Sometimes I think we should just rename winter the season of love. When the cold weather comes in, it seems like couples just come out of the woodwork….or snowbanks. Suddenly they are holding hands in every store, making out on the sidewalks, and sharing kisses between sips of coffee at Starbucks.

Yes, it’s a little nauseating, but come on; everyone’s looking for a little love come holiday time.

But what makes a good love? A rugged jaw, some tight abs and some sparkling baby blues wouldn’t hurt, but when you get down to it, those are only an added bonus. The shiny gold bangle to your already perfect LBD. The truth is, there are way more important things every guy’s gotta have if he wants the honor of calling us his GF. And no, Pauly D, having a 25-minute daily hair regimen is not one of them.

So here are the 5 things we’re looking for when it comes to finding a boyf.

Makeout Skills:
Let’s be honest – no matter how much you love someone, no boyfriend can reach perfect status if there isn’t any chemistry, and chemistry simply can’t exist if the guy is sucking your nose off. Or licking your gums. Or drooling on your chin. A good boyfriend must have kissing mastered. And that means a variety, people. Sometimes we’re totally into a slow, romantic kiss, while other times we want to go at it like were in junior high and our parents could walk in any minute. Read More »

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Earlier this week I logged on to Facebook and my news feed was overwhelmed with updates on my friends joining the group “I’m single – and you’re going to have to be pretty amazing to change that!” While I normally dislike Facebook groups about random things, the title of this one hit home for me. First off, they used the right “you’re,” which is surprisingly rare on Facebook these days. Secondly, what an inspiring perspective to have on being single!

It is so easy for us single ladies to look at people in relationships and be a little jealous, or miss the stability and security that sometimes comes from being in a relationship. It is so easy to get trapped in the pattern of being in a relationship simply for the comfort that comes from having a boyfriend, any boyfriend. I know this from both personal experience and from watching so many of my friends get trapped in relationships where they are not satisfied but can’t bear to leave the security of their boyfriend behind.

Change is difficult, change is scary, and hell, I understand that better than anyone (I don’t even like changing the brand of mascara I use, let alone my relationship status!). But sometimes, as hard as it can seem at first, change is necessary. Read More »

[Got a Dude itch you just can’t scratch? Sick of getting the pity-eyes as you sift through the Self-Help section at your campus bookstore? Over wondering what those boys are thinking?  We got your back, girlfriend. Send your question over to askthedude@collegecandy.com. The Dude won’t sugarcoat it, beat around the bush, or any other weird cliche that means lie to you. Like a nice, juicy hot dog, he’ll be 100% real beef, 100% of the time.  So bring it on, ladies.]

Hi Dude,

So I met this guy at a party one night and we exchanged numbers. A few days later he texted me and asked me if I wanted to meet him for some drinks. I met him at the bar and we had a great time. We had so much to talk about, there was never an awkward silence and we ended up staying pretty late. I was going to take the bus home (I go to school in Chicago and the bar was far from my place), but he refused to let me and offered to drive me home, which was in the complete opposite direction of his home. I got really awkward when we pulled up so I sorta just said my goodbye and jumped out of the car. I didn’t want him to think that meant I wasn’t interested so I texted him the next day to thank him and tell him how good of a time I had.

And then…. Nothing.

WTF? It’s fine if he’s not interested (even though that makes no sense based on how well things went) but why would he drive me all the way home if he wasn’t into me? Is it because I didn’t kiss him goodnight?

– First Date Freak Read More »

Sarabeth here. But only for a short time, because I figured I could have my other half, Matt, write this week’s article. I thought it’d be a fun change of pace for those who ever wondered what things were like from his point of view. I already know how great and wonderful he is, but I think it’s important for other girls out there to see that there are really good guys to be had and when it comes to serious relationships, guys really aren’t that different from us.

Here’s what he had to say:

There are a couple of things going on in my life that I consider pretty surreal.  I’m nearing the end of my college career and going into the real world soon. I’m getting to the point in my life where I’m making fun of the trends of younger people, which makes me feel like the old man yelling at kids to get off my yard. All these freaking celebrities are dying! All of this stuff seems unreal; the fact that I’m getting married to the girl of my dreams is the polar opposite.

Sarabeth and I started out with a weird relationship. You might know the details if you’ve followed her from the beginning of her writing for CollegeCandy (which I also think is pretty surreal, BTW; random anonymous people arguing over what she says on them there internets is just weird). Basically, we were just friends first and as I spent more time with her, I came to the realization that I was (and still am!) truly happy when I was with her. Read More »

As you might have noticed last week, I am currently a little (read: a LOT) cynical towards the male species as a whole. But despite my extremely bitter outlook on men, I had a realization today that gave me some hope.

Alright, so every week, I volunteer at this after school program for inner city kids. And every week, I work with this grad student who gives me hope for men. Let’s call him Nick. I have the biggest crush on him. I want him even more than I want the spring line at J. Crew, which is saying something.

I’ve been working with Nick all year, and have had a stupid, schoolgirl crush on him since day one. He is so attractive (tall, a little stubble on his cheeks, a smile that takes over his whole face) that any girl would fall in love with him at first glance. But there are plenty of hot guys out there, and many of them also happen to be giant jerks. It’s Nick’s personality that sets him apart and makes me optimistic about my dating future.

Nick is really intelligent, super witty and has a great soul. The guy works with kids, for God’s sake, and he’s so good with them, too. Just last week he spent a half hour making a super hero mask for a second grader determined to develop an alter ego. I watched, my heart melting. Read More »

Sometimes I think we should just rename winter the season of love. When the cold weather comes in, it seems like couples just come out of the woodwork….or snowbanks. Suddenly they are holding hands in every store, making out on the sidewalks, and sharing kisses between sips of coffee at Starbucks.

Yes, it’s a little nauseating, but come on; everyone’s looking for a little love come holiday time.

But what makes a good love? A rugged jaw, some tight abs and some sparkling baby blues wouldn’t hurt, but when you get down to it, those are only an added bonus. The shiny gold bangle to your already perfect LBD. The truth is, there are way more important things every guy’s gotta have if he wants the honor of calling us his GF. And no, Pauly D, having a 25-minute daily hair regimen is not one of them.

So here are the 5 things we’re looking for when it comes to finding a boyf.

Makeout Skills:
Let’s be honest – no matter how much you love someone, no boyfriend can reach perfect status if there isn’t any chemistry, and chemistry simply can’t exist if the guy is sucking your nose off. Or licking your gums. Or drooling on your chin. A good boyfriend must have kissing mastered. And that means a variety, people. Sometimes we’re totally into a slow, romantic kiss, while other times we want to go at it like were in junior high and our parents could walk in any minute. Read More »

Fact: Women don’t understand men.
Fact: For the past 6 months, I’ve attempted to get some answers from some men to help all the ladies out there truly understand what the eff those turds are thinking.
Fact: After seeing a guy for two months and being “dumped” via email (where he called me the wrong name), I’m still horribly confused.

While our resident guy gave some pretty sound advice, there are so many tricky situations we women find ourselves in with men on a daily basis. Situations that can’t be summed up in some general question about dating or life or fake boobs.

So, I went on a quest to find a man who can be our voice of reason when we need him most. Like when our crush isn’t returning our calls, or, I don’t know, a guy says he loves us but wants to take the relationship back a few notches. WTF? Read More »

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If there’s one thing I’ve learned in the last four years, it’s this: Girls. Dig. A**holes.

Seriously. There are a lot of us who actually ENJOY meeting – and dating – this special breed of douche.

Okay. I might be EXTREMELY overgeneralizing here, but I have seen a wide range of chicks fall for guys who treat them like absolute sh*t. I’ve seen girls who stick with their sub-par lovers for years and can’t give you a straight answer as to why they put up with it.

I probably fall into this category as well; nice guys like me all the time, yet I constantly shy away from them in favor of their more dramatic/mysterious/douchebag-y counterparts.

This might be like flossing a dead horse – or watching a Tina Fey as Sarah Palin SNL skit (again, not that I’m complaining!), but seriously, why the hell do nice guys finish last? And whose fault is it, really?

A few of my theories : Read More »