We all know the infamous Nair song, “Who Wears Short Shorts?!”

Not me.

I’ve never really been a fan of shorts, namely because they never were really a fan of me. The ones that were considered in style were too short and all others looked like I was a mom out of 1987. They made me look chubbier, they gave me a camel toe (which is reason right there to hate them: “is your crotch hungry, girl ’cause it’s eating your pants”), and they were just so unflattering. And even worse, when you don’t have sticks for legs and you walk around a humid city in shorts, your legs rub together. Cute shorts or not, that is just a whole other level of uncomfortable that I’d rather not deal with. Then you have to start waddling, then your shorts ride up you pull them down and it looks like you are picking out a front wedgie…

It’s just bad news all over.

But not any more! Ladies, grab that Nair, forget about its heinous rotten egg smell (yummmy!), and get your legs r-e-a-d-y.

This season there are so many shorts in so many lengths that you CAN find a pair that works for you. Trust me, if I can find a pair I love, then lord knows you can too. And you don’t have to shell out the big bucks for bottoms that you can only wear 3 months out of the year in most parts of the country. Can I get a “what, what”?!

Here are my picks for cute, cheap and most-likely-to-be flattering shorts. High waisted and linen are great with wedges for day or night, bermudas are best worn with a high shoe, and colored bottoms are only for those who don’t mind attention in that area. And for those hot, casual days – pair a casual short with a tank top, long necklace and some flip flops and you’re good. to. go.

Bring on the shorts! (Click on the images below for all the deets.) Read More »

“Hey mami…you lookin’ good girrrrrrl.”

Yep. I hear it. Daily. All I want to do is walk to the store and grab a red bull, and instead, I’m solicited by men I wouldn’t touch with a stick. It never matters what I’m wearing, if my hair is greasy, if my face is breaking out, or even if I’m with another guy.

The cat caller team is relentless. They slow their cars and roll down their windows while passing me by. They halt conversation and stare at my ass with such intensity that I can FEEL it. All that I want to know is…where the f*ck do they think this is going to get them?

Should I cancel my plans, hop in their cars, and give them head? And why the hell am I their MAMI? Since when is it sexy to be YOUR mami? Last time I checked, that’s incestuous and not really flattering at all.

As a general rule of thumb, guys, don’t comment to girls on the street about how they look. You might have great intentions with it, but at the end of the day it is rude. Not only is it rude, but it is also awkward. What do you want her to say?

“Thank you for being a creep?” Read More »