There are many heterosexual couples that say they won’t get married until after marriage equality is achieved and same sex marriage has been legalized — Brad and Angelina are probably the first couple that comes to mind. This isn’t a decision I’d ever have to think about because, well, same sex marriage is already legal in Canada where I’m from. It’s a decision I admire, and it’s cool to see that one woman has taken the fight for equality a step further.

Yes, an openly gay Texan judge has said she won’t perform marriages until she is able to get married to a person of her choosing. This week Tonya Parker told Stonewall Democrats:

“I don’t perform marriage ceremonies because we are in a state that does not have marriage equality, and until it does, I am not going to partially apply the law to one group of people that doesn’t apply to another group of people.’ And it’s kind of oxymoronic for me to perform ceremonies that can’t be performed for me, so I’m not going to do it.”

It’s a bold move that I completely support. In Canada churches are not required to marry two members of the same sex, and I don’t think a judge should have to perform marriages when they don’t support biased legislation.

[Lead image via Lasse Kristensen/Shutterstock]

In today’s society, coming out is one of the most personal and difficult decisions a person can make. Coming out means that you are sharing, sometimes with complete strangers, a part of yourself that has been buried and hidden for a long time. It means you are acknowledging the fact that you are different (although I wish being gay wasn’t classified as “different”).

Keeping the difficulty of such a task in mind, I applaud Matt Bomer for not only coming out, but for doing so without dramatization. Instead of acknowledging that he is different than the majority of people in the world, he did exactly what everyone else would do when they accept an award: he thanked his family. While some celebrities may choose to come out through magazine covers or interviews, Bomer treated the situation like it was completely normal when he said, “I’d especially like to thank my beautiful family: Simon, Kit, Walker, Henry. Thank you for teaching me what unconditional love is. You will always be my proudest accomplishment.” I love that Bomer took a situation that easily could have been escalated into an Us Weekly cover story and came out in a way that makes him just like any other celebrity dad and partner. His speech, I hope, gives us a glimpse into a future in which being gay is no different than being straight.

Yes, Matt Bomer’s speech showed us that he is gay. However, that is not all we learned from it. As it turns out, he has children, too. While we’ve known for a while that Simon Halls (Bomer’s partner) has children through a surrogate mother, it came as a shock to find that those children also call Matt Bomer “daddy.” Some might be bothered by Bomer’s decision to wait so long to come out, but I am more bothered by the fact that he felt he had to keep an entire part of his life hidden. He has a family that he goes home to every day. Until now, he has had two completely different lives. I greatly respect the privacy of celebrities but I find it awful that we live in a society in which someone feels they have to keep their family under wraps, not because they want to keep them out of the public eye, but because they’re “different.”

It is, in every respect, Matt Bomer’s decision to keep his sexuality hidden. I don’t believe that a person should ever feel obligated to either hide or reveal such a personal aspect of their life. However, I do greatly look forward to the day that a speech like the one given by Matt Bomer is just another acceptance speech thanking his family, not a coming out speech that classifies him as “different.”

Ashley is a freshman at George Washington University and she’s majoring in Overanalyzing Situations and International Affairs. Follow her on twitter @ashleybrooks25

[Lead image via Joe Seer/Shutterstock]

A federal appeals court knocked down California’s Proposition 8 — an amendment to the state constitution that banned gay marriage. In 2008, California voters decided to restrict marriage to just a man and a woman. Now, four years later, the court has found that measure to be in violation of the equal protection rights of lesbian and gay individuals. This is big news for California, but doesn’t mean much for other states. The court was ruling on the constitutionality of Prop 8 specifically, not the restriction of gay marriage in general. And, despite the decision, gay couples still can’t get married in Cali — they’ll have to wait ’til the decision goes before a larger panel of justices. However, the debate is now only a couple steps away from the Supreme Court, which means the gay marriage issue could come before the nine almighty justices by the beginning of next year.

President Obama backed off (somewhat) on a rule that would require religious organizations to provide their employees with health insurance covering birth control. Now, groups can “opt out” of this type of coverage, as long as they offer their employees alternative healthcare options that provide contraception. This comes after weeks and weeks of criticism from religious groups that believe contraception is immoral. Maybe Obama came up with a good compromise…but still, getting birth control will require an extra step for lots of people, including students at religiously affiliated colleges.

The violence in Syria, where tens of thousands of protestors are demonstrating against the government, is getting worse and worse. Over the past year, rebels have been attempting to oust President Bashar al-Assad’s controlling government. Assad has responded with unprecedented and unrelenting violence — since the beginning of the revolution, 6,000 Syrians have died. In fact, it’s gotten so bad that on Monday, President Obama made the decision to close down the U.S. embassy in capitol Damascus, getting all American diplomats out of the chaotic country, fast. This move, which some say came way too late, demonstrates that the U.S. will no longer hold any peaceful relations with the Syrian government. Finally.

Scientists say… don’t drive stoned. A new study reveals that driving within three hours of smoking pot doubles your chance of being an accident. So, don’t do it. Duh.

In an attempt to save their troubled (understatement) economy, Greek Parliament passed a number of spending cuts on Sunday, leading to mass protests in Athens. The city was set ablaze by tens of thousands of protestors after the government passed a $4.3 billion package meant to save Greece from quickly-approaching debt default. What’s everyone’s problem? The financial strain will ultimately fall on the shoulders of the Greek population. About 45 buildings in Athens were burned out, and security forces ran out of tear gas twice. This is, ultimately, a last resort for Greece — the best among a number of unhappy options.

Pic o’ the Week

Martial Trezzini / Keystone via AP

Sometimes Europe seems glamorous and luxurious. But sometimes it seems…not so fun. Record low temperatures — some as low as minus 40 Farenheit — have killed hundreds across Europe. This pic was taken in Switzerland. I wonder how long it would take to defrost that windshield?

Cities across England turned dangerous as violent riots, spurred by the death of a black man by police, spread throughout the country. Mobs took over the streets, setting buildings and cars on fire, shattering windows, and looting stores. Things were particularly bad in London, where the Prime Minister sent 16,000 policemen on Tuesday to calm things down. It worked- the worst is over- but the cost of clean up is estimated to be in the tens of millions. Even though the riots began because of one man’s death, the social and economic inequality may have been what really heated things up. That’s an issue pretty familiar to those living in the U.S., and now, many are wondering, could the same thing happen in the states?

A  9,000 signature-strong petition got attention this week for it’s forward-thinking idea: Bert and Ernie should get married on Sesame Street. There have been rumors for a while now that the best buds are actually in a relationship, and their constant bickering is reminiscent of an old married couple. The LGBTQ activists who started the petition claim that an on-screen marriage between the two male puppets would teach acceptance and tolerance to children, but the show disagrees, insisting that such a union is impossible- “Even though they are identified as male characters and possess many human traits and characteristics (as most Sesame Street Muppets™ do), they remain puppets, and do not have a sexual orientation.” Wait… what about Kermit and Miss Piggy? You can still sign the petition here!

The 12 Congressmen who will make up the “super committee” have been announced. The group was part of the last-minute, we-must-avoid-the-implosion-of-our-economy deal to raise the debt ceiling last month. Despite their name, they’ll be searching for savings, not evil villains, though that’d be much more exciting. (Can you imagine if politicians were actually superheroes? Hello Hollywood, this is obviously a great movie idea…) To be exact, the committee, which is half Republican and half Democrat (and btw, only includes one woman and one African American- typical!), is charged with finding $1.5 trillion in savings over the next ten years. Maybe they will need super powers for that.

The main stage at the Indianapolis State Fair collapsed on Saturday night, killing 5 and injuring 40. Chaos erupted on the fairgrounds after the huge, metal structure- which was soon planned to hold the country-pop duo Sugarland- came crashing down due to a “freak gust of wind.” Visitors caught the unbelievable, horrifying event on video (here), but as a warning, it’s pretty scary and upsetting. The fair reopened this morning with a memorial service for those lost.

Warren Jeffs, the leader of the 10,000-member polygamist Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, was sentenced to life in prison on Tuesday. The jury took less than half an hour to decide that Jeffs, 55, deserved to spend the rest of his life in prison for sexually assaulting two underage female members of his church. In court, prosecutors showed evidence that he fathered a child with a 15-year-old and played a recording that was supposedly him having sex with a 12-year-old. For the past 2 years, Jeffs has been leading his followers from inside of a jail cell, and no one is quite sure what will happen to the group now that there’s no way he’s getting out. A former church-member told USA Today that “he will definitely remain a prophet behind bars, and they will be telling everybody that God’s going to tear the prison down and let him loose.”

Pic o’ the Week:

The U.S. has been in mourning for the past week after the deadliest day in the war in Afghanistan, when the above 30 U.S. servicemen died in a helicopter attack. The tragedy has come to be known as the Chinook Crash, named after the type of chopper the men were flying in.  This happened over a week ago, but it’s all people have been talking about this week, as more and more details- like the identities of the lost soldiers and the possible identity of the gunman who shot down the plane- have been coming out. In addition to the 30 Americans lost, 8 Afghanis were killed. Among the men who died were 22 members of Navy SEAL Team 6, the same group that took out Osama Bin Laden.

I must have been out of town when this memo was passed around, so perhaps someone can clue me in. When did “feminist” become a four letter word?

I noticed this first earlier this summer, while reading “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Friedan. My book began to cower in fear any time I attempted to take it out of my purse to do some reading public. While people can openly read Harry Potter books and trashy romance novels, my book was met with hostility.

“Why are you reading that trash?” my cousin scowled.

“What are you, becoming some kind of feminist?” a friend of mine asked, while I did some pool-side reading.

I thought to myself, if I had been reading a book about civil rights and the end of slavery, I wouldn’t get a second glance. But a book about feminism, one that applies to over half of our population, apparently offends people.

In everyday conversation and friendly debates, rarely have I heard the word “feminist” detached from the word “but.” As in, “I’m not a feminist, but…”

Let’s peruse the dictionary, shall we? Ah, just as I thought. It would seem that the word “feminist” means “of or relating to or advocating equal rights for women.” And how peculiar — contrary to popular belief, its synonym is not “man-hating miserable bitch.” So why is that what people hear when they hear the dreaded f-word?

Of course, we reap the benefits provided to us by the feminists that came before us. We go to school, raise children, or do one or the other or nothing at all. We yell at our boyfriends to clean up their dirty socks off the floor and then demand orgasms in bed. We make and spend our own money and don’t have to ask for an allowance from the man we choose to marry. We proudly call ourselves bitches and lovingly address friends with “hey, slut!” and no offense is taken. But if we’re so liberated, why are we still afraid to use the word ‘feminist’?”

Any thoughts, readers?