First, let’s just acknowledge that this is real life. Snooki, whatcha got goin’ on there? I can’t tell if you’re dancing with the plant for laughs, or if you’re actually trippin’ balls in public. Better yet, I can’t tell why someone hasn’t set this to a sick tecno beat yet!

But really, Snooki does not look like she even knows what day of the week it is. Clearly no one could have selected that ensemble (ugh, those boots!) with a sober mind. Girlfriend, if you need help, please go seek it. Don’t make your next reality debut be on A&E’s Intervention.