Oh, Snickers! I love you.

You have everything that was ever good stuffed together and covered in chocolate. You are my favorite candy bar. You are even better frozen.

But alas, you hate me. You do! Why? Because of how many calories are in you. Because eating you will give me all the fat I need in one day.

And yet, you tempt me so.

What’s a girl to do? Make a shot that’s the closet thing to your fat-abulous goodness, that’s what.

Snickers Bar

• 1/3 Frangelico

• 1/3 Kahlua

• 1/3 Bailey’s Irish Cream

Take a rocks glass (bigger than a shot glass, smaller than a plastic red cup) and fill it with ice. Pour your Frangelico and Kahlua into the glass, and then “float” the Bailey’s on top.

The best way to “float” a liquor is to hold a spoon upside down and drip the alcohol into you glass drop by drop. It takes a while, but it’s worth it—plus, you look cool. Read More »

Health food is health food.

Health food is good for you. Health food will keep you slim. Right?

Well, not if you eat twice as much.

The Journal of Consumer Research recently released a study about the “obesity paradox”; a trend that shows the rise of both obesity and health food popularity in America.

Basically, the trend goes like this: when people see something that says ‘low fat’, they eat twice as much of it—or—they allow themselves higher calorie deserts or snacks after eating a ‘healthy’ meal.

This development makes perfect sense to me. Whenever I force myself to eat a salad for dinner (I mean, how are lettuce and tomatoes supposed to fill you up?), I’ll go straight for the ice cream afterwards. I’ll tell myself, “I ate real healthy for dinner! I can eat more of this than usual! And I won’t gain weight!”

Which is, of course, total bullsh*t.

Especially when most ‘low fat’, ‘low calorie’, and ‘low carb’ products aren’t always as ‘low’ as they claim to be, and often times have unhealthy hidden components.

Now, I’m no doctor, but I’ve read enough of these America is so freaking chubtastic! studies to hypothesize that our major issue as a nation is our tendency to over-eat. Gorging ourselves on bran muffins is still gorging ourselves. Read More »

You may not be able to tell based on the recent increase in the size of my ass, but I am a calorie counter. In fact, some test even claimed that I might be slightly obsessed with my weight. I weigh my chicken before I put it in my salad, I measure out my fro yo and I always use sugar alternatives in my coffee.

Sometimes, though, I lose track of my goals and fall off the Diet Train. After weeks of avoiding anything battered, fried, or totally tasty, I may be found at the nearest BK picking up some fries. And a milkshake. And an apple pie, or two. Half an hour later, I will find myself feeling totally guilty and yelling at myself in the mirror before heading off to the gym to attempt to work off a fraction of the calories I just inhaled.

What? Is that not normal? Am I the only one who does that?

Yet even I, a self proclaimed crazy/calorie Nazi, do let myself enjoy a few delectable treats now and then. 100% totally guilt free. There are just some things in life that are too good to pass up, like sales at Marc Jacobs and wildly passionate sex….

Or these 5 Treats Totally Worth Eating No Matter How Much Weight You Need to Lose to Look Good In That New Bathing Suit:

1. Fried Oreos: If you have never had one of these you need to get up, buy a ticket to the Indiana State fair and get one. Yes, they are even worth traveling to the Midwest and fraternizing with Carnies. I can’t explain the goodness except to say that I ate 3 and did not feel guilty. For a second. I mean, come on, could there be anything better than frying an amazing cookie? I didn’t think so.

2. Olive Garden Breadsticks: The toasty bread and the smooth butter all tied together with a perfect blend of seasonings. MMM. I get hot just thinking about it. You don’t even need the soup or salad (though they are a nice helping of veggies to ease your carb-guilt). These sticks are worth every freaking calorie. Read More »

I wasn’t fat when I was 12, but I sure as hell felt like it. I probably weighed around 105 pounds—maybe 110—but it still didn’t keep me from feeling like the fattest cheerleader on the squad. I look at that picture of me now, and it makes me sad that at that particular moment in my life, and I remember it so distinctly, that I felt so fat.

Which is why this girl makes me so sad. Aside from the fact that it is absolutely ridiculous, I just feel sad for her.

Brooke Bates was 12 years old when she opted for liposuction and a tummy tuck to take the pounds off. At the time she was 220 pounds, which isn’t a healthy weight. But lipo and a tummy tuck during a time when your body is naturally changing due to puberty? It just seems ludicrous.

Brooke lost 40 pounds from the surgery, which she says took her from being the “big, fat girl to the popular girl.” But then less than a year later, she had gained all but five pounds back. Which makes me think that she—or her parents—weren’t combining healthy eating and exercise (and probably much needed therapy) in with her surgery. It isn’t a quick fix, especially when you’re 12. In fact, surgery shouldn’t be a way to fix it at all at that age.

Twelve is just too young. Read More »

You’ve heard me say it a thousand times. I love K. Clarkson because she seems like a normal human who’s really talented.

Because of my sisterly devotion to KC, I take issue with the newest Star Magazine cover, which features my girl as one of the “Stars Losing the Battle of the Bulge”.

Hmmm. When they say bulge, do they mean a stomach that isn’t sunken? Do they mean a ribcage that isn’t protruding through clothes? Do they mean a waist fitting into a size 8 dress?

Perezhilton featured the cover on his site, and his readers were uncharacteristically on Kelly’s side. It seems I’m not the only one who wants the press to chill out when it comes to the weight of celebrities. Maybe we really are starting to realize perfection doesn’t exist.

What do you think, lovelies?

Is KC packing the pounds, or is she just a normal girl who sometimes makes unfortunate fashion choices?

True to my procrastinating nature, I have yet to begin my summer diet-exercise regimen. And, like any adept procrastinator would, I’ve spent the past month coming up with excuses for why I’ll hit the gym and pick up a yogurt “starting tomorrow.”

In the spirit of making excuses, I’m going to pardon myself and the rest of the lazy gals who have, too, put off their summer 2007 workout plans. The excuse? Summer didn’t officially start until yesterday.

So while there’s no point in regretting our inactivity thus far, I do think it’s about time to step up our game and make up for lost time.

And I’ve got the perfect assistant to help you get back on track: “Tank Top Arms, Bikini Belly, Boy Shorts Bottom.” It’s not just a catchy title. This workout delivers a solid total body workout that’ll prep you for each of the three clothing items referenced.

Minna Lessig, who’s apparently an at-home exercise guru, leads the workout, which is broken down into six sections: warm up; tank top arms; bikini belly; boy shorts bottom; total-body workout; and cool down. Read More »

So you want to lose weight, but don’t feel like giving yourself that extra push on the treadmill or saying goodbye to your weekly dose of pepperoni pizza? Feeling your pain—and wanting your money—pharmaceutical companies have finally discovered a way to make everyone thin and happy.

Alli, the first FDA approved over-the-counter weight loss drug has just hit stores, and people are coming out in droves to snatch the product that claims to help users lose “50 percent more weight for the same effort than traditional diet and exercise plans”.

The new diet sensation is not completely novel—it’s prescription only predecessor was 50% stronger—but it’s the first time the advantages of taking a weight loss supplement seem to outweigh the disadvantages. Read More »

Not gonna lie; since college ended, TV has become a huge part of my life. And thanks to the brilliant minds behind TiVo, I don’t even have to suffer through those annoying commercial breaks anymore. (Though I do love the new Mac commercials and find myself stopping to watch ‘em).

And according to some dude in Chicago, that is making me fatter!

Recent studies have shown that people tend to eat more when they are watching TV shows that they like. Because their minds are focused on the entertainment from the TV they do not focus on the food they are ingesting or the feelings of fullness being sent by the brain.

Which all means that I don’t pay attention to the amount of Cheetos I am shoving in my face during an episode of The Simple Life because I am paying far too much attention to Nicole Richie’s rib cage peeking through her skin. And it doesn’t matter that my Cheetos are baked, damnit! I am eating way more than I want/need/would eat if I was not watching TV or watching something far less entertaining…like the last season of The O.C. Read More »

Our country has an obvious obsession with skinny people, as evidenced by phenoms such as the new hot body part: the clavicle. I know that it is easy to equate thin with healthy. The less body fat you have, the healthier you are. Makes sense, right?

Well, this actually might not be true. According to a recent Associated Press article, thin people might actually have a lot of internal fat surrounding organs. This kind of fat could be just as dangerous as external fat. Yes, finally, sweet justice for all normal sized girls. You skinny minis could be have just as much fat on the inside. HA.

“According to the data, people who maintain their weight through diet rather than exercise are likely to have major deposits of internal fat, even if they are otherwise slim. ‘The whole concept of being fat needs to be redefined,’ said Bell, whose research is funded by Britain’s Medical Research Council.”

Holler. I agree with this Bell guy. If this research is true, then using the term “fat” could refer to a lot of things. This is definitely an interesting concept to ponder…Maybe someone should inform Nicole Ritchie or Mary Kate about the news!