Abs like these by Sunday? OK, Self Magazine.

So Chicken Finger Wednesday at the dining hall has been less than kind to your mid-section this year. Maybe you’re a freshman, maybe you’re not, but whatever the case, you’re definitely seeing those fifteen extra pounds. Think that because you’ve got a little extra pudge, you can’t wear a midriff revealing, sexy costume?

Well, SELF Magazine would like to tell you that no, muffin tops and French Maids don’t really mesh. But they’ve got a little workout called the Witches Brew that’ll give you abs of steel by Halloween. As in this Halloween. As in October 31, 2010. As in three days from now.

While you’re stirring away at that cauldron of false dreams, we’d like to offer a few goals that are more realistic to achieve in seventy-two hours.

1. Track down Brad Pitt and convince him to marry you.
It can totally be done. Just look for a dude surrounded by ten kids and a skeletal superstar girlfriend. Convince his bodyguards he recently adopted you from an impoverished coal-mining town in West Virginia. And finally, get close enough to Brad so you can use every pick up line in your extensive collection. One of them is bound to work.

2. Build a car to take you trick-or-treating all over town.
And I’m not talking about some clunker. Italian sports cars are really the only way to go when you’re DIY-ing. Collect the necessary pieces from the junkyard and lay them out in your dorm room. Close your eyes and start hammering parts together. Sooner or later, a car should appear. Read More »

Hate how all the guys you know only lift weights a few times a week, skip the treadmill, eat twice as much as you, and still manage a 6-pack while you struggle to reveal any pack at all? Maybe it’s time to take a few tips from the boys!

As members of the fairer sex (holla!), we have some major obstacles to staying slim that guys will never have to deal with. The bloating and hormonal changes that come every month obviously suck. And the cravings don’t help us lose those extra pounds, either. While it’s true that both guys and girls get cravings, women are more likely to crave chocolates and sweets, whereas guys are more likely to crave meat (which happens to be filled with protein, makes you feel full longer and is generally better for your body). See the problem here? We should take a hint from the boys and switch to more protein-oriented snacks! Before reaching for the chocolate, go for some string cheese, a turkey and cheese wrap, or cottage cheese with fruit. If you’re still craving sweets after that, try mixing some protein with it – like almonds and chocolate chips. Read More »

The new year not only brings Jan 1st hangovers and regret over your choice for the midnight kiss, (who may still be lying next to you as you read this…) but also a plethora of New Year’s Resolutions. However I’ve discovered through extensive research and observation that there are certain resolutions that college students make and then break every. single. year. These are the top three New Years Resolutions that are forgotten by Groundhogs day.

1. Get in Shape

Whether it’s the fact that spring break is weeks away or that people over-indulged on holiday dips and homemade cooking, everyone comes back to school with overly-optimistic gym ambitions. Ellipticals that haven’t been used in months are suddenly turned on and counting calories. Everyone tries out the stairmaster once and a few braver people venture to the other side of the gym to lift weights. It’s always easy to identify the new-years-resolution-workouts; they are the people with the too-well matched gym outfits who do an amazingly intense workout for the first five minuntes and then spend the next 35 minutes walking and talking about being really serious about getting into shape. They chug their water, wipe off their nonexistent sweat and they’re never seen in the gym after January 31st. Read More »

Now that the holidays are over and my jeans are extra tight from the cookies and cakes I stuffed in my face the past week (I know you’re feeling it to0, ladies!), it’s time to start thinking about how to improve (and drop the holiday weight) for the New Year.

Instead of making that vague “I’m gonna work out this year!” resolution that never works, why not take a more focused approach? Here are a few resolutions that will get you on track for actually fulfilling your fitness goals in 2009. My opinion: start small:

- Start a Workout Program: If you don’t work out regularly, make it a point to do so. Join a gym (many have holiday specials still going on until Jan 1st!) and get into a routine where you hit the gym a few times a week. Don’t set an unrealistic goal (“I will run 10 miles, 4 days a week.”) – even if it’s just to start walking on a treadmill or taking a pilates class or two, you’ll never believe the difference it can make!

- Increase Your Workout: If you’re a regular, every day worker-outer like myself, start increasing your daily dose of exercise. For example, I normally run 1.5 – 2 miles a day and do ab work for about 15 minutes. Starting this week, I am upping my workouts to at least 2.5 – 3 miles a day with increased stretching and core focus on my abs to get that six pack (wishful thinking!) by the summer. Read More »

Is that…Brad Pitt?

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Oh Posh…you confuse me

Laugh your abs into shape

Heather Locklear’s arrest on tape

Amy Winehouse knows she’s effed

Celebrities need protection too, okay?

Katy Perry: trying too hard?