Dear Tuffy Luv,

My boyfriend of three years just had a falling out with one of his closest friends. I don’t want to go into it here, but it was over something really stupid, neither of them will apologize and now they’re not speaking.

I want to help him mend it, but it seems like it’s just making us fight. I’ve tried talking about it with him and he says he doesn’t want to talk about it. I even tried getting them together at a party, but they wouldn’t speak to each other and my boyfriend just got upset and asked me not to do that again. He says he doesn’t want to be friends with this guy anymore, but I know it’s hurting him.

What can I do to get them back together?

Worried

Dear Worried,

Back off!!!

Look, it’s sweet and all that you want your guy and his friends to get back to being BFFS. But it’s SO none of your business. You need to be available to him, in CASE he wants to talk. Stop trying to force him to talk. All that is going to do is shut him down completely. I assure you, Worried, boy will talk when he’s ready. In the meantime, be there for him. Don’t mention the friend that he’s all secretly wounded about.

Maybe they are actually done being friends. Maybe there’s something deeper and more secret going on that you don’t know about. Or maybe they’re going to get back together but just need a little time apart. Any which way, it’s not your problem to solve. The more you bug him, the more annoyed he’ll be. The more annoyed he is, the less likely he is to confide in you. The less he confides in you, the less likely he is to find a way to work it out.

Just…leave the guy alone, okay? I mean, not alone. Hang out with him. Be cute with him. Do your usual lovebug things. Just, geez, stop mentioning the thing that’s got him upset!!! Why rub salt in the wound? Let it heal, for garshsakes. And why let that friction find its way into YOUR relationship? You’re just making him feel worse. He’s an adult, you know? Trust him that he can handle it and that he’ll come to you when he’s ready.

Make love, not irritation.

Hearts & Skulls,

Tuffy Luv

Question?! Answer: Ask Tuffy Luv.

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With less than three weeks before we welcome 2009, now is the time to do everything you said you would do in 2008. And if any of those plans go awry? You can start off with a clean slate in under 30 days. Now is the time to carpe diem, my friends, so see 2008 out with a bang.

1) Get a jump start on your New Year’s resolution. It’ll make January 1 so much less painful. Dead set on losing weight? Start out each day with a mere 20 minutes of cardio. You’ll lose a couple of pounds before the big par-tay and be motivated to keep toning up throughout January (and beyond). Want to quit smoking? Cut down now. Cold Turkey will be easier when you’ve already cut a pack-a-day habit down to 2 or 3 nicotine sticks.

2) Ask out that hottie from lab. What do you have to lose? The semester’s almost over anyway. And if he’s interested, you might have your New Year’s kiss all lined up.

3) Have a clothing-swap party. Clean out the stuff you bought in 2008 because you thought it would make a fashion statement. Encourage your friends to do the same, and then get together and see if anyone wants someone else’s duds. If your friends don’t want your fashion don’ts, donate them to the Salvation Army or another charity, and start off 2009 with some good Karma.

4) Buy some Obama memorabilia. Come on! Comemorate history in the making with an Obama t-shirt or button or novelty Barack condoms. You’ll be good to go for 2009′s much-anticipated inauguration.

5) Do something BIG. Has 2008 flown by too quickly? Don’t wait till New Years Eve when everyone’s going to be out and about. Grab tickets to a concert, a sporting event, a theater performance, or a comedy show. Get out of the house (and out of your normal weekend routine), and buy a ticket for something that you can file into your scrapbook under “2008.” If you can afford it, take a weekend getaway. If you can’t, try to find one of your city’s secret gems, like a free museum visit or a student discount pass to a local attraction.

6) Make contact. If you’ve lost touch with someone or had a falling out, this is the perfect season to reconnect and make amends. Reflect back on 2008. Should you apologize to your ex-best friend for having a blow out that really wasn’t that significant? Have you grown apart from your Spring ’08 lab partner? Did someone make a difference in your life last year, and you never got to properly thank them? Why wait till “next year”? Do it now.

7. Have a “Best Of” party. Tell your friends to dress in their favorite ’08 trends (even if they went out a couple of months ago), bring over their iPods and blast the best jams of the passing year, or have a 2008 movie marathon. Have everyone write down some 2008 memories, and throw them into a hat; then, read everyone’s contributions out loud. Nothing ends a good year with some damn good reminiscing.

8. Do something small. But still meaningful. Check out this blogger’s “45 Things to Do Before 2009″ List and see if you get inspired. Rent some of Hollywood.com’s “Must See” suggestions. Or, see what other peoples’ goals are, and see if you can relate.

The clock is ticking, friends, and you can’t make up for lost time. What do you hope to accomplish before we begin a new year?