I watch reality TV like it’s my j-o-b. If there is an unscripted show on TV (or sorta unscripted, a la MTV), I’ll watch it. And DVR it. And talk about it at length with my friends like these people are our friends.

Yes, even “Groomer Has It.” I have a problem.

But would I ever be on a reality show? Hell to the no. As fun as potentially melting down in front of millions of people at home sounds, I’d much rather be the one on my couch – bowl of brownie batter in hand – than the one being cut, manipulated and edited into some freak show for America’s enjoyment. And there are way too many things that I do on a daily basis that I would never (ever, ever, ever) want caught on camera.

Like the fact that I make brownie batter and eat it without cooking it. With my fingers. Or the awful farts I get after eating too much brownie batter. (Seriously, I don’t even want to witness that….it’s really the last thing America needs to watch.)

This week I asked the CollegeCandy writers to share the things they do that they’d rather not have broadcast nationwide. Their secret alone moments. What are yours? Read More »

Today’s the day, people! It’s Halloween, and there are only a few more precious hours left to get a costume together before nightfall. If you’re still scrambling to assemble the perfect outfit, don’t fret: we at College Candy have a few ideas for quick, easy Halloween get-ups that you can throw together in between classes today. You shouldn’t need anything more than an old t-shirt or sweatshirt, some Sharpies, and a little intuition.

1. Superhero

Take an old t-shirt or sweatshirt (preferrably solid-colored) and draw the logo of your favorite superhero on the chest with Sharpie. If you want to go the extra mile and you have a little time, pick up some felt and thread from a nearby craft store or Target to sew the logo on. I actually did this myself one year and it took about 30 minutes. Throw a belt around your hips and pull on some leggings to complete the look.

2. Gangsta

This may take some rummaging through a guy’s closet, but it should be easy to pull off. Just find an oversize white shirt, baggy jeans, some boxers, and a pair of sneakers. Put in one diamond (or cubic zirconia) stud earring. For neck bling, if you don’t have any oversize necklaces yourself, grab some tin foil and roll it into a loop big enough to fit over your head (you can also use tin foil to make some makeshift grills- just fold it over your teeth). Use some black eyeliner to draw a sun reflecting patch under just one eye (like football players wear). If you wanna take it a step further and be a “wanksta,” use some eyeshadow to make it look like you’ve got a black eye.

3. God’s Gift to Men

This one is really simple. Dress yourself however you like, but make sure you look fine. Then just take some ribbon and tie a bow around yourself (around your hips, over the shoulder, etc.) and affix a large tag using construction paper that says: “To: Men, From: God.” Simple, sexy, and clever as hell.

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The other day a friend of mine counted the amount of times I used the word douche. The number was shockingly high, something like 20 times within a half an hour. This got me thinking….I was either very irrate about something and was on a ranting rampage, OR there are many types of doucheness. So, I thought I would break it down so you too can put to use this fantastic word.

Webster’s Definition of DOUCHE:

The true definition of douche is: a jet or current of water, sometimes with a dissolved medicating or cleansing agent, applied to a body part, organ, or cavity for medicinal or hygienic purposes. or; to use a douche or douches; undergo douching. Vaginal douches may consist of water, water mixed with vinegar, or even antiseptic chemicals.

Okay. FIRST OF ALL…Does that sound painful to anyone else? Have any of you actually tried this? I’d really like to know.

My Definition of a DOUCHE:

Here’s the thing, douche has its varieties and I’ll have to break them down for you.

RICH DOUCHE:

The rich douche usually will do something like order your meal for you at dinner while saying something patronizing about what color lipstick you’re wearing and how it clashes with your dress. Rich douches usually say snide things about poor douches and visa versa. He most likely has Daddy’s money or Daddy’s company, and has dated his fair share of waify blondes wearing pearls. The rich douche would never enjoy a divey pub or roll around in the grass with a Labrador, instead he’ll have a greyhound and think pubs are for Irish invalids. Take him to The Palm or he’ll just go hungry. Read More »