Cosmo, not one to miss out on a trend, also felt the need in their April edition to give the new prez some props—in their own special way. Hence, we were treated to a wonderful dissection by the great Dr. Ian Kerner, whose recent box office success apparently qualifies him to comment on the First Relationship…and its sex life.

Yes, my loves, Cosmo says this month: “Why the Obama’s Love is So Sexy”!

On Physicality
Cosmo says: “Seeing them hold hands and kiss reminds me of how important touch is outside the bedroom. Hugs can take you where words can’t.”

Kari says: I’m either going to needlepoint that hugs quote onto a pillow or make it my Facebook status. I guess I can see why people touching each other is sexy, but this headline led me to believe that there would be more witticisms like “let’s just say they danced together at the inaugural balls in a way that implied the real fun would begin later.” Quite frankly I’m disappointed that more justice was not done to the phrase “inaugural balls,” so bring on the juicy stuff, Cosmo.

On Mystery
Cosmo says: That in order for a long-term relationship to stay strong, we need to “balance the two poles of knowingness and mystery.” Also, becoming “more known and dependent on your partner” poses a serious threat to this “magical unknowingness.”

Kari says: I wonder if Stephenie Meyer has started writing for Cosmo (really? “Magical unknowingness”? Does Obama sparkle in the bedroom?). Besides quoting Obama from a 1996 interview in which he gushes over Michelle’s awesome-ness, Cosmo gives very little insight into how B and M walk this fine line. I suppose it’s probably classified, but if the kind of mystery they’re talking about is Barack poring over Area 51 files for bedtime reading then I don’t think that this couple is a necessarily good model for the general readership of Cosmo…

On Individuation
Cosmo Says: By preserving separate identities, Michelle hasn’t gotten “caught up in [her] relationship and live[ed] through it.” And even though she put her career on hold, she’s totes still her own person.

Kari says: Uh, Cosmo, IDK if you noticed, but being the First Lady in and of itself could possibly be considered a job. I mean, I know that I wouldn’t consider it work to travel all over the country for 21 months making public appearances, trying to raise two young daughters, having my entire life and relationship picked apart by the media and looking f**king fabulous doing it, but some people might. And it’s probably easy to “individuate” yourself from your husband when you have to share him with the rest of the free world, just sayin’.

On Adventure
Cosmo says: “They get out a lot.”

Kari says: Yes, I too try to keep “a strong circle of friends” and “look for new experiences” with my boyfriend, but sadly we are limited by our financial situation and the fact that we’re not, you know, the leader of our country. Possibly if Obama could lend me use of Airforce One for a week or two, my relationship can be “as sexy and compelling” as…my president’s.

The wise Dr. Kerner concludes with his declaration that the Obama’s have a great sex life—“and [he] doesn’t know when he’s been able to say that about a presidential couple—ever.” I guess Kerner’s sexpertism was predated by the Kennedy’s (and Marilyn Monroe). Anywho, I’m down with Cosmo’s tips for keeping the love alive…I’m just not so sure that using one of the most powerful couples in the free world as a model was quite the right decision for a mag that would usually run this story on someone like Heidi Klum and Seal.

However I suppose I can rest assured knowing that my president has a passionate relationship and not concern myself with how he plans to end the 7 year war my country is entangled in, or how he plans to correct the dismal state of our economy, or ponder how he has time to fill out presidential brackets on ESPN. A little less March Madness might have prevented this…

Sure he might have botched the oath a smidge, but with a speech like that, who cares? With all the inaugural balls he had to juggle, his Tuesday night definitely topped mine. I must say, both the President and the First Lady looked stunning! This may be the hottest Commander-in-Chief since JFK! There’s a lot riding on Mr. President this term.

There are plenty of things we’d like to see change and it looks like this administration might make it happen.

Other than that, the week was pretty standard. Gossip Girl and The City made their weekly appearances in our living rooms, and I had a quick chat with Brody Jenner. You know, the usual. Maybe I can lure him to be Valentine this year. Ah, wishful thinking. Chances are I’ll spend V-day alone rocking out to jams that I will never admit to listening to. Such is life…

When Denzel Washington introduced the President and his wife and they walked in to the traditional “Hail to the Chief,” I got goosebumps! The President and First Lady’s first dance had me crying like a single girl during “Breakfast at Tiffany’s.” And her dress!! I want to get married in that dress!

The Inaugural Ball was all glitz and glamour, and as I sat on my couch with my boys Ben and Jerry in tow, all I could do was wish I was there. Wish that I was lavishly dressed in a Jason Wu gown as opposed to my overly-used Hofstra sweatpants, oversized sweatshirt and fuzzy socks. Wish that I was dancing with a successful, handsome man instead of snuggling up to my teddy bear. Wish that I was eating some freakin delicious dinner instead of Ramen. Wish that Beyonce sang a song just for me, instead of me dancing around to her jams in my underwear with my hairbrush. Wish that 1,000 people would come out to celebrate my life, instead of sitting home trying to friend people on Facebook.

But, alas, I am not Barack Obama. Or Michelle Obama. Or any Obama. I was an Obama voter, though. That’s gotta be something, right?

Embracing your sexuality is…well, sexy!

World’s most AMAZING balm…just look.

Our next First Lady on the cover of Vogue…wow!

A BritneyJustinMadonna threesome?! It’s not what you think

Dave Chapelle sitings! Is he making a come back?!

Don’t like the outcome for Prop 8? Don’t pay taxes, like Melissa Ethridge.

I’m not big on whiskey…but if you are, here you go.

We’ve all been there…here’s how to avoid that horrible food coma.

Music heals all…here’s a list to get you through this financial EFF UP we are going throuh.

This was a week for decisions. Major decisions. And boy, did we make them. We elected Barack Obama as the 44^th (and first African-American) President of the United States. And though we didn’t directly choose Michelle Obama (or any of the First Ladies), we did decide who’s hot and who’s not.  We chose between working out at the gym and at home, between babes and nerds, between trendy skirts and patterned leggings. On the relationship side of things, we decided to make the jump from friends to lovers, and subsequently from lovers back to friends. We learned that guys get off on porn (really?), and girls become more fertile by watching Sex and the City. We decided that you shouldn’t spend too much money on dating, and on the proper prep work for losing your v-card.

And now that it’s Friday, take a break from all the deliberations and enjoy the weekend!

We’re just 8 days away from what will be one of the most historic elections in history, and definitely the most historic in our lifetime. So in the spirit of the impending election my Style Idol of the week is the woman who could very well be our first lady come January: Michelle Obama.

Being touted as the Jackie O of our generation, Michelle combines classic elegance and grace with modern touches, like chunky turquoise necklaces and studded belts. She goes for simple ensembles that aren’t over-accesorized, and she appeals to women across America by wearing clothes that are affordable for the average female. Michelle has the ability to mix it up, still look flawless, and resinspire the American woman’s love for a string of pearls and a tailored suit.

No matter what happens on November 4th, Michelle Obama is a winner on my fashion ballot.

Golf cart or electric car? It doesn’t matter! It’s adorable!

Video: Only Paris Hilton’s best friend would be the kinda girl to release a sex tape, get butt implants, then pose naked…just like her mother.

On Tom Cruise: “He taps into the zeitgeist,” says Cruise’s business partner, Paula Wagner. He also taps into crazy. And delusional.

Five minute nose job? I need it now!

Missed L.A. Ink this season? Let us catch you up!

Hey, everyone! New buzzword for 2008! FLILF! Yeah…it’s kinda gross to me too.

Chocolate gold or chocolate gold? It’s up to you!

Arkansas man nearly throws away a million little girl’s dreams. Or a 4.3 carat diamond. Whatever.

Is oral sex really ‘sex’? Let us know what you think!