Seriously, this is what she looks like 6 weeks after giving birth?!

Is Ashlee Simpson Fall Out Boy’s Yoko Ono?

Welcome to the fad diets of 2010.

Taylor Swift is too busy for her fans.

11-year-old gives birth…on her wedding day.

Uh. That’s Lady Gaga? Holy crap.

So I finished the month.

And while I think the 4-Day Diet has its positives and is a great eating plan for people new to the health/weight loss game, I realized why I don’t succeed on programs like this:

I become obsessed with food.

I stare at my food list 12 times a day and spend the rest of my time constantly thinking about my next meal or snack. Result: I think I’m hungry (always) when I’m not. And that’s not the best feeling when you are trying to lose a few pounds, eh?

The thing is, I know how to eat healthy and I know what I should and shouldn’t be doing. I personally did not need someone to tell me what kinds of foods are good for me and what are not. I just needed to stop eating the crap I knew was bad.

And this program definitely helped with that. What it did do was remind me that the little things I eat add up big time. A few bites here and there add up to a few pounds here and there and, before you know it, I’m breaking a serious sweat squatting and lunging my way into my jeans.

I also learned that I eat often out of boredom or stress, something I know most of you can relate to. So this month I learned how to combat my fake hunger. When I get a craving or think I’m hungry, I envision eating a healthy meal (like carrots and bell peppers). If that sounds good to me then I know I’m truly hungry. If all I want is a McFlurry, then I know hunger is not the real issue (and PMS/boy trouble/an addiction to M&Ms is). It’s a great tip and it will keep you from giving in too quickly to the temptations in the dorm cafeteria, at work, or at the lib.

Overall, I’m happy I gave the 4 Day Diet a try – I learned some new tips and tricks to keeping healthy and, more importantly, learned more about myself. I also learned that when a diet tells you that pizza is OK, eating an entire pizza is not.

Just a thought.

So what does this mean?

Chocolate every day? Check.

Cocktails? Check.

Cheese, chocolate cake, biscuits, avocado, whole milk, chips, and sorbets? Check, check, and check.

This “no-diet diet” allows you to enjoy the foods you love that are usually condemned by the common fad diets that we occassionally follow. Or try to follow, at least. But lemon water, cabbage soup, and a crate full of bananas just aren’t realistic methods of losing weight in the long run. Blum advises us to forget our traditional beliefs of what good foods and bad foods are, and focus on the nutritional qualities of each food instead.

On food:

Fat is good; we need cholesterol and certain saturated fats to make and regulate our hormones, so we can avoid depression and even cancer. Quality trumps quantity in importance, Blum stresses, so certain “fabulous fats” found in nuts, seeds, and olive oil should be ingested at every meal, while “frankenfats” such as those in low-fat, low-cholesterol spreads and margarines should be banned from your diet to ward off headaches and and joint aches. Eat egg yolks in conjunction with egg whites, and don’t say no to that little voice in your head that screams for a smear of hot butter on warm toast. Starchy foods like rice, beans, and corn are also good for you, as well as the occasional cocktail, as long as there’s no sugar.

On exercise:

Like most nutritionists, Blum says skipping meals is a big no, and exercising is a definite yes. But exercise should be considered “an opportunity, not a punishment,” so only do the things you really enjoy doing, like gardening, walking, or even pole dancing (for those of us who are a bit more risqué).

On sun:

You should also make sure you get at least 15 minutes of sun exposure at least three times a week for the vitamin D benefits, without sunscreen. This may alarm those who slather SPF 90 on themselves like   Martha Stewart slathers icing on a cake (and my dermatologist, to be sure), but Blum argues that most cancers are caused by lack of vitamin D.

On other stuff:

Other important nutrients include calcium, magnesium, primrose oil, borage oil, and milk thistle, all of which can be purchased as supplements to help suppress appetite and maintain healthy organ function (not to mention relieve those nasty PMS cramps).

Some foods are banned from the diet, however, including pasteurized milk, soy, white flour, and water drunk from plastic bottles.

So…will you try the no-diet diet? Or is it a no-go for you?

Week Two was a lot harder for me than Week One. I lost 4 pounds in the first week, but my typical yo-yo self sees results and then thinks it’s a free for all. The Smooth and Protein Stretch modules gave me a lot more choices, more flexibility and my favorite 5 letter word: P-I-Z-Z-A. Holler. Surely any girl watching her weight would do a Kirsten Dunst in Bring It On type cheer if instructed to eat TWO pieces of pizza. But not me.

Because I knew once I started with the Pizza all hell would break loose.  And by hell I mean the inner voice inside of me who tells me that while watching TV, I should devour everything in my kitchen. She really is a biznatch, that voice. Sometimes I think that eating a little more peanut butter on a spoon with chocolate chips will shut her up. But sadly, that chick is too legit to quit, and even the recent salmonella threat won’t scare her away. Not-a-chance.

Not that I like to blame everything on that time of the month, but I think I had a harder time staying under control this week because I was so. very. PMS that even my boss noticed me crying at a commercial. True story.

By week’s end, the scale was back up the 4 pounds I was down; I’m hoping it was because of my monthly visitor, but after the amount I consumed (fresh baked banana bread, anyone?) I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just from over-doing it.

What this week did teach me, though, was this is life. There are always going to be bad weeks – that came in Loud and Clear – and there will be constant curve balls, or days when you just eat everything including the kitchen sink. And maybe you plateau a week, maybe you gain a pound, but as long as you start to be aware, accountable, and realize you are doing it, figure out why (stress and boredom are my problems) it should hopefully help you slowly but surely curb that habit. (And if not, now there is Extra Sugar Free Gum! Thank you product placement and the Biggest Loser!)

I know I’ve been here before, but I do think I am finally making a breakthrough in that I’m not giving up just because I effed up. I’m not throwing in the towel and swearing off this program saying it doesn’t work. I am holding myself accountable and re-evaluating what it is that leads me to go cuurrrazy around banana bread in the first place…

I told myself during these first two phases that I would follow the plan as strictly as I possibly could. Afterall, the beginning is the kick-start, sets the tone, and would get me into the right mindset.

The first four days (detox) consisted mostly of fruits, green veggies, brown rice, beans, legumes, and a little bit of yogurt and eggs. I never realized how great of an option (and how filling) beans were. I made a fabulous bean salad drizzled with some balsamic vinegar and lemon juice that was scrumptious and kept me full all afternoon.

The second set of four days (transition) was similar food-wise to the Detox days, but started to add back some more food. Colored veggies, proteins, even two snacks a day from a huge list in the back of the book (ranging from cottage cheese to a sweet potato to 1/2 cup fro yo etc).

I noticed the first day of detox was the hardest day all week. My body wasn’t used to no sugar (aside from the sugar in fruit) so I felt a bit sluggish, which I anticipated.

But after day one, I was bursting with energy.

I’ve been at this weight loss game for awhile, but this week forced me to wipe away the fog that was clouding me from seeing my true eating habits. Over the past year, while I haven’t gained anything significant, I haven’t lost either. “I eat SO healthy,” I would say to myself and blame my lack of progress on my thyroid problem…

While I do have a thyroid issue (minor) I am on medicine that should be regulating it. So there is no excuse. What this week forced me to realize is slowly but surely those extra bites here and there became daily habits. Without thinking I would grab a few Hershey Kisses here, a sprinkle of dried cranberries on my salad there, a Trader Joes Dark Chocolate 100 calorie bar (amazing) while watching TV at night, even though I truly wasn’t hungry. And adding things like that every day adds up to an extra few hundred calories at LEAST. While it may not be enough to make me gain a significant amount, it sure was enough to keep me from losing.

This week made me stop and reevaluate my habits, and to once again see how content I can be on clean, whole foods. And while I refuse to give up chocolate forever (the very thought makes me shudder) I think it’s an important lesson we all can learn. Take note this week yourselves; pay closer attention to what you are eating. How often do you just pop something in your mouth without thinking and totally forgot you even did it? How often do you grab a few munchies while watching TV at night, even though you JUST ate dinner? How many of you reach for a snack, convincing yourself that you’re hungry as an excuse to get up from your desk so you don’t have to deal with that 15 page paper? How many of you formed those once in a while extra treats into daily habits?

Trust me, if you pay attention,  you will quickly see what areas need fixing. For me, it forced me to not only realize that I was doing it, but to sit down and think about the reasons WHY.

Next week will bring the Protein stretch and the Smooth modules where I will have some more freedom with food. Should be interesting to see how that one goes…

(Don’t forget to join the CollegeCandy Facebook group, or to follow us on Twitter! Oh yeah; we’re all over the place.) 

So imagine my own surprise when I found myself buying a copy of Dr. Ian Smith’s new “diet” The Four Day Diet last week.

Fact is, these past two years, I have been in a constant fight with my weight. It goes up 5 pounds it goes down 4 it goes up 3 it goes down 1. It fluctuates more than Christina Aguilera’s voice on any given song. I can’t seem to successfully lose and keep off these last couple of pounds. Even though I do eat pretty healthy. Even though I workout 5-6 days a week. Even though I know the importance of complex carbs. And lots of veggies. And fiber. Oh boy do I know about fiber. I’ve read it all – I know the spiels.

So after realizing that complaining about the lack of results doesn’t do me any good and just makes those around me more miserable, I decided that I wanted to do something to give my body (and my metabolism) the real kick in the ass that it needs. Something to get back on track, clean my act up a bit to start seeing progress again. I know it’s cliché to start some sort of weight loss resolution in January, but here it goes. I’m trying it out. And blogging about it for you here.

The 4 Day Diet drew me in because it seems simple. And it’s just that- only 4 days. Well, 4 days at a time. There are 7 modules each lasting for only 4 days. Surely I can stick to something for 4 days! It works out perfectly: just when you get sick of eating one way you switch it up.

The 4-day modules are:

Induction (detox/cleansing)

Transition (to reintroduce all food groups)

Protein Stretch (to avoid plateaus)

Smooth (when you can have some formerly forbidden foods like pizza and French fries)

Push (the sprint just before the final stretch, back to a stricter eating plan)

Pace (a comfortable module for you to catch your breath)

Vigorous (the final module to lose those last few pounds)

The whole point of the program is to work on specific tools to build a lasting weight loss. The diet is based on clean whole foods (no calorie counting) and changes up your food and workout routines to keep your body guessing. And unlike most weight loss programs, the first 7 chapters are dedicated to getting your mind in the right place.

So here I go again… I’ll be updating every week as I move through the various modules. Hopefully I can help you (and me!) to get motivated, get inspired, and to share your own trials, tribulations and sucess stories as well.

But can it help you lose weight?

Hypno-dieting, a new trend that just emerged in the U.S., has been popularized by its celebrity following, including former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell and British model Sophie Dahl. Recently, Lily Allen made headlines when she too endorsed this new type of fad diet, claiming that after several sessions she felt more inclined to choose healthy, low-fat meals rather than junk food. All of which made her lose 2 dress sizes! It’s also helped her give up her beloved bottle of booze, a feat in itself (of which many of my dormmates might take note).

Personally, I think all of this is just hyped-up mumbo-jumbo. I do realize that a healthy approach towards food is a key aspect of living a healthy life, and that counseling could help you get there, but a hypnotist? That seems a little extreme. This reminds me of other weird diets that have gone in and out of fashion, like the Breatharian Diet (yes, a diet based on living off of air- so chock full of nutrients, I suppose) or the diet that Emily from The Devil Wears Prada is on, which she describes as:

“I’m on this new diet where I don’t eat anything until I feel like I’m about to pass out, then I eat a cube of cheese.”

Ok, so it’s not as crazy as that, but giving someone else control over your mind so they can order you to eat healthier? And for 300 euro/hr? Now, that just makes me laugh.

Have you ever gone on a strange diet like the hypno-diet? And I’m curious, did it work?