I am pretty confident in my long-term relationship knowledge. Actually, at this point, I am pretty much an expert, as I am going on 8 years.
Yes, I heard the gasp. Someone just dropped her plate. Someone else is chocking on her Ramen. It isn’t common that you come across a college girl who is one half of a committed relationship, especially one with their high school sweetheart. But here I am. I do exist.
That being said, I know what it means to be a “real” couple. I’ve gone from the butterflies and blushing to knowing what he is thinking without even saying a word. We’ve been at this so long we’ve hit every milestone….more than once. And I’m talking about them all, from the biggies (like the first Valentine’s Day to meeting the parents) to the ones that people often forget, but which are the actual gauges of how serious your relationship really is.
The Fart
Undoubtedly one of the most important markers (and most disgusting, might I add) is farting. Yes, I had a couple excruciating years of holding them in every time we were together, and if one slipped out on accident I immediately blamed the dog. But there comes a point where you are comfortable enough with the other person to just let em’ rip (of course my boyfriend probably wishes I was not this comfortable, but that’s besides the point). Read More »
You’ve been working your game all night, leaning in just enough to show off the magic that is your Victoria’s Secret Deep Plunge push-up bra. Your hair is perfect, your makeup is flawless and you’ve done your signature laugh-and-touch-his-arm move every time he’s said something cute and funny.
Now you’re just waiting for him to lean in and kiss those perfectly glossed lips.
You like this boy; every last thing about him. He’s got the same major as you, you have mutual friends, he wears really great jeans and he even watches The Hills. Could there be anyone more perfect!? You’ve been dreaming about kissing him since the moment you met him and now you’re so almost there. He’s ditched his friends to talk to you in the corner of the party for the last half hour, so you’re pretty much sure this makeout sesh is in the bag.
After screaming into each other’s ears over the “Put It In The Bag” blaring from the speakers, he asks you if you want to go outside to get some air. The butterflies in your stomach start jumping around in excitement. Coyly, you agree to go.
He takes your hand (swoon!) and leads you outside. Your knees are trembling, but you pull yourself together and follow him through the crowd. Once outside, you begin to shiver. Not because it’s cold, but because you just know he’s going to kiss you and you’re at once nervous and excited. Read More »
[One of the greatest aspects of college life is the morning-after recap with friends. You stumble out of bed, grab your liquid of choice, and gather around the living room to replay (and remind yourself of) the events of last night. You laugh, you cringe and you share the highest of highs...and the rock-bottom lowest of lows. We thought we'd bring the fun of the recap to CollegeCandy, so grab that coffee and take part in the deliciously awkward moments your CC friends have to share.]
I will admit it, I’m an awkward girl. I’ll say goodbye to someone and then walk in the same direction as them with a stupid grin on my face. I’ve messed up high fives more times than should be legally allowed. I’ve called my roommates good friend (whom I’ve known for months) “Tyler,” when his name is “Lucas”…HOW DO YOU MESS THAT UP? I’m able to take a perfectly normal moment and transform it into a typical scene in any Wes Anderson film (it’s a gift). The trouble is, I don’t realize how incredibly dorky I must look until looking back, and slapping my forehead accordingly.
So by the rules of physics (which I am unsurprisingly sucky at) it would only make sense that I would take this persona I’ve been cursed blessed with and apply to almost every sexual encounter I’ve experienced. Well, of course, the beginnings are more of learning experiences rather than “fun timez.” Now let’s time travel back 7 years when it all began…
Cue the hazy flashbacks and dream-like sound effects.Read More »
[The following post is courtesy of our homegirls over at YourTango. They’ve been through it all and know just about everything about love, so we thought we’d bring their expertise to you. Enjoy!]
The night’s going great, you can’t believe you’re hitting it off so well on a first date, he’s a great kisser, you take him home…
Whatever you do, don’t sleep with him.
You’ve heard it before, but I’m not going to browbeat you about the immorality of going all the way on the first night. I’m also not going to say, as the London Telegraph does, that you’re likely to drive away relationship material if, as the adage goes, the man “gets the milk for free.” (If that drives him away, then be glad you’re seeing the taillights.) No, take it from a man who knows: there’s a hidden reason that—if you play it right—you should never have sex on a first date.
Holding out on the magic act for at least one night—and even for a number of candlelit evenings after that—will actually improve your sex life with the beau in question, both in the moment and down the line. When you know in advance that you’re not doing the deed, you have no choice but to compensate by exploring the full range of the available possibilities—whatever you dictate them to be. Read More »
I hate waiting for guys to approach me, mostly because they never do. So, instead of standing in the corner giggling with my girlfriends while simultaneously sucking in my belly, I do laps around the bar and approach the guys who pique my interest. Or libido.
It seems to work for me, but during a recent interview with the Millionaire Matchmaker (which will be coming soon!), I learned that women should never make the first move. Ever. Not in one million years. Bad idea. Never do it.
I wanted to believe Patti – after all, she knows her sh*t – but I just wasn’t sure if all guys felt the same way she did. I mean, guys are lazy and have fragile egos; surely letting the girl do all the work would be a huge turn on? I asked my go-to guy for his take on the situation.
See what he thinks about making the first move: Read More »
[This post is courtesy of our gal pal, Marie Claire.]
It all started 10 years ago with a drunken kiss, which quickly led to drunken sex. She was the cool, pretty receptionist at the glossy music magazine where I was interning. But after a few more heated nights together that summer, my gig ended, and so did our trysts. I initially dismissed our encounters as nothing more than clumsy, alcohol-fueled experimentation — little did I know things were going to get much more complicated.
Prior to that fateful fling, I had been straight as a ruler and extremely confident about my figure. I’d always been robust (185 pounds), and proudly so. Constant attention from men — be it coy advances or vulgar catcalls — kept me feeling like a wanted woman. I was certain that my large breasts, tiny waist, and curvaceous hips were irresistible to members of the opposite sex. These assets — in any size and shape — were just so alien and intriguing to them. Read More »
They are always exciting and romantic and make me weak in the knees. Well, the ones with people I like, at least. I’m not counting those drunken makeout sessions with some creeper who attacks you out of nowhere while you’re enjoying a night out with the girls.
The first kiss is a pivotal moment in any relationship. After waiting forever (be it weeks, days, minutes…), wondering if he/she wants to kiss you as much as you want to kiss him/her, your lips finally meet and it’s all fireworks and passionate background music.
….Or slobbering sounds and teeth knocking into eachother.
Yeah, we may all want that romantic first kiss scene that we’ve seen in all our favorite movies (Slumdog Millionaire) and TV shows (Full House…with the “ooooo”s coming from the fake live audience), but there are a lot of really bad kissers out there. And somehow we keep finding them.
The question is: is a bad kiss enough to turn you off completely? Does a little (ok, a lot of) drool cancel out the great conversation, cute eyes and fact that he actually brought you flowers? Or is that something that can be worked on?
[The following post is courtesy of our homegirls over at YourTango. Well, their male perspective. They’ve been through it all and know just about everything about love, so we thought we’d bring their expertise to you. Enjoy!]
I am an aficionado of the kiss. No other act is so simple and so intimate. The light suction, the flick of the lip, the playful nibble, the deep advance and retreat of the tongue—a good kiss is like jazz, an improvisation of melodies, flirtatious staccatos, and passionate brassy crescendos. A good kiss is a rapport enacted physically, like sex, but more erotic.
Many women don’t realize this. I’ve been surprised at how many treat kissing like it really is “first base,” just a step towards something better. And when I meet such women, I face a dilemma, like being a music lover who discovers that a new friend has bad taste. Do you break it off, or do you educate? And if you educate, how do you give lessons without giving offense? Read More »
While you can’t really have sex without making out first, you can totes make out without having sex. Which makes making out hot no matter what time of the month it is. I don’t know about you, but there’s very few firsts in any sort of relationship (be it one that goes long-term or just the random boy you meet at the bar) that are more memorable than that first hot makeout session. Here’s why: Read More »
[The following post is courtesy of our homegirls over at 
[This post is courtesy of our gal pal, 
I’ve had quite a few first kisses.
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