One might make a case that my own writing frequently belongs on that list. But that is because “one” has probably never seen this one.

As if to highlight how utterly retarded it is, the name of the blog (or the blog user? or both?) is Text in the City. WOW. Lame times ten.

The actual blog, however, is far lamer yet. Judging from the title and the subject matter, one is to assume this blog considers itself a takeoff of that popular and influential show, Sex and the City… except they did it with an “in” instead of an “an” (amateurs). While I myself am not a fan of said show, I do recognize the attempt to say things in a way that have never been said before on TV. Text in the City, on the other hand, is a bland regurgitation of womens’ self-help guides from the 50′s updated with the idioms of the new millennium (at least, sort of updated).

At Text in the City, you will learn the “10 Secret Things Every Man Wants.” Wow, really? Great! I have an idea, Text in the City; why don’t you write the blandest, most annoying possible things (for instance, booking a spa day for yourself so you can leave him alone at #1 on the list) in the most mediocre way possible (“We love excitement, and we are not just talking about in the bedroom.”)? That would be cool. Wow, Text in the City, you’re the most awesome thing ever!

But that’s not all! Text in the City goes from bland to downright insulting. In “Wanna Spring Fling?” (which is already retarded), we are reminded that, and I quote:

Giving up your individual identity, and not continuing to be the person who attracted the other party in the first place, is the quickest path to breakup city! Stay that same amazing person you were the first time you both met.

Wow. Insightful! I always thought changing for a man was the way to go!

And then we have “Spicing It Up in the Bedroom,” perhaps the worst one of all. In this little gem, Text in the City breaks down all the types of guys (for instance, “the Bad Boy” and “the Artist”) and tells you what kind of pajamas to wear. I’m not even kidding. For instance, and I shiz you not:

The Prep:

An Ivy League look will graduate you to the top of the class. Your man loves the wrapping on the present almost as much as the gift itself. Conservative, cute and sexy, that’s what will sail his yacht. The top must match the bottom in this case. So, slip into some cotton pajamas that highlight your curves, a t-shirt and boxer combo for hot summer nights, or if he is really in the mood, make him crazy with a classic lace bra and panty set.

Hot and brilliant advice. Because only a preppy boy would like a girl in lacy undies.

The thing that really gets me about this blog is its blatant immaturity in matters of love. Women don’t all want the same thing. Men can’t be broken down into quadrants and satisfied by type.

I am an independent woman and seeing content like this just makes me so. effing. angry. It makes women look pathetic for writing this stuff and for sending the message that women want to read this stuff. Fortunately, Text in the City seems to have stopped being written in 2007, but its irritating legacy of crap lives on.

What’s the worst blog you’ve ever read? Is it crappier than Text in the City?!