Ever feel like everyone around you is suddenly coupling up and you’re the only single person left? Well, that’s how Demi Moore and Katy Perry must feel around Hollywood right about now, because waaaay too many people got engagement rings for Christmas this past year. Was there some kind of amazing sale on diamonds or something? Did everyone just completely blank out on original gift ideas and just decided to go for the gift that keeps on giving—as in once you give someone that particular piece of jewelry, you also have to give them a wedding, a honeymoon, and the rest of your life?!?

Here are all the celebrities who got engaged over the holiday season. In other words, people who seriously thought the world would end once 2012 began, wanted to make some amazing love before their last days on earth, and knew that popping the question to their significant other would seal the deal. And now they have to follow through and actually get married.

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What’d you get for Christmas that’s better than an engagement ring?? I’m more than happy with my iPad, thanks.

Ashley is a UC San Diego grad who is holding on way too tightly to a potential career in magazines and goes to Vegas all too often. She’s fascinated with celebrities and strawberry beer and doubles as a pathological texter/emailer/blogger. Feed the addiction with tweets @cashleelee. Thanks in advance.

I cannot express how excited I am for the new Muppet movie coming out on November 23rd. What’s even more exciting is that Jason Segel co-wrote it and is starring along side our favorite furry characters. Along with the regular trailers, The Muppets have taken it upon themselves to do parody movie trailers based on popular films as well. They’re hilarious. Muppet madness has taken over Hollywood, and I can’t wait for it to take over my hometown over Thanksgiving break. You better believe I’ll see it more than once. It’s going to be awesome.

If you’re not familiar with the Muppets well, shame on you. It’s classic! However, this time they’re reuniting to save their old theater. The old gang is back together along side Jason Segel, Amy Adams, Chris Cooper, and Rashida Jones. You should definitely hit this one up as soon as it comes out. Without further adieu, let’s meet the main Muppets!

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I Love You, Man was funny (duh).  It made me laugh till I peed a little and also reaffirmed my love for Jason Segel. Any man who can make fun of man Uggs but still pull them off gets bumped up on my list. For real. (P.S. Jason, I’m a NJG (Nice Jewish Girl); call me. My mom makes a mean matzo ball soup. True story.)

But anyways, I digress. More than Paul Rudd’s perfect delivery of awkwardness, my major crush on Jason Segel, and the screenplay stealing words right out own personal daily vernacular (hellllllo, I’ve been saying Totes Magotes since I came out of the womb… not that I am proud of it), there was actually something thought provoking about this movie (and, no, I’m not talking about the genius that was the random made up words… Jobin? Hilarious).

What I realized was that this movie would NEVER fly if the tables were turned.

Why is it that a man can be a ‘girlfriend’ guy without ANY friends of his own and not only is it so acceptable that  we can turn it into a movie that makes you pee in your pants, but also leaves women everywhere thinking, “Aw, how cute, I wish I had a fiancé JUST like Paul Rudd”? Fact is, if it was about some chick who just always happened to be a ‘boyfriend’ girl with no girlfriends or a maid of honor, guys would say she’s batsh*t insane and girls wouldn’t feel sorry for her. We would go around saying she pushed us all away and alienated herself  by being so clingy with her boyfriend that she even chose to see the SATC movie with him over us. Ruuude.

We’ve talked about it right here on this very site:
Single Girl has tons of friends.
Girl gets boyfriend.
Girl and boyfriend spend every minute together, start dressing alike and talking to each other in puppy love speak (vomit).
Boy learn what Manolo’s are.
Girl no longer has any friends.
Girl gets engaged and no one feels sorry that she has no friends left.

So why is it with a dude it all of a sudden becomes a perfect topic for funnyman fodder?  I’ve seen the real man version of Paul Rudd’s character and it really isn’t that funny or sweet; it’s actually sort of pathetic. But in this case I’m supposed to root for him and feel sorry for him and believe that he can make a guy best friend in like 2 hours who thinks he is a super cool at not at all awkward dude? Come on.

Don’t get me wrong – I peed my pants and aw’ed my way through this entire movie (and really, really fell in love with Mr. Segel-Ugg-man) but I did sorta feel like a hypocrite while I did so.

If this movie was about your ex-best friend, who is now your ex-BFF because she gave up her weekly mani-pedi session with you to cuddle with her boy, you wouldn’t be lining up to see the flick and readily quoting one-liners from it on your Facebook status as we speak. You’d be talking sh*t about her to your other friends and venting to anyone who will listen that you would never ditch your friends for a dude.

You know I’m right.
Totes magotes.

[This post is courtesy of our gal pal, Marie Claire.]

With Amy Poehler’s new sitcom, Parks and Recreation,MC premiering this month, and Tina Fey ruling Hollywood from atop a pile of Emmys, funny women are having a moment.  rounds up the pioneers, the visionaries, and the chemically imbalanced to talk about how we got here.

Can a pretty girl be funny?
MARGARET CHO (Lifetime’s upcoming Drop Dead Diva): I remember seeing beautiful girls do stand-up, and it was a disaster every time. Not only were people not gonna listen to you because you’re a woman, if you’re good-looking, people really don’t want to listen to you.

SUSIE ESSMAN (Curb Your Enthusiasm): I’ve had to give some young female comics advice about what they’re wearing. Like, you can’t wear something too provocative — it’s too confusing to the men in the audience. They don’t know if they wanna f**k you or laugh at you.

JOAN RIVERS (comedian): Phyllis Diller used to dress like a fool. Totie Fields was a big fat woman. In the beginning, women comedians were all grotesque in one way or another.

PHYLLIS DILLER (comedian): When I started, I had a broken nose, my teeth were crooked, and I was very skinny. And you know what? It all helped.

ESSMAN: I always wondered if Roseanne would have been accepted by the country, being as strong as she was, if she weren’t fat. Lucy was beautiful. But she played dumb, dumb, dumb.

SUZANNE SOMERS (Three’s Company): [When I was fired from Three’s Company], a producer said to the ABC people, “She’s a blonde. I trained her, I’ll train another one,” like I was some sort of seal … [But] a comedy is musical. It took me two years to understand the rhythm, the beat, the timing, but once I heard the music, oh, my God, I so got it.

Read the rest at Marie Claire.

Wrong. All wrong. Wrong movie, wrong time, wrong situation. In all fairness, I kinda knew what was coming, having heard about the book well before the movie was even in the works. I didn’t like the idea of it then, but somehow between two weeks ago and last Friday, I decided that I needed to see the movie with the bestie as a girls’ night out scenario. Here’s why I advise that everyone without ironclad self-esteem skip the movie, at least until you can see it in the comfort of your home.

1. If you’re into escapism through upbeat movies, this is not the one for you. After two hours of ‘He Just Not That Into You’, not a single one of the main characters’ plot-lines even resembled positive. I was literally crawling out of my seat trying to salvage the remainder of a happy evening as commitments combusted, relationships crumbled, and ruthless reality checks conspired to sink the Girls’ Night. The only reason I made it through is because I had to see if the writers would actually throw the audience a bone and make a happy ending.

2. The movie is ruthless in its portrayal of female stereotypes. “He’s Just Not That Into You” isn’t just a depressing chick flick, it’s the anti-chick flick. Throughout the entire movie, I kept asking myself, “Do I actually do that? Am I that crazy?” The answer, according to “He’s Just Not That Into You,” is yes. We are all clingy, insane, insecure, naive, trusting idiots, who drive away our boyfriends and potential bfs by being like that. I don’t know about you, but movies that continuously reiterate that I’m completely psycho and clingy tend to turn me off at about the 60 minute mark.

3. Your faith in committed relationships will die a horrible death in the two hour and fifteen minute love massacre. After two hours of infidelity, dating disasters, and misguided love, there was not a girl in the theater who had faith in her relationship, or ability to secure one. Those of us who were single experienced what almost came off as anti-relationship propaganda (“If you do this, this, or this, your ovaries can kiss their chance at motherhood goodbye!”), and were left doubting every simple sentence we had ever spoken to the male gender. My friend, who has been in a committed relationship for the better part of a year and a half, had started to wonder if her boyfriend could have been cheating on her. The movie had a sinister talent for slipping insecurity into our minds, and then mocking us for being insecure.

4. There are better things to do on weeknights than going to a movie that strips down your character and makes fun of what it finds there. The movie seriously killed the happy, estrogen-filled mood of the evening, and left the two of us as quaking, emotional maniacs. I can honestly say that except for when I saw “Lord of the Rings” as a twelve year old, and was terrified by the Orcs, I have never wanted to leave a movie so fast (30 minutes in). Save your seven bucks for dollar pitchers downtown, not “He’s Just Not That Into You.”

5. The movie is more suitable as a look into Gender Studies than a romantic dramedy. I’ve had more laughs in my College Algebra class than this movie. If you do go, look at it as a gender wars type of thing, not something that will make you feel cheery and secure by the last minute happy ending. (It was a happy ending, it was just a too little-too late type of thing.) The movie is accurate in its portrayal of how men and women want different things out of life, and the plot turnaround towards the end was satisfying, but ultimately not enough to recover from the first two hours. It had the effect of a doctor suddenly giving you anaesthesia after your surgery already happened, with a “Look what I just found!” air.

Yep, forget the wacko driving-with-your- infant-son-dangling-from- the-driver’s- seat incident, Ms. Spears is a drool-worthy role model again. If you happen to have access to the internet (which I’m assuming you do, if you’re reading this), you can’t be more than a mouse click away from a Britney love fest. Today, her newest album, Circus, was leaked online just one week before its official release, and the world is abuzz with Brit.

How does the album fare? As far as pop records go, Circus ain’t too shabby. We’ve all heard the tour-de-force “Womanizer,” and the new single “If U Seek Amy” (is she referring to Ms. Winehouse? If Britney’s looking for her, she need look no further than a London crack den) is as gritty and caustic as I imagine Ms. Spears would be after a night of boozing. But a lame vehicle for singles (and moolah) this isn’t: the song “My Baby” perked my ears right up. Could Britney–gasp– actually be crooning? Her voice shines through clearly and tenderly on what is a sweet ode to her children.

I’m still confused at how Brit Brit has achieved her massive reinvention. I mean, check her out on the cover of Rolling Stone for godsakes! As she says in the opening to the title track, “There are two kinds of people in this world: entertainers and observers.” If baffling the public counts as entertainment, then Brit, baby, you’re a star.

Check out her album, Circus, on Imeem.com

His Place

Pro: You don’t have to worry about the pile of dirty laundry on your bedroom floor.

Con: You have no idea if he has to worry about the pile of dirty laundry on his bedroom floor.

Your Place

Pro: You can easily access your toothbrush and contact lens solution.

Con: He can easily access all of the secrets of your medicine cabinet.

His Place

Pro: You don’t have to worry about waking up/sexiling your roommate.

Con: You have to worry about his roommates.

Your Place

Pro: You won’t have to take a walk of shame in the morning.

Con: You risk your entire floor seeing him leave your room.

His Place

Pro: You can sidestep the awkward morning-after moment by creeping out of the room.

Con: If he doesn’t live within walking distance, you’re going to have to rouse him for a potentially awkward drive home.

Your Place

Pro: You can sleep better in your own bed.

Con: You have to wait for him to wake up, and then politely kick him out the next morning.

His Place

Pro: He has to entertain you with the facade of the pre-hook-up movie and a few icebreaking drinks.

Con: He might NOT entertain you with the facade of the pre-hook-up movie and a few icebreaking drinks.

Your Place

Pro: You know the layout, so you won’t bump into the wall on the way to the bathroom, or accidentally stumble into his roommate’s room.

Con: Now he knows where you live.

Depending on the guy you’re with, either scenario is win or lose. If your place is closer and neither of you are under the driving limit, it’s definitely worth hitting up your own place, no matter how many pairs of dirty underwear you have strewn throughout your room. If you share a bunkbed with another girl, it’s obvious that you should be scouting out a different place to hook up. And if you’re not comfortable letting him know where you live, or being brought to an unfamiliar place, perhaps it’s in your best interest to exchange numbers and continue your tryst soberly, and in daylight.

We spent so much time checking out the fashion from last night’s Emmy Awards that we almost forgot about da boys. And boy did they look goooooood.

There were the usual drool-worthy dudes – John Stewart, David Boreanaz, Adrien Grenier, Patrick Dempsey, (and hottie newcomer John Hamm) – and then there were the surprises. The guys who were always so-so, but somehow looked so good last night that we wanted to hump the flat screen.

My favorite: Jeremy Piven.

Second Best: Josh (normally nerdy) Groban.

I don’t know if it was Piven’s 5 o’clock shadow or Groban’s charming little smile, but these guys looked really f–ing good. Better than the rest. Yes, even John Krasinski.

Which sexy celeb did you prefer?

But our 12-year-old sister might not understand that materialistic banter and wildly frequent sex is the making of entertainment. Our 12-year-old sister might think those are really things to aspire to. And we wouldn’t want that.

So why, may I ask, has HarperCollins asked Candace Bushnell to pen a new seires of Young Adult novels? Are The Carrie Diaries, reportedly about Carrie’s high school years, just an attempt to get a new, younger audience into SATC? Are tweens really ready for couture and an obsession with relationships that boarders on psychotic? I mean, maybe Bushnell will break the mold and write about something other than New York City, designer labels, and women chasing after men…but forgive us if we have our doubts on that one.

What do you think? If The Carrie Diaires come out, would you want the little girls you love to read it?

So, needless to say, TV wasn’t a big part of my childhood. That was fine by me; I spent my time outside and learning how to play guitar.

When I moved out and into dorms at 18, I still didn’t watch TV much. I think there was one in my dorm, but I wouldn’t have noticed either way. It just wasn’t a part of my life. But when I moved in with new roomies in a real apartment when I was 19, everything changed. Not only did we have a TV, but we had every channel (not to mention On Demand and, mmmm, DVR). I learned to love TV.

In fact, I’m watching it right now.

Since I have spent a few years getting to know the ins and out of this tube and the entertainment that it so benevolently offers me, I have noticed that there are some very bad people on TV. And I love lists. So, naturally, I made a list of the worst people on TV.

1. Heidi Montag. You suck. Not only have you clearly devoted your life to looking like Barbie and dating a douchier version of Ken, but you are also retardedly incompetent and talentless. Congrats, Heidi. (Note: Tied for#1 is her douchier version of Ken, Spencer Pratt. Get a job and get out of my life.)

2. Blair Waldorf. You might just be a fiction character, Blair Waldorf (like Heidi isn’t?), but your character blows. You are a very mean girl who has nothing to do with her life. The sad thing is that girls, like my current roommate, think you’re actually someone to emulate. Puke.

3. Celia Hodes. I love the show Weeds, Celia, but you are definitely not why. Your trainwreck of a character is a walking double-standard, an ache in my viewer’s side. Basically, you’re a hot mess. You’re a bad mom, a bad wife, a bad friend, a bad worker. WTF are you good at? I hate you.

4. Carlos Mencia. You are not funny. You are not funny. You are not funny. Not only are you not funny, but you’re annoying. The 15 minutes I once spent trying to get your annoying voice out of my head might have been my worst 15 minutes of my life. Thank you.

5. Ali Lohan. We don’t need another Lohan in our faces. It’s simple. And on top of that, you’re not your sister (though you sure do try). Why don’t you finish high school and then go find a life of your own?

Anyone else who makes you want to claw your eyes out? Elizabeth Hasselback? Oprah Winfrey? Alex Trebek?

[Photo from: seat42f.com]