report isn’t true. Not because I have any kind of personal connection to Blohan (my love for her sunk with her weight and disappeared completely after one two many bitchy interviews), but because if it is true, LL is officially lost and gone forever.

Star Magazine (not known for it’s hard hitting reporting) is claiming LiLo used Whip-its in rehab, mixing them with cold medicine and staying high until she was caught.

“At first, the counselors couldn’t figure out how she was getting high” Star repots, “but then they found the cold medicine and whippit containers under Lindsay’s bed. Lindsay admitted to using the stuff in group counseling meetings and said she was sorry.”

For those of you who didn’t grow up in middle class suburbia, Whip-its are nitrous oxide canisters that are commonly used for cooking and baking purposes. According to the Urban Dictionary, It is also the act of inhaling the nitrous oxide out of normal, household products like whipped cream cans. Read More »

She said no to rehab. And apparently also to food.

I’m not Amy Winehouse’s biggest fan. Not because I don’t think she’s talented—I do—I just don’t get her. I don’t get anyone who’s famous and then misses gigs and seems genuinely uninterested in the fans who gave them that fame. She’s a little too weird for me. But I figured the baby-who-hasn’t-eaten-for-weeks look and her huge hair was a thing she had cultivated for a while, a trademark. Part of her essence.

I figured wrong.

It seems like Ms. Winehouse was completely normal looking a few years ago. Buxom, smiling, basically tattoo free, and clean. She looked cute and friendly. Well fed. In no need of rehab.

Then something happened. Not being a Winehouse scholar, I have no idea what that something was. Massive amounts of drugs? Read More »

Who knew Lindsay Lohan could fuel a fashion trend by being photographed destitute in the back of her Mercedes? Girl’s got pull.

Ever since that infamous pre – rehab photo of Lilo was taken, American Apparel’s Flex Fleece Salt ‘n’ Pepper Hoodie has been selling like crazy.

Apparently, trend slaves across the country are unconditionally dedicated to Lindsay and support her style regardless of her emotional/physical state of duress.

But hell, I’ll jump on the wagon for this trend. In fact, I already have. I own that hoodie in like, seventeen colors.

It’s amazing — so comfortable, durable hood, sturdy zipper, and roomy pockets to hold all your pills. I think this is the best look to surface in a while (am I the only one who can’t stand that freaking bubble hem??).

Overdosing and going to rehab may not exactly conjure images of high fashion and fun, but at least you get to wear comfy clothes. Looking strung – out has never looked so good.

A shocking new drug epidemic has emerged in Texas. Since 2005, 21 Dallas – area teens have overdosed on “cheese heroin,” a potent mixture of black tar heroin and Tylenol PM. The highly dangerous combination of downers is highly accessible and frighteningly cheap. In Dallas, where a gram of cheese heroin sells for $10 (a hit can be as little as $2), the drug has become as ubiquitous as pot. The feds are all up in arms about the lure of the cheese spreading to other states.

The underground drug world never ceases to amaze me. What will they come up with next? Milkshake crack? Thank God I’m lactose – intolerant.

To read the whole story, click here.

It’s official. The little heiress is heading back to the slammer. *Hahahahaha* (evil sounding laugh). I just hate her. And I’m happy that she’s behind bars. She left the court weeping and screaming “Mom.” Guess you shouldn’t have pissed off that judge, princess.

And even though she was in there for less than three days, in court time that appears to count as five days? That seems a little off to me, but I guess she won’t be there for that much longer. I’m still getting updates from CNN who is covering the story live—which makes me slightly ill. The anchors actually look disgusted with themselves too.

All I can really say about this whole thing with Paris is—I don’t really care. I mean, I do in a way. She was drunk driving, and that officially kills people. And then she stuck her nose up at the law and decided it was OK to violate probation. I’m sorry, she didn’t know she wasn’t allowed to drive… my ass. Read More »

All my favorite people — Lindsay, Britney, Nicole, even Marc Jacobs!– seem to be going or have gone to rehab. My question is: When can I go?? From what I’m reading these days, rehab is like the new hot club you have to wait an hour on line to get into, only to be rejected at the door because you’re not cool or famous enough.

I’m assuming normal folk like you and me go to rehab all the time, it’s just not reported in the NY Post. I was generally brought up to think that rehab was a place I should not aspire to go to. And I’ll admit, even though I know James Frey was a big faker with A Million Little Pieces, I still drank seltzer with lime for a month after reading it whenever I went out — my plebeian version of rehab.

Nevertheless, rehab doesn’t seem to be doing these celebs any good — the process has become a ruse for attaining health and avoiding jail time. Read More »

Yes, the rumors are true and here are the pictures to prove it. According to Hollywoodbackwash.com, in addition to Ms. Lohan’s love for the White Lady, she is reportedly quite accomplished in the art of Star F@#$ing. Shortly after these pictures were taken, Lindsay is said to have rattled off a list of her Hollywood sexual conquests that include James Blunt, Jude Law, Calum Best, Joaquin Phoenix, Benicio Del Toro, Jared Leto and James Franco. So many boys, so many drugs, so little time… to blow them all. It is a shame acting is not an excessive habit for the young starlet. If it were, she just might be good at it.

More photos Read More »

Keith, we have brought you here to let you know that we love you and are worried about you. We will spare you the “drugs are bad…mmmkaaayyy” speech, but your issues are much larger than your choice of nasal recreations.

Your Dad’s ashes? Really? You must be really strung out when that seems like a good idea. Don’t get us wrong – this definitely adds you to the list of hardcore rockers from now until eternity – but there are many other ways you could have chosen to celebrate the life of Bert Richards. When my dog died, I made a little collage of pictures of us together – a tribute if you will. Keith, try Picasa from Google and let your creative juices flow.

Seriously though, you need to take it down a notch. You in your 60′s and you look like Death is your roady – simma-down-now Keith simma-down.