Hey, time-line haters, there’s still hope for you if you want to recover the classic Facebook layout. All you have to do is move to Russia! Yeah, sorry, not so simple. Introducing VK.com, Russia’s largest social networking site. It has more users than Facebook in Russia, but it’s basically a knockoff of Facebook circa 2006. You know, the really old school layout. With the status update box that still says “Garnet is…” and the good old “wall.”

So the original Facebook isn’t gone, it just relocated to Russia. We don’t quite understand all the hate directed toward Facebook’s new time-line profiles, but seeing the old layout did make us a bit nostalgic. We started to wonder if some of the other classic things we had when growing up have also moved over to Russia. Maybe our 90s/early 2000s favorites aren’t gone after all! Here are 9 things we hope still exist in Russia.

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On the first day, the technologically savvy gods said, “Let there be…. MySpace!”

On the second day, the technological gods woke up with hangovers and thought better of their earlier creation and so they said, “Let there be….. Facebook.” (And really, we can’t thank you enough!)

From there, the technological gods gave us Twitter. A social media platform that allowed us to follow all of our favorite stars, friends and frenemies. And on the seventh day (okay, I know I skipped a couple days here but there were parties and hookahs and lamb offerings and Beyonce-themed karaokes), opting to work instead of enjoying their day of rest… the gods gave us Tumblr.

In a maze of Twitter, Facebook, MySpace, Stumble, the weary brethren (myself, included) struggled to understand the meaning of the seventh creation. Tumblr? A place to…. tumble? An ode to the gymnasts? A home for floor routine inspired decor? Read More »

If you’ve been anywhere on the interwebs or have some sort of smart phone, then you know about Instagram. Facebook recently acquired the photo-sharing company for some Zuckerberg pocket change of $1 billion. Apps like this always have knockoffs, kind of like designer handbags. Remember when Pinspire ripped off Pinterest? Well that’s still going on, and Pinspire is failing. And I’m going to shamelessly plug our Pinterest account while I’ve got you’re attention!

Anyway, there are similar apps to Instagram like Hipstamatic, which is still less trendy so if you’re a hipster you can still use it. We happened to stumble upon Boobstagram. And yes, it’s real. I wasn’t all that surprised when I found out given the kinds of things we have access to these days. But I was extremely surprised when I found out that Boobstagram isn’t quite what you think. Upon first glance, it seems like a site with Instagram photos of boobs. It’s boobs galore! They’re all clothed and not super scandalous, but it’s some serious cleavage. But once you look up,  you notice that the header says, “Showing your boobs on the web is good, showing them to your doctor is better.” Read More »

I refuse to get timeline. Several of my friends have given in because they’re tired of the ads popping up on their profile, and they don’t want Zuckerberg to win. Well, Facebook is going to have to force me into the change next week. I’m not doing it. I’m tired of Facebook making changes, and then they went and bought Instagram. Yes, I understand that they’re growing social media, but it’s getting out of line. I miss the old Facebook days when you actually needed a .edu email address to access it. Facebook is great, but honestly the constant changes and updates are turning me off.

Maybe I’m just stubborn, but I am holding onto old Facebook for as long as possible. I don’t want a large cover photo and a subsequently smaller profile picture. I don’t want everyone to easily go back in time on my profile. I like my wall the way it is right now. Why, Zuckerberg, why?! I feel like Facebook is becoming the Apple of social media. Every time they announce something new, we have it for a few months, and then another change is made. Make up your mind! Read More »

If you haven’t heard already, Facebook bought Instagram today. Mark Zuckerberg has been quoted saying the following:

“For years, we’ve focused on building the best experience for sharing photos with your friends and family. Now, we’ll be able to work even more closely with the Instagram team to also offer the best experiences for sharing beautiful mobile photos with people based on your interests.”

Some have speculated that Facebook’s latest buy is an attempt to box out the competition. Others have also complained heavily that, under Facebook’s administration, Instagram is ruined. While this may be true, Facebook, a billion dollar company, is pretty good at running the show. In fact, Facebook would probably successfully run several other companies as well. Here are some companies I think Facebook should buy:

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[Lead image via androidauthority.com]

Before we get into the thick of this, I want to make something very clear. I am not an overly romantic person. I roll my eyes at cheesy love songs, have absolutely no plans for my wedding, and think the idea of giving each other gifts for every single holiday is not only a bit much but also expensive. I am not a high maintenance girl. I swear– you can check my references. But I’ve noticed a disturbing trend as of late that has made me stop and say something I never thought I would say…

What happened to wooing? What happened to a guy and a girl getting together for a date and getting to know each other? What happend to calling a girl to speak to her instead of sending an endless stream of texts? Why are guys trying to arrange and cancel dates via Facebook? It’s awkward and unnatural, and honestly, kind of cowardly. And completely unromantic.

I’m going to give you a clue for anyone who’s ever wondered what my secret identity really is: I’m not Josh Hartnett. I’m not even a fan of his, but I am a fan of 40 Days/40 Nights and since Ash Wednesday was oh, so, recent, I felt inspired to re-watch that rom-com romp. In case you’ve never seen it, it’s about a heartbroken Hartnett who is socially and emotionally crippled from being dumped by his long-term girlfriend that he takes a vow: no sexual gratification for Lent and thus freeing himself from her…influence? I don’t know, the logic takes some selling, I’m sure Sarah Palin could make sense of it. Being as this is the season of Lent, when good Catholic boys and girls are sacrificing one of their favorite luxuries for 40 days, I started to wonder, how productive an idea is this for the 21st century? I’m all for penance, don’t get me wrong, love me some BDSM, but while you can give up certain things, are their ones that you shouldn’t give up? I mean, Josh Hartnett becomes unable to work, have friendships, or eat pancakes. Is that healthy? Isn’t that going a bit too far? So, after some extensive research, I’ve come up with a list of 11 things that women should not give up for Lent, for the good of mankind.

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There you have it, ladies. 11 things you shouldn’t sacrifice for Lent. Some of these might be shocking. Some of these might be bewildering. But that’s the way it goes sometimes. What did I miss? What couldn’t you live without for 40 days and 40 nights? Before you even ask in the comments, don’t worry, this is just part one. Next time, we’re going to tackle the boys…figuratively speaking.

Fire in the hole!

The Dude

Even though it’s so cathartic to vomit a few passive aggressive phrases on your Facebook status update or TwitPic a shot of the horribly dressed person standing ahead of you in line, don’t ever slam your parents on social media. Because you just might end up with BULLETS in your laptop and accidental YouTube infamy, just like Hannah did.

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Although Facebook has dramatically changed the rules of social interactions, there are some things that are still not allowed. This includes writing certain comments on certain people’s walls. As much as I’d like to tell my crush how much I like him, that sort of thing has yet to be deemed socially acceptable (unfortunately). So, instead of writing these comments on my Facebook friends’ walls, I’m just going to post about it…hopefully they don’t see this. Anyway, here’s what I would say if consequences/embarrassment didn’t exist… Read More »

You wake up. You reach over to your bedside table, grab your ringing phone and click the dismiss button to stop the alarm. Phone still in hand, you rub your left eye, but leave the right one open and peek at the device in your palm. Eleven new emails and four texts. You check them sleepily–texts from your mom, your sister and two from your best friend. Then move on to the emails–one from work, a few from school, some announcing sales at your favorite stores and lastly, a notification that John Smith wants to be your friend on Facebook. John Smith? Who is that?

Getting out of bed, you plop down in front of your computer and pull up the social networking site. You check out John Smith, but still don’t know who he is. Then you realize he has sent you a message. “Hey, we met at a bar the other night. It wasn’t anything big, we just introduced ourselves. How are you?” You still don’t really remember him, but you accept the friend request anyway. Then you go back to your news feed, where you see that your friend in Texas has put up new pictures. Clicking through them, you realize you haven’t talked to her in almost two years, but still know most of what’s going on in her life. Read More »