You miss Obama’s speech last night? Well here you go…

Top 10 ways to ensure you won’t get a job…

Another plane crash? WTF? I’m never flying again!

Octomom was offered $1 million to do a porno…would you watch? Ew.

Solving the accidental butt-crack show when you bend over in your fav jeans…

Beware AT&T users: Do NOT answer calls from area code 809!

Dying 9-year-old’s last wish is to get married…so she did. Kinda.

I don’t know how I feel about these new Vera Wang shades. What do you think?

Mmm…pancakes.

Evan Rachel Wood is back with Manson. Why?

Need to vent? This site was created for that sole purpose.

My boyfriend Will Arnett is hosting a Super Bowl Party!

Guy gets it on with travel toothbrush?

Are you a coffee shop-aholic?

Evan Rachel Wood clears up the Mickey Rourke rumors.

I’m pretty sure I could win Wing Bowl 2009. 

Are chandelier earrings coming back?

Is that Dakota Fanning!?

Check out Alexander McQueen for Target!

Are colleges going to eliminate grades?

Kelly and Donna are reunited!

Now it’s Pete’s turn to discuss Jessica Simpson’s weight.

Madagascar 2 is expected to rock your socks off, starting this weekend.

Looking for your next love? Look no further, Marilyn Manson is now single! Lucky you!

Is anyone else sick of politics? There is more exciting press to come today.

Pygmy hippos are making a comeback. Well, trying anyway.

Here are some ideas on how to pinch pennies during these oh-so-hard times.

Does Oprah have a new man? What happened to Gayle?

It is SO fashionable to be eco-friendly. Rock it, girl!

Another alleged mobster is now behind bars, but at least now he looks great!

Even President Bush’s dog is pissing people off.

Yet another reported school shooting. So sad. When will the madness stop?

Here are some sex tapes I’d like to see:

Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood

Oh wait, they’ve already made one and called it a music video. On second thought, I’m okay with never watching that again.

Owen Wilson and Kate Hudson.

Even though I have a feeling that I’d just be waiting for Owen Darling (bless his heart) to burst out into tears or for Kate Hudson to snap in half. On second thought, maybe I’ll skip this one too.

Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith

Aren’t you a little curious? They seem so wholesome, but I just get the impression that Jada can handle a whip better than Indiana Jones.

Sting and Trudie Styler.

I know he’s getting old, but don’t you kinda want him to show the work, so to speak, with all that tantric stuff he’s been talking up?

David Duchovny and Tea Leoni.

Mostly because I’d like to see what Dave is packing. Age and bad career moves just can’t dampen my dirty lusty love for this man.

James McAvoy and…Me.

Shot in soft light, of course, maybe reenacting that scene from Atonement. Really, though, I’d do it in the back of a Ford Taurus in a Costco parking lot in the middle of the day if that’s what he wanted.

What’s almost as creepy as a real kiss between Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood? An onscreen kiss between Mary Kate Olsen and Ben Kingsley who is 42 years her senior. Woof!

MK is making her first real on screen debut in The Wackness starring Josh Peck and Ben Kingsley who play a drug dealer (Peck) and a therapist (Kingsley) that form a friendship.

Olsen is one of the dealer’s clients and in some tangled web ends up in a “passionate scene” with Kingsley. Interesting.

Although I am skeptical of the film and of MK’s real acting skills (I’ve seen every MK&A movie, so I know what has come before) I will probably see it anyways. I mean I harbor a deep love for the Olsen twins. To me, they’re like they’re like the family member you will always love no matter how fucked up they get.

But also, Ben Kingsley is in the film. And with his credentials (best actor Oscar for Ghandi and roles in Schindler’s List and House of Sand and Fog), it is hard to imagine that the movie could be that bad.

This week, MK has made her small screen debut in Weeds (anyone else see a trend in the scripts she’s choosing?) as the bible-toting girlfriend of Mary Louise Parker’s son. So, from God Squad to drug-user Mary Kate is building up her street cred and honing her real acting skills.

I for one am excited to see how the girl progress after her 21st year. And for the fact that maybe I can add some real movies to my current MK&A collection.

Yes, I have a collection.

Add in a confused little girl who claims his snoring “lulls her to sleep”, and you’ve just made it impossible for me not to say anything.

In September’s issue of GQ, 19-year-old Evan Rachel Wood lets it all hang out when it comes to her relationship with the Goth rocker, defending her feelings and that weird music video where they’re making out (for way, way too long) in a rainstorm of blood.

“At the end of the video, we’re kissing and it’s raining blood – and for me, that was one of the most romantic moments of my entire life” Wood explains, going on to say “for the first time, I really feel like I’m around somebody and in an environment where I can just let go and not worry about being judged”.

While I have no idea what an actress and a vampire look-alike talk about over dinner, the thing that really freaks me out is the 19-year age difference. 19 years.

The girl is dating someone who was her age when she was born. And sure, Hugh Hefner is doing the same thing (times 3), but at least that man looks like a man! Marilyn Manson resembles some sort of feminine alien.

Let’s just hope these two don’t go and do something stupid, like getting each other’s name tattooed on their tongues or making a sex video. Wouldn’t want Ms. Wood making all her life mistakes before she hits 21.

Okay, I have seen some weird things in my twenty two years, but this video of new creepy couple, Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood making out is possibly the most disturbing video I have seen so far. Manson, who is 38, and Wood, 19, are rolling around and kissing while he fondles her. And the whole thing takes place in a pool of blood! It’s bad enough that they are actually dating, but making a video of it is just too much

Thanks to perezhilton.com, this video is available to the public so that everyone can throw up a little in their mouth. My immediate question was, what does this girl’s parents think? I’m sure they were thrilled when she brought her new boyfriend, aka Marilyn Manson, home for dinner!

Supposedly it’s a preview for the upcoming video for song, Heart Shaped Glasses. Whatever it’s for, it makes me never want to see anything else having to do with that couple ever again.

Check it out for yourself.