My dearest Cosmo has always had a special affinity for body language analysis (I think they’ve done Speidi like 6 times). Now they’re taking it to the next level and making it all easy, convenient and user-friendly for you!

Cosmo understands the trials and tribulations of dating, especially when we need to figure out the bizarre and complex behavior of the male species.

Finally fed up with trying to decipher a guy’s body language to decide what he’s really trying to say (as opposed to, ya know, listening to him), Cosmo has provided the ultimate guide to date night body language. And, naturally, they made convenient tear-out cards (because your date totes won’t notice you squinting to read them under the table).

Cosmo Says: If he holds his beer loosely by the neck, it means he’s confident–but cocky, “it gives off the vibe that he’s too cool to be concerned with the risk of dropping his Bud.”
Kari Says: Hm, I’d never thought of it that way. Then again I’ve never really taken the time to study a hot guy’s precise style of drink-holding (I’m usually too busy checking out his hair, eyes, smile, biceps, etc). This particular method of holding a beer tells me he doesn’t want his hand to be all clammy and gross should he need to shake hands – not that he’s necessarily a douche bag. For that tip off I would look for a guy clutching his Jaeger bomb tightly so he won’t drop it while he’s fist pumping. Just sayin’…

Cosmo Says: If he pushes his drink onto your side of the table, he’s subconsciously trying to bond.
Kari Says: Alright, I’m down with a little bit of bonding. I just hope he doesn’t change his mind after I proceed to drink whatever he’s sliding toward me. My interpretation of anyone moving alcohol within closer proximity of me is that I should drink it – quickly. But maybe I just play flip cup too often.

Cosmo Says: If a guy licks his lips, he’s trying to wipe a lie off of them.
Kari Says: First of all, this sounds like it could be stitched onto a pillow somewhere in my Gramma’s house.   Second of all, I have heard the lip-licking lie detector test before (Lie to Me is one of my new fave shows), so this interpretation may have merit. But what if he’s just thirsty? Or in dire need of some Chapstick? What if he’s thinking about other things he’d like to lick later? All I’m saying is that I wouldn’t be so fast to jump to conclusions about the nature of such a sexy move (when done correctly, of course – otherwise it’s just creepy). Read More »

Don't run away from me. I'll get you!

I just went on a date with a guy who blathered on about himself (which is only okay when I do it!), and referred to women as, and I kid you not, “dumb bitches.” Since said date last Friday, he has not called me.

And I really, really hope he does.

Look, I like to consider myself an intelligent, rational person. But what I will never get is why a person becomes 10 billion more times appealing to me when they don’t want me. The day after our date, I was actually dreading the dude calling me…I didn’t want to spend a second evening with the most egotistical person since Tucker Max (who he, by the way, actually quoted. Good role model!). But as each day went by and no call came…I suddenly found myself only focusing on his good qualities. He was smart. He was cute. He was funny (maybe he was joking when he said women were dumb bitches…). Why was his unavailability suddenly turning him from nightmare to dreamboat? Read More »

Something weird is happening. After a month of bitching that I don’t get asked out on dates enough, I canceled a third date. With a cute law student. If she were dead, my grandmother would be rolling in her grave right now…but instead she’s screaming at me that she’s never going to have great grandchildren.

To be honest, the boy is absolutely perfect on paper: attractive, on a similar career path as me, personable, polite… did I already say attractive? That counts as two.

But I have found a number of little, tiny reasons to be not-so-attracted to him. I don’t like the guy because he has this rare disease that causes him to spell absolutely everything wrong in his text messages. We’re not talking a mere omission of commas, I mean “Z’s” where “S’s” should be. It is a nuclear war on grammar. Read More »

I’ve learned a ton of useful things at college, and I hate to say (sorry Mom and Dad) that most of most of this knowledge I’ve acquired outside of the classroom. One pivotal lesson I’ve gleaned from my 3 years in school: dating in college is hard.

Coming from a school with a 60/40 ratio of girls to guys, with a large slice of that 40% uninterested in boobs, I’ve got very few choices. The pool of college boys has been unimpressive and disappointing to say the least – I’m sick of random hookups with frat boys (yes, it’s true) and trying to get a college boy to commit.

I know there are some great guys out there, but maybe I’m looking in the wrong places. I’ve heard tons of success stories about online dating, but honestly, I’m a little nervous.  I’ve dabbled in the online pool, but I’m still not sure it’s the right thing for me.

Help! I’m torn. Read More »

This Week’s Article: 5 Lies All Women Tell by askmen.com.

This article’s tag line is: “If she’s said any of these things to you, she’s lying.” Starting off with a gross generalization is never a good thing, but let’s take a look at what lies the boys at AskMen think we’ve been telling. All of us. Every time we speak.

“I’m not mad at you.”

Askmen says: “Oh, yes she is. Don’t think you’re getting off that easily. This lie is one of the most frequently used in relationships. Typically, women who have been hurt by men in their lives — often inadvertently — use this phrase as an emotional defense. For example, if a guy forgets his girlfriend’s birthday, calls her by his ex’s name or commits any of the other minor screw ups that most men do on a daily basis, women usually can’t just let it go. They dwell on it, letting worries whittle away normal feelings of well-being like a dog gnaws on a bone.”

I say: This is true some of the time, but there are definitely times we really just aren’t mad! Really! And if we are, we don’t all let it “whittle away normal feelings of well-being”; we can get over things, you know. The best way to get around this confusion is to encourage open and honest communication from the start of a relationship. Read More »

Did Sarah Palin tell anyone of her plans?

Is this recession going to be a depression?

Miley Cyrus is single, y’all.

What not to say on date numero uno.

Did Chris Brown steal Kanye’s lady?

A final tribute to Billy Mays.

An hour before my first date with my boyfriend, I was sitting at dinner with a friend who had a single piece of advice for me: “Whatever you do, don’t sleep with him on the first date,” she said. Though I’ve heard iterations of the same first date rule (“Don’t go home with him on the first date”, “Nothing beyond kissing on the first date”, etc.), I was surprised to hear it from my pal — especially since she’s a smart girl who’s comfortable with her sexuality. I told her I’d take her opinion into account, but rule-abiding gal that I am, I proceeded to get wasted, go home with him, and postpone penetration for a whole five hours.

Does having sex in the wee hours of the morning after the first date still count as too early? In society’s eyes, probably. Some variations of the rule even ban sex until double-digit dates. But acting early on the sexual chemistry didn’t hurt my relationship. Nearly a year and a half later, my boyfriend is now my roommate and my respect for rules is still non-existent. It’s not my problem with authority, however, that makes me scoff at delaying sex. I simply don’t believe that the logic behind banning first-date sex is … well, logical. Read More »

Every girl will go through a time in her life when she has to choose: eat dinner or buy a new little piece of fabulous.  We have all been (or are, or will be) so broke that the basic necessities of human life are juggled on a constantly shrinking stage of available funds.  I like to refer to it as my “starving artist” period, through which all writers, photographers, and other creative people must progress.  My parents like to refer to it as “get a job NOW.”

What is a girl supposed to do?  Let me share a relatively recent discovery of mine: you don’t necessarily need money to have a nice meal out.

I moved to New York City for an internship this month and subsequently have no money.  The first weekend I was here just happened to be my birthday (funny how that worked out), so I was obligated to spend lots of moolah…on myself.  Now I have even less money.  This is a HUGE PROBLEM in a city where every block is full of deliciousness and fun.

My solution?  First dates.

It’s not hard to find a guy to take you out on a first date.  First dates are easy – no pressure, no expectations, and all you have to do is chat pleasantly and eat delicious food (or see a cool movie, or whatever).  If you don’t want to take it beyond the first date, then you don’t have to. If you do, then more power to ya, sister (more free food ).

Either way, you both had a nice time and you got to try a new restaurant for free. Win/win.

Obviously, I realize it’s not very nice to use guys just for a free meal.  But hey, the way I see it, they’re getting the pleasure of my company and conversation and I’m not completely ruling out the possibility of a second date or even a relationship (one not entirely based on free food, that is). And I’ll pay it back eventually. You know, when I have a job and I’m making money and not dancing around my sublet when I find a dollar in a pair of jeans I haven’t worn in awhile…

In the meantime, though, that Korean restaurant down the street is looking de-LISH and I think that dishy Korean guy would be the perfect person to buy me dinner.

Got something you need to know, but just can’t ask your friends (or the freaks who weigh in on Yahoo Answers)? Ask Tuffy. She’ll answer anything (seriously, anything!) honestly and without judgment. After all, her name isn’t Sugar Coater. So shoot her an email: tuffyluv@collegecandy.com.

Dear Tuffy Luv,

I went out with a guy a few weeks ago. We had a really good time (I think?). We had a few drinks, then he drove me all the way home, even though I told him I could walk. The convo was great, we had a lot in common and I thought he was a cutie patootie. I don’t want to be all annoying girl in “He’s Just Not That Into You,” but I really don’t understand why he never called? Aren’t all those things signs that he’s interested?

Perturbed.

Dear Perturbed,

Number one: If I catch you drinking and driving again, I will cut you in the face. Seriously, not cool. You heard, everyone?! No matter how short the distance, it’s NEVER okay to risk others’ lives.

And now to address your actual question. Okay. This is tricky because there actually is no answer. Let’s look at a couple o’ scenerios.

Numero unoski: He likes you and is too shy to make the next move. Actually, this is the most likely. Maybe you should give him a call and see if he wants to go out again. You never know what might happen. Read More »

[One of the greatest aspects of college life is the morning-after recap with friends. You stumble out of bed, grab your liquid of choice, and gather around the living room to replay (and remind yourself of) the events of last night. You laugh, you cringe and you share the highest of highs...and the rock-bottom lowest of lows. We thought we'd bring the fun of the recap to CollegeCandy, so grab that coffee and take part in the deliciously awkward moments your CC friends have to share.]

I hadn’t known John* very well, so when I got a text at 11pm saying “I’m bored, come hang out” I should have immediately seen the booty call red flag. Especially because we had set up a first date for the next night, but John was hot and he cracked me up so I was excited to see him. When I got there, he answered the door and immediately shushed me. You see, his parents were sleeping and John wasn’t allowed to have girls over past a certain hour.

Dating a guy who lives with his parents isn’t so awesome, but we’re all broke college students so I tried to understand as he hurried me through the pitch black living room scattered with baby pictures and Precious Moments figurines. I was a little less understanding when he led me straight into an ottoman. I fell, and not a small fall either. I fell down, on the ground, wincing in pain. But again, I was crushing so I picked myself up grabbed his hand and tried not to think about my scraped knee.

Read More »