I am sure a little part of all of us wanted to be famous at one point in our lives.  A little piece of my heart wants to sing on ‘American Idol,’ design a dress for an Olympian figure skater (kudos, Vera Wang), or get insulted by Kanye West on live television.  Whichever way you put it, being famous does not seem that bad…but the getting there is tough.  Unless you are Justin Bieber whose ‘getting there’ involved a YouTube video and a cute haircut. Needless to say, I am impressed.

But besides YouTube, there are other ways you can become famous in lightning bolt fashion. If you long to walk red carpets, get chased by paparazzi and rub elbows with Hollywood’s A-listers, take a little advice from these fameballs on how to get real famous, real fast.

Get Fat (Kirsti Alley, Kevin Federline)
It’s been a long time since the woman who found fame on Cheers and later stole my heart in Look Who’s Talking (one of my favorite adolescent movies out there) was the topic of pop culture conversation. That is until she got fat. Then skinny. Then graced the tabloid covers once again grasping a donut and looking into the camera lens with 10 double chins. And now Kirstie’s showing up on Oprah, starting her own weight loss line (??) and starring in, Kirstie Alley’s Big Life, a reality show about her quest to lose weight. Again. Read More »

Recently, in a bright exchange of words I like to call a meaningful conversation, my good friend and I pondered about various famous men we lusted after in middle school.  Once Ricky Martin and his taut cheeks came up in the mix, we drooled and pondered about how he also liked men with taut butt cheeks.  Then we really got to thinking and grew depressed at the disappointment of the day Lance Bass took a giant leap out of the closet (even though it wasn’t the most surprising news we’d ever received).

The bright side? I hadn’t thought of Ricky Martin since shaking my bon-bon in my parents’ basement at the respectable age of 13. His coming out lifting him from obscurity and catapulted him back to the level of his days sipping out of the Cup of Life. I was hearing about him virtually everywhere. Ricky Martin hid from fame for so long and with his news, came out of a closet and basked in US Weekly glory, paycheck after paycheck.

Coming out in Hollywood is like working overtime.  It’s the key to success for has-been A-listers, a chance to return to relevance and once again soak up the limelight.  Look at Lindsay Lohan for instance; she didn’t need her leggings line anymore once she started toting DJ Samantha Ron-Hizzle around.  And who needs the title of American Idol when you’re sporting eye liner and getting frisky with other dudes on stage like one Mr. Adam Lambert? And you know Lance Bass’s “I’m Gay” cover story took him from former boy-bander who no one remembered to insta-celebrity over night.

It’s true: going gay is the life jacket to Hollywood careers. It does what no publicist, Oscar nomination or incarceration could ever manage. It’s more powerful than a nipple slip, more potent than an ill-fitting stage ensemble, and more memorable than general douche-baggery. It’s the key to going from child-star-turned-Vegan-farmer to Reality TV Show host with endorsement deals and magazine covers to boot.

And keeping that in mind, I’m surprised Heidi Montag hasn’t gotten a girlfriend yet there are a few suspect D-Listers out there who might want to consider throwing open the doors of the closet they’ve been hiding in. We haven’t seen or heard much from these peeps in awhile, but that’s nothing that an “I’m Gay” won’t fix. You can thank us later, Hollywood. Read More »

I am sure a little part of all of us wanted to be famous at one point in our lives.  A little piece of my heart wants to sing on American Idol, design a dress for an Olympian figure skater (kudos, Vera Wang), or get insulted by Kanye West on live television.  Whichever way you put it, being famous does not seem that bad…but the getting there is tough.  Unless you are Justin Bieber whose ‘getting there’ involved a YouTube video and a cute haircut. Needless to say I am impressed.

But besides YouTube, there are other ways you can become famous in lightning bolt fashion. If you long to walk red carpets, get chased by paparazzi and rub elbows with Hollywood’s A-listers, take a little advice from these fameballs on how to get real famous, real fast.

Get Fat (Kirsti Alley, Kevin Federline)
It’s been a long time since the woman who found fame on Cheers and later stole my heart in Look Who’s Talking (one of my favorite adolescent movies out there) was the topic of pop culture conversation. That is until she got fat. Then skinny. Then graced the tabloid covers once again grasping a donut and looking into the camera lens with 10 double chins. And now Kirstie’s showing up on Oprah, starting her own weight loss line (??) and starring in, Kirstie Alley’s Big Life, a reality show about her quest to lose weight. Again.

Read More »

When asked to choose their top goals, a survey of 18 to 25-year-olds yielded staggering statistics.

81% said: to get rich.

51% said: to be famous.

I don’t know about you guys, but this makes me squirm in my seat just a tad.

Sure, it’s understandable that a large number of people want to have a fat wallet and their face plastered all over newspapers. Actually it’s a little too obvious. Our generation certainly boasts an embarrassingly high number of public figures with absolutely zero talent or reason for being there. Just think about it, some of the most famous celebrities are reality stars who got famous for being normal people on national TV and occasionally throwing in a fist fight, indulging a cocktail binge or going through an incredibly messy divorce to spice things up.

With these figures being glorified by our society, of course there are going to be those who want to follow in their footsteps and get their 15 minutes. But aren’t these numbers a tad bit high? The main goal of 81% of college students is to be rich?! What about being happy? Having a family? Improving the world in some way?

Are we just lazy? Is that why the life of the rich and famous looks so appealing? Or do people actually consider “famous” an appropriate fill in for the blank next to “occupation”? Read More »