DROOL.

Is LiLo getting a reality show?!

WTF is Rihanna wearing?

Good Morning America gives Adam Lambert the boot.

Well, this is one effed up family.

Paula Deen gets up close and personal with a pig.

Dancing With The Stars will be interesting this season.

So, Michael Jackson still hasn’t been buried. Ew?

Scrub that body!

I’ve never been more grateful to be a woman in America.

Why is Lily Allen crying?

Get the most out of those workouts.

This morning on Good Morning America, hypocrite Bristol Palin discussed her plan to push an “abstinence-only” message on teens. She couldn’t quite explain how abstinence got her where she is today (with, ahem, a child at age 18), but she was very confident that “abstinence is the only way you can effectively, 100%, prevent pregnancy.”

Props to B. Palin for that brilliant realization (and for basically admitting being a mom sucks), but since, as she said herself just weeks ago, “abstinence is unrealistic,” why don’t we figure out a more-um-successful way to stay child-free, while still satisfying our libidos.

Enter: Birth Control!!

Crazy, right? This stuff comes in all sorts of forms: patches, IUDs, condoms, looking at teen mothers trying to care for their kids and realizing how much less fun life would be with a child… Oh, and the pill, which, when taken correctly (not a difficult feat to accomplish if you can swallow a pill), is 99.9% effective. Certainly more effective than preaching abstinence…and then having unprotected sex with your hockey playing boyfriend in the middle of the Alaskan wilderness. And most of the pills now come in pretty packaging! (Yaz has a tidy blue suede case with fun stickers that help you stay on track and turn birth control into a fun craft project).

Of course, we all (should) know that hormonal contraception doesn’t prevent against narsty STDs, so, unless you and your sex-bud have been tested and are exclusively hookin’ up, please use condoms too! I can tell you from looking at some pretty graphic books that Syphilis ain’t pretty. Neither is abandoning your education to raise a child on welfare and food stamps. So instead of shooting moose, go get yourself some nooky. Because, like Ms. Bristol once said, not getting any is just “unrealistic.”

Just remember to pop that very important pill first.

[I like to think of myself as a pretty easy going gal and try not to sweat the small stuff. But sometimes (ok, maybe slightly more often) the general cluelessness, carelessness and overall stupidity of some things and or/people really gets to me. I find that venting is the most efficient way to rid myself of the stress that idiots, wrong meal orders, lack of cell phone etiquette and cheese flavored products (that don’t even contain any freaking cheese!) induce.

So, in an attempt to avoid an ulcer or an unfortunate road rage incident, I vent to you, dear reader. Please feel free to join in and comment about anything–really, anything–that pissed. you. off. this week. Let it all hang out. I feel you.]

Long Lost Friends: You know the best friend who truly defined the term BFF for you? Well you can scribble out that last F now that you two have drifted apart. You never thought you’d see the day when it had been 2 years since your last sleepover/margarita marathon/ trip to Forever 21 together, but that day has sadly arrived.

You catch yourself reminiscing over long forgotten Facebook albums; some of the pictures are even—gasp—detagged! You find yourself determined to reunite and catch up, what with you both returning home from different schools on Spring Break. What a coincidence, you’re not going to Mexico, and she won’t be joining the Senor Frog with all of her schoolmates. With nothing else to do in the boring suburbs, you assume that you two will def hang out (mostly because you texted her “we will def hang out”). But sure enough, you and homegirl don’t get together. You don’t even hang out. Not even a Starbucks run together…and the worst part is? She lives a block away from you. Read More »

Kim Kardashian a UN Ambassador!?

Divorce rates aren’t as high as we all thought. Hooray!

I think this might be the hottest gift of the season.

Britney’s GMA performance was big.

Pop culture phenomena we hope don’t return in ‘09.

8 tips for frugal fitness.

Lindsay Lohan loves blogging (and is more than welcome to joing the CollegeCandy team! Linds, call us!)

Someone’s stalking Kirsten Dunst.

Penn State students love two things: football and sex.

The best tips for acing finals.

Beautify yourself and support the AIDS cause at the same time.

[Read Day 2 HERE]

This morning I tried to watch Good Morning America while I got ready for work, but no such luck whe it came to my diet restrictions. The first commercial break assaulted me with a Hershey’s Kiss commercial displaying a cute couple within the first millisecond and sent me sprinting for the TV to turn it off.

But on an exciting note, (and yes, I realize the following is really not that exciting to a normal person) I stumbled across a Miles Davis CD, and more lucky for me Miles is a man of few words — or rather no words, in his music anyway, so I have safely extend my musical selection to another six songs. Yes.

But here I am in day three of my love-free week, and I am wondering if upon my entrance back into that world with rom-coms, love songs (well, any songs with words really…) sitcoms and their amusing and enviable relationships, along with happily ever after endings will send me into a romantic overload? Here’s to hoping it won’t (obviously you can’t see my raised wine glass, but it’s there. Believe me). Read More »

You know, I can understand being an angst ridden teenager. I can also understand being angry with someone who might have been provoking me on a social networking site-like Myspace. On top of that, I can understand being jealous of all of the totally rad videos on YouTube that get tons of plays and I can relate to the desire to create something that becomes incredibly popular.

BUT, beating the sh*t out of a cheerleader in your class who MIGHT have been (nothing has been proven) provoking you on Myspace is NOT COOL.

Eight teenage girls in Florida recently did something so disgusting that even angry outcasts would have cringe. They lured Victoria Lindsey, a pretty cheerleader, back to one of their homes. They had a video camera set up and then they proceeded to beat her for 35 minutes. They beat her so terribly that she was knocked unconscious and then dragged off into a car. Once in the car, she was driven to a second location and told that if she ran to the police… she would receive an even worse beating. Read More »

Kelly. What. Are. You. Wearing?!

Girl, you’re full figured. I love it. It’s refreshing. It’s your body, be healthy and happy. But please keep in mind…certain outfits don’t look good on everyone.

I’ll give you an example. Guess what I can’t wear? Grey leggings. They look horrible on me. It’s like two sausages are connected to my torso. Plus, I sweat right through grey cotton. It’s a nightmare. I don’t wear nightmares. So grey leggings aren’t part of my wardrobe.

Tight, tight, tight black pants and some kind of weird, Indian/biker belt should be your no no outfit, Ms. K. There’s no need to dress like every other skinified starlet out there. There are ways for curvy girls to make their bodies look good. Let the untalented bimbos wear scary Indian/biker belts. Cover yourself in something flattering. Prove to America that beautiful comes in all shapes and sizes.

Let’s make a deal, K.C. Right here, right now. I’ll resist buying that jumper I’ve been eyeing that will only look good on a 6 foot tall model, and you stand firmly against pants that squeeze your thighs like water balloons.

Great. Glad we could have this talk.

What do you think about KC’s new look?