Want to know what song is playing on the radio? There’s an app for that.
Want to mix some fruity cocktails by the pool? There’s an app for that.
Wanna get your rocks off with the same electronic you use for making phone calls? There’s an app for that.

The iPhone has an application for everything, and getting fat is no exception. Because Americans weren’t doing a good enough job of porking up on their own, tons of companies are developing programs making it even easier to access the fat. Ironic, considering all the obese people complaining that their pudgy fingers were too big for the keyboard.

You looking to pack on some poundage? Looks like you need an iFat iPhone. Read More »

This week may have been the best week ever.  For starters, people celebrated 4/20 on Monday.  Tuesday (probably the best day ever) was both Iced Coffee Day at Dunkin Donuts® AND Free Scoop Day at Ben and Jerry’s®.  Plus, on Wednesday, we celebrated Earth Day!  We learned why college students should go green, which is easier than you’d think.  And now we can keep the celebration going this weekend with an eco-friendly gathering, where we will have to lay off the booze so as not to become the drunk girl.

Also, this week was the first week that, at least for a lot of the country, it actually felt like spring—which makes us (and squirrels) want to party!  So throw on that new organic cotton sundress, paint your nails hot pink, and have fun!  Plus, we all know that spring puts us in a sexy mood (you’re probably stalking your crush’s Facebook page while you read this, right?), and now we know exactly how to find that new guy.

With all the fun we’ve been having this week, it’s going to be hard to get back to writing that paper we’ve been putting off. But we must, or we may regret it later.

How’s that free ice cream treating you? What, you didn’t know it was Free Cone Day at Ben & Jerry’s? Oh, I’m sure you knew about Iced Coffee Day at Dunkin Donuts then? No? Well, you need to get on that because today just might be the best day ever!

The only thing that would make today any better would be if today was Friday, and the last day of classes, and maybe if I had a hot date tonight. Okay, so today could be better, but this ice cream and coffee certainly aren’t hurting my mood. Honestly, anytime someone wants to give me free or discounted stuff I’m going to be incredibly happy.

In fact, my perfect day would revolve around freebies.  My perfect day would start with my Dunkin Donuts coffee and a free makeover at Sephora, where  they would send me away with a bag of free makeup and spa goodies. Then I’d swing over to Ihop for some free pancakes, served to me by the hottest waiter Ihop has to offer. You know what? Let’s just say Zac Efron will serve me my short stack. And he will be shirtless. I know shirtless isn’t the most sanitary condition for the food industry, but he’s just so damn pretty, I don’t even care. Read More »

Mardi Gras is officially over tomorrow, so put your shirts down, drop those beads and celebrate the best day ever: Fat Tuesday!  I like to think of every Tuesday (or every day, for that matter) as Fat Tuesday, so I’m more than ready to celebrate.

A day devoted to all culinary indulgences? Sign. me. up.

Care to join me? Well, you can start by getting a free stack o’ pancakes at IHOP (much love to you, IHOP!), then move onto some of my favorite fatty indulgences. Click on the pics to find out where you can get your hands on such delicious celebratory snacks.

What are your favorite Fat Tuesday treats? Read More »

While some of us may be angry at the dismal state of the job market (Macy’s recently laid of 7,000 workers!), the foreclosures, the lay offs etc., we can thank our failing economy for at least one good thing: a little treat called the Starbucks value meal.

That’s right ladies; no more splurging on a non-fat-no-whip-whipped-soy-mocha-latte.

Starbucks, notoriously quipped “fourbucks” for its outrageous coffee prices, seems to be suffering just like the rest of the country. Apparently people don’t feel like forking over $6 for a beverage when they aren’t sure they’ll have a job tomorrow.

In an attempt to keep up with the Dunkins (Starbucks’ biggest competition) and reel those coffee addicts back in, Starbucks is slashing prices and offering some tasty (and cheap) breakfast pairings.  Cheap Starbucks?! Looks like the recession just got a little silver lining.

Let’s break it down: a Dunkin Donuts medium drip coffee and egg white sandwich costs only $1.99. If Starbucks manages to match those prices and throw in some of those little brownie cookie things, I’m sold. And happy. And totally lovin’ the recession.

What can I say? Coffee is my crack. Cheap coffee is my…cheap crack?

While there aren’t many details that have been released, more information should be available by the end of the week. Personally, my Monday morning classes would be so much more enjoyable with some cheap coffee paired with something delicious, so the sooner the better, Starbucks.

And, while you’re at it, a dollar menu wouldn’t be a bad idea either!

This semester, I am one of those suckers whose last final falls on the very last day of exam period. Adding to the pain is the fact that it is an exam in statistics, a subject I both loathe and am terrible at. On the midterm I got every answer wrong, but my compassionate TA gave me points for trying.

The fear of my impending final failure sent me scurrying to the library for some quality study time and I have yet to leave (I’m considering having my mail addressed here). Sixteen hours straight in the library and you’re bound to start feeling loopy. In the search for something to concentrate on other than the chi-squared test, you also might start noticing some weird things going on…

Because people are so consumed with work and are therefore also residing in the library, they’ve moved their entire lives into their tiny study space: private phone calls, private conversations, eating habits that should be private (anchovies on top of pizza—blech). I’ve witnessed relationship mini-dramas in the stacks, stumbled across a couple taking a creative study break, and some surreptitious flask sippage. Alchol and sleep deprivation combined with a certain amount of desperation will lead to some interesting things, such as the three recent events that I consider evidence of what too much studying does to the college student’s brain. Read More »

I was home for Fall Break for four days, and I realized that maybe adapting to college was easier than I expected. When I entered my house Friday night, I didn’t see a place where I had numerous study sessions, birthday parties and mental health days. I saw a place to do laundry for free, watch some mindless television and sleep for awhile.

Sure, it was nice to be home. But I kept feeling like I had to go back to school, like this was more of a temporary sleepover than a homecoming. While the weekend kept me busy from noticing that my house was not exactly home, it also uncovered a new strangeness which college created—meeting up with high school friends.

Most of my high school friends, all of whom I have known for years, go to college within two hours of my hometown. So when a few of us come home for the weekend, we all come home for the weekend. And while I loved being around people who never need an explanation for my random songs or not-funny jokes, it was also startling to see how just a few months have changed us.

I left my friends for the entire summer, and I noticed little change when I came back. But now my friends are not just sitting around their houses or working at the local Dunkin’ Donuts; they’re making friends, testing their boundaries and (some of them) are becoming people who I never would have talked to in high school. When it’s just the few of us watching a movie or walking around town, I can’t entirely ignore the college sweatshirts, new belly-button rings and anecdotes starring new best friends. I can’t pretend that this is last June, when we all just graduated and were ready for something new. Read More »

We always hear about the obesity epidemic in America: It’s a major issue! People are dying! Fat people are evil! While it’s true that being overweight can lead to serious health problems, it is not true that being overweight automatically means being unhealthy.

Which explains the new “Fat Acceptance” movement that is spreading across the country. Activists and supporters of this movement are screaming from the rooftops that being fat is OK, and as long as people are making good choices to support a healthy lifestyle it should not matter what size pants they wear.

And I totally concur. I cannot tell you how sick I am of salads, fad diets and feeling guilty when I want a Potbelly Oreo Shake so badly I could punch someone. So, you know what? I’m joining this movement and I urge you to do the same. Stop kicking yourself for enjoying a hot dog at your football tailgate. Stop crying after a late night pizza binge.

Put down that carrot and join me in embracing ourselves, no matter what size we are. And what is the best way to do that? By enjoying some of life’s most delectable treats. Come on, it’s OK; fat is in! Read More »

Hey everyone! It’s Friday! It’s gonna be such a great day! I can feel it! I’d like to give a special shout out to the crazy guy I met this morning as I walked into work with the rest of the herd of New Yorkers! You were really cool, Crazy Guy! You shouted “F*CK” as loud as you possibly could behind me, and after jumping out of my skin, I made the silly mistake of looking back — just in case you were a person who had fallen and was in need of help.

But guess what? You didn’t need help! You hadn’t fallen! You were just crazy! And because I looked back, you decided to take your special brand of insane and run up to my ear and scream “F*CK” again as loud as humanly possible. I mean, I have never heard someone yell that loud before – in my ear no less! I thought I was going to have a heart attack and go deaf!

So special shout out to you, Crazy Insane F*ck Shouting guy! You really made my morning, and even made me spill my Dunkin Donuts coffee all over my leg in sheer terrified surprise. LOVE!

“What Rachel Ray does to food, Hitler did to Poland…she’s like a hypnotist; ‘everything’s okay, you’re eating just fine, throw some cheese on it and you’ll be fine’” — Anthony Bourdain.

[Initially, we thought today was Rachel Ray's birthday.  Obviously, one of us was taking drugs or something, because her birthday was actually August 25.  In any case, we still stand behind this article, because birthday or not, she's still probably tied SOMEHOW to Beelzebub]

In case you’re not familiar with her 30-minute brand of world domination, here are some reasons why Rachel Ray always has a first class ticket to fire and brimstone.

1) Her Voice: It sounds as though she smokes 3 packs a day, unfiltered. Except she rolls her own and crumbles glass and charcoal into that sh*t. We only know her for 30 minutes, why is her voice like that? Hopefully it’s from being really peppy and not screaming like a banshee at her sous-chefs all day.

2) Too perfect at making 30 Minute Meals: There is something fishy about her innate ability to time meals so that she always has time to take two or three bites. Something almost…satanic. A power so cosmic, every time she suggests her meal idea, I think ‘ok bitch, today’s the day you aren’t getting to eat what you make!’ but the stars somehow align and Ray gets two or three bites while laughing maniacally about how easy it was. Portobello burgers in 30 minutes my ass; devil burgers with a side of devil. Read More »