Wanna know what happened on this week’s creation of Gossip Girl?  Why don’t you look up the word ‘lamesauce’ in the dictionary and get back at me.  Didn’t find anything?  Well, it’s time to petition Merriam-Webster, because that’s the only word I can think of to describe the disappointment I feel for this show on a weekly basis.  A girl can only be distracted with lace blazers and Nate smirks for so long before she totally gives up.

Basically, I need a wicked twist this season, and I need it now.

The best twist about this episode?  Nate is back to his old self.  He’s smokin’ the reefer and shakin’ his booty to Tik Tok.  Did I just say reefer?  What am I, forty?  Based upon the fact I age ten years per episode why yes, yes I am. (But I don’t care how old I am; I still want Nate to babysit me. He likes cougars, right?)

It pains me greatly that the closest thing to excitement in this episode was some sweet, rolled Mary Jane and the sparkles on Serena’s birthday skirt. (Note: not her birthday SUIT. I don’t think Serena would be one to vagazzle…though that would have upped the excitement a bit). I mean, I could go to a campus frat party and find that; I turn to Gossip Girl for the thrilling drama, for god’s sake. Thrilling drama that has been MIA since season 3. Therefore, it’s time to take action.  It’s time to really reach out to anyone out there that is willing listen and even the ones that are not.  So I’m going to do what I do second best: write an open letter. (First best goes to Wine Pong. No one can stop me once that Franzia hits my system!) Read More »

I want Serena’s boobs.  Ok, now that we have that out of the way….

Burrr. It’s cold in the Midwest and the frostbite that was last night’s episode of Gossip Girl isn’t making it any better. GG is turning into the LAX airport; I hate going there, but the celebrity fashion is great. I really think the CW network has the ability to turn any show into the most depressing thing I’ve ever seen.  I mean look at One Tree Hill.  GG has turned into such a downer, it’s no wonder they air it on Mondays. Just the cherry on my I-Hate-Monday cream pie.

Since GG is sucking it up lately (see last week’s suck-fest here), how is one supposed to keep the Upper East Side hot? Chuck keeps warm the old fashioned way (under the covers…with a slut bag!), Eric seeks the comfort of loved ones (even if they’re drug dealers), and others try to keep away the gloom by keeping things bright. Like me!

This week, it’s time we look on the bright side of the Upper East Side. You know, see the glass (of $1,000 champagne) half-full. Find the silver (or platinum?) lining. Stop and smell the roses (and Chanel No. 5). Or any other cliche that means “try to find something good going on in this stupid show so I can bring myself to keep watching it every week.” Read More »

I’ve been afraid of patterned tights since Gossip Girl made them such a trend. They look a tad bit tricky to pull off, which so makes me want to be the one who can pull them off perfectly.  Now that it’s just chilly enough that bare legs are gawked at but a winter coat is on hold until someone gets if for you for Christmas (hey mom!), tights are an affordable accessory that can keep your gams both warm and fashionable.

Enter the Gams Games Tights form Anthropologie. A very detailed floral pattern makes the flowers in the thigh area look like they were meant to be that large, not like they’re stretched out by the unfortunate truth that thighs are bigger than calves (especially after a few too many late-night pizza binges). The detail is also so becoming and shadowy enough that you won’t look like you wallpapered your legs, an unfortunate byproduct of some other floral tights.

There aren’t a lot of pieces out there that you can wear on any given occasion that can be considered wearable art – unless you’re Lady Gaga. These not only look like an artist sketched them onto your legs with the grey colors and shading details, but they’re the simplest way to add a wow factor to a plain, tailored dress or a tired plain skirt. Read More »

I’m almost positive that I am not the only woman who wants to accent my assets and disguise my least favorite attributes. There’s no point in buying clothes that don’t make you feel fantastic – they should show what you want to show while smoothing out any imperfections (hint hint – last week’s waist belt).  Whether you’ve indulged in a few too many late-night dorm binges or you’ve been studying too hard to make it to the gym, this amazing Curvey Keyhole Tee from Body Central will remind you that you’re cute and sexy no matter how many pizza boxes you have piled up near your door.

Inspired by Monday night’s Gossip Girl and the so-sexy-it-was-almost-vulgar keyhole shirt that Serena wore (and in front of her mother!) to the Observer party, the idea had me thinking. She wore a fitted black shirt with a diamond shape cut out right in the center of her chest. The girls had to have been duct taped to her sides to keep them from falling out. But her shirt, while unrealistic in the real world (come on, no one’s boobs could look like that!) has the same principles of this Body Central shirt: it drew your eye directly to the most flattering part of her body and nowhere else. The idea was enough to make me want to rush to my wardrobe with a pair of scissors.

After I forced myself to put scissors down, I found this much more innocent version on Body Central, the curators of cheap, well made, just-sexy-enough tops that you can’t go wrong with.  We all know the basics of how to show a little skin – a v-kneck for the chest, spaghetti straps for the shoulders, basically anything besides low rise jeans to highlight a muffin top. But keyhole cut outs? They’re a whole new concept in something unexpected.  Read More »

So, I don’t know about you, but during last week’s GG, my attention moved very quickly from the Little-J-Is-Taking-Down-The-Mean-Girls drama to the clutch with the skull print that she was sporting. And I fell instantly in love.

Let’s be honest: besides the drama, the gorgeous handbags are the most exciting thing on the show.

I know that most of the girls on the show don clothes and accessories way out of my price range, but I just had to know about this bag, whatever it would cost me. And after some intense Googling, I found it! Read More »