For a lot of my life, I’ve been a religious person. I went on mission trips every summer with my church, I was on my church’s Youth Board, and I attended mass every Sunday (oh yeah, I’m Catholic). So when I got to college, one of the first things I did was to see what campus ministries were available. While other girls were rolling out of bed at 1:00 pm on Sundays and going for a hungover brunch, I was in the student cinema with about a hundred other students praising God.

Because I became so involved with my campus ministry, I met a lot of friends with my same beliefs and morals. While this shouldn’t be a problem in my life, it became one almost from the very beginning. Once people find out that I’m religious, they start to make a lot false assumptions about myself, as well as my friends.

Assumption #1: We are holier than thou

The first thing I always hear is that we are “holier than thou.”  I’ve learned through my experiences that a lot of other Christians have trouble going to church. They say that if they went, it would make them feel like they have to act holy all the time. So this makes it even difficult for me to really express everything I feel about God. I don’t want people pointing out examples of how I’m not leading the most holy life. And I’ll be the first to admit, sometimes it’s easier for me to pick one persona or another. Either the quiet, Christian girl who won’t talk about her problems or the troubled party-goer. A lot of people will argue that it’s not worth going to church because all the pews are filled with a bunch of hypocrites. Sure it’s a valid point, but they’re forgetting why we go to church in the first place.

We go to church because frankly, we aren’t good at being a holy people. We need God (because we aren’t perfect), so we seek Him in church. My friends and I are just like you and we won’t judge you because you might make different choices than us. I have never condemned people for their life choices, because that is one thing the Bible tells us to never do. What it does tell us to do is love everyone. As a Christian, I try to view people as God views them – with unconditional love.

Assumption #2: We don’t party

Another annoying assumption people make when they learn I’m religious and very active in my church is that I don’t party. Although the Bible tells me to not drink in excess (and I don’t drink 24/7), it doesn’t mean that I don’t drink and don’t go to parties. I would even be lying if I said I haven’t gone to church with a hangover. Some of us party, and some of us don’t, but don’t assume either way. Rather, find out by asking us. Every time friends from class ask me what I’m doing during the upcoming weekend and I say I’m going to a party thrown by a friend from church, they laugh. They picture us playing Scrabble and cuddled up under Snuggies. Not true.

Some of my most fun parties have been thrown by my church friends.  So yes I do go clubbing, I do go to parties. Just because I love God doesn’t mean I don’t also love to shout Gaga lyrics to the top of my lungs and dance like crazy while laughing and holding a Coors in my hand.

Assumption #3: We are all conservative

Finally, the assumption I face almost daily is people assuming that I’m conservative because of my Catholic beliefs. Not true.  The fact of the matter is I don’t discuss politics. What I will do, is listen to what you have to say, and if you want to talk about whether I agree with you or not, we can talk in person about it. Heck, I don’t even mind if we don’t really know each other and you want to hear my opinion about something. Even if you do sit down with me and talk to me about stuff like that, I’m nice to everyone. Like I said earlier, I was taught to love everyone, regardless of different beliefs. If you ask me how I feel, I’ll tell you, and there is no way you will ever change my mind about the topic, but I will say it calmly and don’t mind getting into friendly debates. I will never shut you down because you disagree with something I believe in. Because peace is essential to Christianity, and as a Christian I know that isn’t the way to change someone’s mind.

Why do I go to church?

So why do I go to church while in college? As silly as it sounds, it’s really relaxing to go to church on Sunday mornings and have an hour that is worry-free. For that hour classes, exams, etc. don’t matter. The only thing that matters is I am celebrating God. So it keeps me grounded and gives me a short break from all of my stress. Church is also a great place to meet friends and I-wanna-be-more-than-friends. Through my campus ministry I found friends with similar beliefs, passions, and lifestyles. We’ve been able to get really close because we’ve participated in lots of different activities with each other on a weekly basis. I met my boyfriend through my ministry, and we get along fantastically because we already agree on fundamental things. I go to church because unlike my friends who say college is for taking a break from religion, you can’t take a short “break” from religious life. You can’t just put it on hold until you’re “ready.” College is a time for growing, and learning. I take it upon myself to learn more about my faith on my own and stop depending on my parents for pushing me to do so. I go to church because I know I need it; I know I still have a lot of growing to do.

Everyone would have us believe (even some of the writers on this website) that college is a constant party and orgy, but that isn’t so. College is about finding yourself, and becoming more of who you always were (but didn’t realize it). As college students, we are all wanderers, forced out of our homes and into the real world. We wander until we discover what it is we want to do with our lives, and we succeed or we fail. We move forward, whether we know where we are headed or not. So while I am always wandering, I am never lost, because my religion helps guide my college experience.

We got your back, Ryan Seacrest!

Meagan still wants a millionaire. And VH1 will oblige.

We’re lovin’ DKNY’s fall collection.

There are lots of songs about balls….

Is God going gender neutral in the Bible?

Cheap, amazing dorm room DIY.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

Hugging the Bowl:

You started the evening out with the girls and a few shots of vodka to the tune of Bon Jovi blaring from the stereo. Then you moved onto the party, where you couldn’t not play 10 rounds of flip cup, followed by a game of beer pong. You were feeling good – really good – so you decided to give into the boys and do a keg stand.

After all, you had to show them what you’re made of.

When your feet are firmly back on the ground it hits you: you are totally f**ked up. The room is spinning, the floor is rocking and all you can think about is getting home and dying.

But you don’t want anyone to think you are a wimp (because you’re not!), so you pull one of the girls aside and whisper, “I’m tired. I think I’m gonna go,” which comes out more like, “I’m <hiccup> tiiiired. I <hiccup> mthink I’mgomna <vurp> go.” Your friend offers to go with you.

You stumble home, run straight to the bathroom and strip down to your bra and underwear. Your friend brings you water in the bathroom as you crouch over the toilet and start spitting into the bowl. Your knees hurt already, but you are not leaving the bathroom until you puke, dammit.

Your head hurts. You feel like hell. You are never EVER drinking again. Please God, you pray, if you let me make it through tonight I will never drink this much again. Please god. PLEASE. I swear. No more alcohol. Ever.

And at that moment, you mean it.

You keep spitting into the toilet, opening your mouth and willing something other than saliva to come out. You try pulling the trigger (hey, it works for bulimics!), chugging water, or anything else that just might bring up all that beer.

You give up hope, grab the garbage can and begin to head back to your room when – YES! – it comes. Lots and lots of it. Beer, vodka, and the Jimmy Johns #6 you scarfed down for dinner. Vomiting has never felt so good. You welcome the heaves, celebrate the bile, and as quickly as it started you are done.

You are sweating. There are tears in your eyes, but sweet Jesus you feel great.

You pour yourself a glass of water, brush your teeth, grab the garbage can and head to your room where you quickly pass out.

When you wake up in the morning you feel great, and after some scrambled eggs and toast you are ready to hit the bottle again.

Come back next week for more moments of misery that we can all share. Like all those damn drunk texts.

1. I regret that time I met a guy at a bar and did some naughty things at a very public table. That other people may have been sitting at. And the bar also happened to be a restaurant. And it was definitely not sanitary.

2. I regret purchasing condoms while drunk and choosing that the ones that glow in the dark/have spikes “for her enjoyment.” I did not enjoy them that night, nor did I enjoy the way those spikes made me feel for the next 3 days.

3. I regret thinking hooking up in a boy’s bathroom was “hot” – it was not. In fact, it was dirty, moldy and didn’t have a lock. So, with that, I regret that guy’s roommates walking in and getting quite a show.

4. I regret hooking up in my roommate’s bed because she then hooked up in my bed in retaliation…and made a much bigger mess.

5. I regret keeping my hot stilettos on during a particularly wild romp that led to a giant gouge in my wall and a large, bloody gash down my man’s back.

I know I am not alone in making poor hook up decisions. What are your biggest regrets?

When the God Rocker thing didn’t work out, Katy decided to go in a completely different direction.  Her pseudo-lesbian song, combined with lots of boob shots, has put Katy Perry on the cover of Blender magazine as well as on the pages of gossip blogs everywhere.

So what are we to learn from this transformation?  Boobs trump God?  Image is everything?  A catchy beat can make you a star?

One thing we do know is that no matter how much Perry wears them, high waisted booty shorts are never finding a place in our wardrobe.

But we just might reconsider our devotion if reports like this keep coming out.

According to PrettyBoring, our precious Piven was “doing his best” to mack on 19-year-old Hayden Panettiere at some post-Emmy party a few weeks back. Although there’s no source linked out to the report, if this is true, we will be pissed because A) Hayen in 19 years old. We’re in our mid-twenties, Piven can totally make us his May-December, but he should really stay away from a girl who is still two years too young to legally drink, and B) she’s already in a relationship with that weird looking guy from Heroes. Everyone knows that.

Lots of people who write blogs seem to think J. Piv is a prime assh*le. We’re going to hold out until there’s actual taped proof (you know how some people won’t believe in God until they see his face in a grilled cheese sandwich?), and until that day…we’ll love every possibly smarmy inch of him.

But that is the unfortunate truth for some Church-goers in L.A.

You would never guess by looking at her, but it seems that Heidi Montag is quite a religious little lady. And she’s bringing Spencer along for the ride. Sure, she values boobs over life and has probably broken all 10 commandments…daily, but she loves God! And church! And (getting Chanel bags for) Christmas!

Anyways, Pratt recetly revealed his new love for Jesus in an interview with Us Weekly.

“I’m a work in progress. I’d never been to church until I met Heidi,” he tells Yo on E!. “She got me to go — it was a big step. The walls shook a little bit as I first cruised in, but Jesus and I are making the connection.

“I’m trying to live a more positive, holy life, but it takes work,” he adds. “It’s hard not sinning, you know?”

I didn’t know churches let people like Spencer in. And I know Jesus loves everyone, but Spencer Pratt? I get this feeling he may make an exception for him. I mean, this dude made a deal with the devil and is poisoning the world with his….everything.

Let’s just hope this new religious leaf Spencer is turning over will change him. And not in a, “Heidi is making a Christian album” sort of way.

Please, God, don’t let it happen.

(Note: I can’t believe I just wrote a post with the words “Jesus” and “Spencer Pratt” in it. Forgive me for I have sinned.)

Look for common ground.

In today’s modern world, even religious leaders are beginning to emphasize the common ties of religion rather than the differences. It’s important for you to learn to do the same, if you really want to make it work with a guy. If one of you is Protestant and the other Catholic, you’re already halfway there toward reconciliation, really; the fundamental points of doctrine are the same. If you’re interested in religious discussion, make an effort to point out where you agree. For example, Jesus is a prophet and a holy figure in Islam as well as Christianity. Sufis and Buddhists agree that meditation techniques are important for reaching higher spiritual states. Jews and Muslims agree about dietary restrictions and the importance of respecting God through very similar laws. There’s common ground for everyone!

Respect differences.

Anyone who is a proud member of a religion clearly holds that religion’s tenets and practices dearly. If you like to drink but your boyfriend doesn’t on principle, it’s unwise to try forcing him. Religious traditions go back centuries and not everyone wants to quickly abandon family traditions or practices just to be more likeable or easier to date. A meaningful Serious Relationship is built on mutual respect. That also works in the other direction, though — if your boyfriend/girlfriend has expectations of you based on his/her religion, you have no obligation to fulfill them! So, for example, respect his choice not to eat pork, but don’t give up bacon just because he doesn’t like it. If he can’t respect your choice, it’s unfair.

Talk.

A great deal of the conflicts among religions in the wider sphere are caused by misunderstandings. That’s true on the individual level too! Before you become alarmed that your guy is a different faith than yours, ask questions about what he believes in. He may be able to dispel common misconceptions or urban legends about his religion. You may have a lot more in common than you thought.

Make your choice.

When it comes down to it, if you’re really invested in the Serious Relationship, then it’s important to think seriously about whether you’re willing to be involved in an interfaith relationship. Is it truly important to you to be with someone of the same faith? Or are you flexible on that score? By being honest about what you want, you may be able to learn a great deal about your boy or girlfriend, and gain insight into a world you thought you’d never understand. That alone is worth trying for, if you’re willing to be open-minded about it.

[Photo courtesy of nationalcenter.org]

I was raised to believe that there was a god, one god, and that Jesus Christ was his son. I accepted him into my ‘heart’ and was baptized at an early age. Then I was taught that anyone who didn’t move forward with those two procedures was going to go to Hell; even if they were a good person. Oh, Hell. The fiery pit where bad people burn with the devil.

I once believed this place was real and I could quote scriptures from The Bible as my own little way of reassuring myself that I wasn’t gonna be one of those bad people going to that bad place. I prayed when things weren’t going my way and I prayed when things were going my way. Come to think of it, I spent more time chatting it up with God when I was young than I did my friends.

I knew nothing about earning money, but I knew you were a selfish person if you didn’t give at least 10% of your income to God and your church. I knew that Halloween was for Satan and witches, that Jewish people believed in the same God that I did but were still going to Hell, and that Pulp Fiction was a very, VERY demonic movie that I was never allowed to see.

When I entered adolescence, I started to embrace my Christianity in new ways. I listened to rock bands who screamed lyrics you couldn’t understand…but they were Christian, so it was okay. I wore punky clothes and was straight edge. A straight edge jerk, judging everyone I knew who did drugs or drank or — god forbid — had sex.

I attended three different churches growing up and met all sorts of Christians. Good ones, bad ones, and everything in between. But, as most Christians will be quick to remind you, Christianity is about Christ-not Christians. So let’s forget about the massive churches who have Starbucks booths in their lobbies. Lets forget about the way a person can so eloquently damn another person to Hell, but with compassion. Lets talk about Christ, according to The Bible.

No matter how liberal you’d like to be with your beliefs, that book is still pretty clear about the fact that believing in this guy, Jesus, is the way to save your soul. And the only way. Crazily enough, that was okay with me…until I started meeting people who weren’t Christian. Good people who were more devoted to their respective religions than I ever was started to stand out to me in a crowd. The message of Christ — of peace and love — started to speak much louder than the rules and regulations of religion.

Slowly, but surely, I stopped believing in everything but the peace, love, and golden rule concepts. I started to believe that no religion was absolutely wrong or absolutely right. I started to accept the fact that The Bible was written by humans and no matter how divine their passages may have been, humans are still humans. Eventually, I found myself where I stand today.

I stand in a place where I do not believe in Heaven or Hell. And even if those places did exist, I certainly don’t believe in worshipping a god who would send good people to a torturous place just because they didn’t ‘accept Jesus into their heart’. I believe that there may be something greater than us; in fact, I believe that there probably is. But that doesn’t mean I believe in a god. I just believe that we’re humans and we don’t know the answers. Even if we all collectively contributed our religious experiences to a new religious book, I still do not believe we’d get it right. I do not believe we’re capable of this.

I know that religion means a lot to a lot of people. I am not trying to make a laughing matter of it — particularly not after the years I spent devoted to it. However, I’m much happier now in this place in my life where I can live with an open mind and not have to have even one friend in my social circle who I feel like I need to ‘save’. I’m much happier here with a Pulp Fiction poster on the wall in my living room. I’m much happier having met the guys in the Christian rock bands I once worshipped and having seen that they do cocaine, they have sex with groupies; they are not flawless. I much happier with Halloween.

I don’t believe in absolutes anymore, except for the absolute that that lifestyle was wrong for me.

[Photo courtesy of daretoshare.org.]

It was big and complicated and hush hush. If I was watching a movie with my parents and the PG rating went just a little too far, my mom would start talking loudly – signaling that whatever was happening onscreen wasn’t for my eyes. My Catholic priest would stand on the pulpit every Sunday, telling me that God was always watching, and every time I did something (or thought something) not good, He would know. Sex was probably bad – why else would my mom get so nervous? – and so if I even thought about it by accident, I was gonna have God to deal with.

Then, sex was something to be in awe of.

Junior high whispers. High school high-fives. I would listen to friends and friends of friends talk about it like it was Vegas and Heaven combined. Those who had it were admired. Those who didn’t were ignored. I so desperately wanted to know what all the giggling was about.

After that, sex was something to be good at.

Sharing stories, trading secrets, impressing my long-term boyfriend. It was a way to feel adult, to feel confident, to hook into society. It was my connection. To everything.

All to soon, it was a weapon.

A way to get back at the long-term boyfriend who ended our 4 years together with heartbreaking speed. A way to use men. A way to abuse myself. A way to forget how bad everything sucked, how lonely I was. I checked off conquests to ease my bruised ego, my sad self-esteem.

Later, sex was strange.

Hooking up as a true adult, with men 5, 10 years older, in my own apartment and with my own rules, and I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Was I proud? Was I ashamed of the number who had rushed in the door at midnight and stumbled out at 3 AM? Was this how the rest of society lived? …And, was God still watching? Did he even give a sh*t?

Now? Sex is whatever I make of it.

It’s scary. It’s awe-inspiring. It’s fun. It’s dangerous. It’s weird. Most importantly, it’s always evolving. People and society may attempt to put labels on those of us women who enjoy it, but no matter what they try, they’ll never be able to convince me my sexual thoughts are anyone’s business but my own.

Women’s sexuality tends to force us into boxes, into personalities or labels, but if we refuse to acknowledge those labels, there’s not a damn thing anyone can do about it. CollegeCandy’s Personal Sexual Revolution day is about busting open those labels with beautiful and funny honesty. There’s only one way to change the way people think about sex – and that’s with personal truth.

So please, join the discussion. Your voice deserves to be heard.