[Everyone's got a morning-after story and we wanna hear yours! Send it over to us and we'll post it - anonymously, of course - right here!]

I love grandmas.  Most of the time they are cute, harmless, and give you cards on your birthday with a five-dollar bill stuffed inside (which is promptly spent at Happy Hour).  They cook you meatballs, pass down ugly sweaters (that earn you the best-dressed title at the annual Ugly Sweater Party), and say the nicest things when you are convinced life is in WWIII with you.  So, yes, it has been fairly established that Grandmas are the bomb.com.  But as wonderful as they are and as much as you just wanna pinch their wrinkley little cheeks every time you see them, there is a time and a place for grandmas.

And that is not standing over my bed in the morning, after a night of doing Jell-O shots.

Let me explain: Read More »

Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, and saddest things he hears on his college campus. And we know he’s not the only one who hears this stuff. Join the Overheard revolution! Leave your own overheard convos in the comments or send ‘em over!

(Guy, at a dining hall’s table, eating dinner.)

Guy: Isn’t what we call cauliflower just effeminate broccoli?

(Guys in a public library.)

Guy: So I was reading The Babysitter’s Club, and I guess Grandma had a really cool secret. But chapter books are too much for me these days, so I just flipped to the back to find out what it was. Turns out Grandma just had breast cancer.

(Guy, walking on the beach.)

Guy: I’m Tin Pin Bill. See, they used to call me  Crim Pin Bill, but that didn’t really make any sense. Read More »

[I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not the epitome of prim and proper- heck, who really is nowadays? But looking around at the misguided youths of today *ahem drinking buddies*, I’m starting to think that Miss Manners might have been onto something.

While you may never need to know how to greet a duke or how to tell which fork is REALLY the oyster fork, knowing how to deal with people whom owe you money, how much to tip, and how to address the ever annoying licorice-in-teeth conundrum without being rude might actually come in handy in the real world. I'm not trying to be your mother - oh goodness, no - I'm just here to help you out of those little etiquette dilemmas. So here goes: a quick lesson in etiquette. The sh*t you might actually need to know.]

This past weekend, my bf invited me to have Easter dinner with his family. After already weaseling my way out of both Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner, I knew I was going to have to come up with a GOOD excuse this time. Unfortunately, he caught me off guard and I think I stammered something along the lines of “Er… can’t…. brother… stay home… babysit… sorry!” into the phone. His response? “Great! Bring him with you.” Crap. So in honor of my 2 hours of awkwardness (kidding!!! uh..sorta), here is how to manage: Read More »

[Every week, CC and John bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution!

Leave your own overheard convos in the comments.]

“I got straight A’s this semester. Well, and I gotta pee.”

“What?”

“I gotta pee. You gotta pee too.”

“All I want for Christmas is a boy on top of me.”

“Grandma, you need to know this stuff! Otherwise you’ll get roofied!”

“Well, it sounds exciting! I’d rather get roofied than… I don’t know, doofied.”

“This is a cute naked girl. She looks like you.”

“Yeah, Mom, isn’t it a nice Christmas card?”

“Didn’t your friends send you naked girls for your birthday, too?”

“… Yeah.”

“Honey, are you bisexual?”

“Mom!”

“How about that sultry duet with the dark-voiced date rapist trying to convince his sloshed female companion to stay in because it’s cold outside?”

“You mean ‘Let It Snow’?” Read More »

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The worst part of Thanksgiving is the dogs. Everyone has that one relative with a German shepherd, two Corgis and a Schnoodle/Pug mix. Some of us have more than one of these relatives, and some of us have many, many more than one. Some of these relatives have named their dogs Bill O’Reilly. All of these relatives arrive at every holiday party.

But you can’t just tell someone that you don’t like their dogs. There is no greater insult around the Thanksgiving table; you may as well have stuffed, dressed and roasted nephew Kenny.

Political beliefs work the same way, and in some ways are more annoying, because there’s no practical limit to how many you can stuff into the same party, and they’re usually invisible, unless Uncle Joe’s got some kind of witty hat (“Republicans Screw The Country, Democrats Usually Raise Taxes”). Read More »

With Thanksgiving only a few weeks away, ‘tis the season for awesome TV, beautiful foliage, great hair days and—of course—seasonal gourds.

What better way is there to celebrate than with a delicious, Grandma-worthy pumpkin pie? This one looks, tastes and smells like the real thing and you’ll get it done (and impress your friends and family) in 5 steps:

You Will Need:

1 frozen 9″ pie crust

1 can of Pumpkin (not pumpkin pie filler!)

1 can of sweetened condensed milk

2 eggs

1 and a half teaspoons of cinnamon

1/2 tsp. salt

3/4 tsp. of ginger

3/4 tsp. of nutmeg Read More »

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

The Awkward Call:

You wake up to the sunlight shining into your eyes. You open them and – whoa – the killer hangover sets in. Headache, nausea and a mouth filled with cotton. And then you roll over to find a man lying next to you.

And the entire evening comes flooding back: the drinks, the sloppy make out sesh in the kitchen of the bar, the striptease in the cab.

You lift the covers; yup, completely naked. Your bedmate stirs, opens his eyes and smiles at you. “Phew,” you think to yourself. “He’s pretty cute.” You begin the usual morning-after conversation – hangovers, “what the hell did I drink last night”s, and other niceties – before he starts rubbing your back.

You know where this is leading, but before things start heading there you need to brush that so-drunk-I-smoked- a-cigarette taste out of your mouth.

And then the phone rings. Your rifle through the pile of jeans and underwear on the floor and flip it open before you realize who it is: your grandma. Read More »

When I was a little girl, I used to hear story after story about my grandma’s apple cake. Not apple pie, mind you–my grandma was from the Bronx, not frickin Kansas–but apple cake. Everyone was always carrying on about how delicious and how light it was, and my grandma would smile and throw her hands in the air and say, “Someday, maybe I’ll make it again.”

Well, she didn’t. I never got to taste this mythical culinary delight. However, I often wondered if my grandma, who was a bright and feisty little thing, if she was tricking them into remembering it more fondly than they would have if she’d kept making it.

I’ve never been able to track down my grandma’s recipe, but I was able to find something comparable–and I gotta tell you, for cake, it’s amazingly low-fat. It’s also amazingly delicious.

So, have at ye, apple cake lovers! Make my grandma proud! (Eat, eat, you’re all skin and bones!)

Not Quite My Grandma’s Apple Cake

(serves 10)

Stuff That Goes In It

2 1/2 cups of chopped, cored apples

2/3 cups of packed brown sugar

1 cup of flour

1 cup of whole wheat flour Read More »

Flickr is a crazy little website. Pictures from all over the world, from crappy and boring “here’s me on the lawn, now here’s me laughing on the lawn” photos to beautiful, artist renderings of pristine landscapes — everything is contained, and easy to find, on this user friendly website.

Why, Flickr is so simple and easy even your grandma could do it!

And someone’s grandma certaily has.

I really can’t say how our office stumbled across this set of photos, but I can say that after searching through about 100 of them, I have never wished there was eye sanitizer more than at this exact moment. I mean…what.the.hell.IS.this?! Read More »

Grandmas. It’s hard to figure out what they want for their birthdays. Do they want slippers? Humidifiers? Canes? Or maybe, actually, they want something a little racier.

Whether she wanted it or not, this Grandma got something rather unusual for her b-day.