As girls, there’s one itty bitty thing that got screwed up in our chromosomes.  Any time we see a slightly attractive male we automatically throw ourselves in their direction like a piece of freakin’ meat.  We instantly get big, googly eyes, say things that we should be keeping to ourselves, and completely freak the eff out our potential soul mate.

It’s hard to remember that guys, unlike us, aren’t very complicated specimens. They typically have one thing running through their minds when they meet us (hint: it starts with an “s” and ends in “ex”), while we already have the wedding and future children’s names picked out by the time introductions are over.

We’re hopeless.  Hopeless romantics, that is.  We want a love like “The Notebook,” but it usually ends up looking more like “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days”…without the happily ever after.

Let’s not let Matthew McConaughey’s beautifully sculpted abs get away from us this time.  No, don’t tie your man down and lock him in your closet (unless he’s into that sort of thing).  All you have to do is avoid scaring him away. Easy, right?

Here are four things you should avoid if you want your happily ever after. Read More »

[The following post was written by dating coach, Kira Sabin, a keg of dating and relationship wisdom. She's been helping people find love for years so we thought we'd tap this keg and see what sort of brilliant advice she has for the CollegeCandy readers. Drink up, ladies.]

Have you ever met someone and wished you had a crystal ball to see into the future? Would there be a date?  Would he like your friends?   Would your parents like him?  Could a relationship form?  Does he have the potential to be “the one”?

“Love is blind” is a quote I believe in whole-heartedly, but in a little different way than most.  I find most people blindly look for love hoping to “bump” into the right person.  They look for the connection and attraction.  That’s all fine and good, but it’s not the stuff healthy relationships are made of.

It is great if you have chemistry and both of you like Lost, but if you aren’t aware of the all the other important stuff – core values, communication, deal breakers – you are probably going to wake up one day and realize you wasted your time.

I am not the dating fairy who can sprinkle magic dust and show you five, ten, or 15 years down the line.  But, by keeping your eyes open, you’d be surprised how much you can really learn about a person without spending the next six months wading around in a questionable relationship.

In fact, with a little know-how, you can learn a lot in the first 30 minutes.
Here are red flags you can watch for when you meet someone to realize if the have real dating potential. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Heyya Dude,
My problem is that I’ve had a crush on this guy for about a year (I met him last June). The crush began because not only is he smart and funny but he would constantly say how beautiful I was and be very flirty. He then asked me to go to a concert with him while he was still dating this chick. I didn’t think anything of it because I got to know the girl and assumed he told her. This happened in August. Flash forward to December, he and this girl break up. At a Christmas party he and I eventually talk and I admit I am attracted to him. He then starts saying, verbatim, “I think you’re so beautiful and when I see you it takes everything in me to not grab you and kiss you.” He kisses me, then says “When I was with [girlfriend] I would think of you and when we broke up you were the first person I thought of. I want to be with you, but not now. I know what I’ve done in the past and you mean more to me then to just take you home and f**k. I respect you and adore you too much to waste you now. I want to come back to you.”

I then just nodded, said it’s fine, I understand, etc. I went for vacation till New Years when we ran each other again at a party. Long story short, I see him make out with another girl. A few days later at my birthday at a bar he is flirty again to me and puts his arms around me from behind. He is acting so lovey dovey that a few friends ask me if I’ve been keeping anything from them because it appears that this guy and I are much more. I end up talking to him and telling him he needs to stop because I saw him kiss that girl. He says she doesn’t mean anything and is just fun since he broke up with his ex. Since then he has come up behind me to hug me, kissed my neck, whispered sweet things in my ear, obviously checking me out, etc. I learned a few weeks ago he just started dating a new chick. I was upset because I have kind of been waiting for him (I know this is dumb). At a party 5 days ago we end up talking like friends about his new lady. He tells me she is being very possessive, doesn’t give him that “fluttering feeling,” and he thinks he wants to end things with her. Needless to say I am officially back to waiting. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Hi Dude,

So I met this guy at a party one night and we exchanged numbers. A few days later he texted me and asked me if I wanted to meet him for some drinks. I met him at the bar and we had a great time. We had so much to talk about, there was never an awkward silence and we ended up staying pretty late. I was going to take the bus home (I go to school in Chicago and the bar was far from my place), but he refused to let me and offered to drive me home, which was in the complete opposite direction of his home. I got really awkward when we pulled up so I sorta just said my goodbye and jumped out of the car. I didn’t want him to think that meant I wasn’t interested so I texted him the next day to thank him and tell him how good of a time I had.

And then…. Nothing.

WTF? It’s fine if he’s not interested (even though that makes no sense based on how well things went) but why would he drive me all the way home if he wasn’t into me? Is it because I didn’t kiss him goodnight?

– First Date Freak Read More »

Got some college questions? Unsure of a decision? Considering spending some time abroad? Just wanna chat it up with some really awesome chics? We’ve got the girls for you. Hit them up in the comments or shoot them an email with the subject “College Q&A”! They’ve got all the answers you need, no matter who you are.

Question:
I’m in a pickle. Yes, I just said pickle. I recently drunkenly made out with a boy who lives on my hall. If that’s not bad enough, his ex GF is in, like, all of my classes and saw it happen (it was at a frat party….I know, embarrassing). Now she’s seriously giving me major sh*t for it and even bitched me out in the hallway in front of one of our lectures. I don’t think I owe her an apology (they were BROKEN UP), but I also don’t want any enemies. Especially because final projects are coming up for one of our marketing classes and there’s a chance we might be in a group together. What the eff am I supposed to do!?

GPA Girl:
Yikes! That really is a pickle. It sucks that this girl is making life difficult for you because of something that was embarrassing but not really a bad thing of you to do. I mean, I’m sure you feel bad enough about it already. As hard as it may be (and as much as you shouldn’t have to do it . . .), maybe you should talk to this girl. Write her an e-mail or pull her aside in the cafeteria or something and just say, “Hey. I am really upset because of the way you’ve been treating me around campus, and I just want to ask you to stop, please, because I don’t have anything against you and would like to put this behind us.” If she keeps being totally bogus, I recommend just avoiding her as much as possible. It’ll become pretty clear pretty quick to anyone watching that SHE’s the one with the issue, not you. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Dude,
I’m later into college and I met this amazing guy right at the beginning of my freshman year. We both had an instant connection. We were very flirty, but when I found out he had a girlfriend, I toned it down. We still talked, but never really hung out. I later found out that was because his girlfriend at the time was incredibly jealous of other girls. Well, he just recently broke it off with his LONG term girlfriend and we ended up making out soon after and more than once. He’s such a sweet/caring guy and when we’ve been together for the time we made out, we were together for SEVERAL hours at a time, and also had amazing conversation! He says that he’s attracted to me, finds me incredibly fun to talk to (he’s said that he honestly can’t think of someone he can enjoy talking for as long), that he’ really enjoyed spending that time with me and that I’m this amazing kisser that can also, well, turn him on. He’s also a virgin and not looking to have sex until marriage, so I don’t think he’s saying things to get into my pants. (Right?!)

We’re very open with each other and he’s told me point-blank that I’m not a rebound, but he definitely wants to be single for a while, which I totally understand! I think people need to take a break after getting out of a long serious relationship to find themselves.  He calls me his friend and we are, but I don’t know if it will ever progress into something else. I’m not looking to jump right into a relationship, but I don’t just mindlessly makeout with my friends, so I’m not exactly sure where this is going – if it is at all. Is it just that the timing is off or will it progress?  Maybe I should take things chill, show him I’m not the jealous type, and down the road he’ll see that things could possibly work.

I would love to here your opinion and advice!
Thanks so much,
Don’t Wanna Be a Rebound

Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can't scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Dear dude,

Problem: my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend texts him constantly. They were in a relationship for 2 years on and off in high school. I asked him to not talk to her and he didn’t for about 4 months. But she texted him consistently and he finally gave in and started talking to her. He said she really needed him for advice. I know this because I sometimes check his phone. Bad I know on my part but I had good reason to! Now he locks his phone and I’m worried he has something to hide. I know she still loves him; am I being paranoid? I’m in a new relationship and we have told each other we love each other already. We discussed this but I’m just not comfortable with the whole thing; should I be?

Sincerely,
Skeptical Read More »

It’s no secret that everyone wants honestly in their relationship, but there are some things we just DON’T want to know (or want them to know!).  Much like you wouldn’t disclose to your man exactly what happened between you and his roommate freshman year, here’s a list of things we definitely do not want to hear from guys we’re gettin’ down with:

1. His “Number”: I admit that sometimes I get curious and I’m tempted to ask, but I resist! I really don’t wanna know how many other chicks he’s gotten naked with, especially if I’m into him.

2. Bowel movements: Even if the relationship is years old, there should still be a little mystery in the bathroom. He should tell his frat brothers about what he’s doing/did/about to do (in graphic detail) in there, not me.

3. Anything positive about his ex: I don’t care if she was pretty, smart, a good cook, or great in bed. It’s best not to mention her at all, but if he must, we prefer to hear that she was some variation of a crazy person who didn’t fulfill his needs and has much, much smaller boobies. Also… Read More »

Week after week (after week after week…), CollegeCandy and our pal John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, and saddest things he hears on his college campus. And we know he’s not the only one who hears this stuff. Join the Overheard revolution! Listen in on some weirdos’ conversations and share them in the comments or send ‘em over. You know there’s a lot of funny things to be heard on your campus, so get listening.

(Frat guy, at a party.)

Guy: Okay, everyone! Dicks up, boy couch!

(Two guys in class, before lecture starts.)

Guy 1: My girlfriend broke up with me, and sent me pictures of her and her new boyfriend in bed.

Guy 2: Ouch.

Guy 1: Yeah, I sent them to her dad.

(Girl at a party.)

Girl: C’mon, let’s get out of here!

Guy: We can’t. You’re wasted. Let’s stay here.

Girl: I’m not that drunk. (Passes out into a pile of empties.) Read More »

Dear Dude,

So, I’ve been dating my boyfriend for awhile now, and things are really great. We live an hour away from each other and he makes the effort to drive to see me every week for at least a couple of days at a time, sends me flowers at work, and calls me a few times a day at least. We have a very honest relationship, and share pretty much everything with each other. I really couldn’t ask for a sweeter boyfriend, or a better relationship.

Ever since we’ve started seeing each other, I’ve noticed something a little weird though. He talks about his exes, a lot. He’ll bring up random comments (“that house looks like ___’s house”) or just tell me stories when something reminds him. It’s mainly two girls that he talks about, that he was with for 3 and 5 years. Honestly, I really don’t want to hear these stories; I know everyone has a past and I’m okay with that…but I just don’t care or want to know about it. The relationships with these girls ended years ago. On top of that, I made a passing mention of my ex’s name once and he got so upset! He told me he doesn’t want to think about it, and that it upsets him hearing it.

Is he not over these girls, or was he just with them for so long that he’s used to bringing them up in conversation? What’s his deal!

- Keep It To Yourself Read More »