Like most people out there, I love and thoroughly enjoy a good orgasm. Honestly, who doesn’t?

Apparently, a lot of people. Cuz they’re not having ‘em.

I’ve had countless friends tell me that despite all the sex they’re having, they’ve yet to show their O face. And statistics show that around 43% of women have not experienced the pleasure of the big O.

How can this be?! There is an orgasm epidemic out there and I feel like I must do my part to put an end to this madness! I know I’m no doctor with a fancy PH.D, but I am a twenty-something woman who has (thankfully) gotten off enough to say a thing or two about the female orgasm. So here are a few steps that will lead you to pleasuretown (population: you!).

1. Get Comfortable: The first step may be the simplest. You just have to learn how to be 100% comfortable with yourself and your sexuality. Orgasms only come after you’re at a point where you can relax and let the sensations (or hot man) take over. How to reach a good comfort level? Get a tan or catch some rays. Grab a hand mirror and explore your southern territories. Keep a journal and be honest with yourself. You just have to find a way to feel beautiful and love yourself first.

2. Self-stimulation: Yes ladies, I’m talking about good ol’ masturbation. After all, why would anyone else want to have sex with you, if you don’t want to have sex with yourself? Grab a vibrator or turn on a naughty flick if you need the extra help.

3. Downward Dog It: Practice your yoga, ladies! You’ll learn a ton of positions such as lotus, downward dog, and crane. These will not only lead to a healthy, happier you, but they will also make you limber. Improved flexibility will allow you to explore more advanced sex positions that often lead to intensified orgasms.

4. Find a Mr. McSteamy: This one is pretty self-explanatory. But a little FYI: for many women, the more emotionally intimate you are with a sex partner, the more deep and intense the orgasm. Don’t expect Mr. Let’s Go Back to My Place For a Wham Bam Thank You Maam to give you your first O.

5. Speak Up: Who knows your body better than you do? No one. Well, at least not until you tell them. Be vocal with your partner if you’ve been sexing it up without any grand finale. Tell them, show them! Just let them know what feels good and what you enjoy the best.

So if you’re one of the 43% that hasn’t O’ed yet, don’t worry. Follow some of these steps and hopefully you’ll have the toe-curling event that we all deserve.

Masturbation. Couldn’t someone think of a cooler term to describe getting yourself off? It sounds so … mechanical.

Regardless of the actual word, I masturbate. Yeah, I said it. And sadly, most girls really won’t throw it out there like that. For some reason guys can just talk about jerking off as if it’s part of their morning routine — “I brushed my teeth, took a shower, wacked off, got dressed and went to class.”

Um, that never happens if you’re a girl. It’s more like, “I’m heading to bed early tonight” a.k.a. “I’m horny and I have a date with my vibrator.” Sure, my friends and I have had that conversation where you let the cat out of the bag, and they all admit it too. But there’s always that friend who’s like, “Guys, that’s gross, I don’t do that.”

Yeah, right! How the hell have you never touched yourself? It’s part of being a girl; it’s only natural to explore your body. And if you want to enjoy sex, you should seriously learn what turns you on.

So for all of you that are in denial of your female anatomy and afraid of getting a little “dirty,” I found a great article to help you out. Just read it. Give yourself an orgasm and learn what you’ve been missing.