Happy Groundhog Day, guys! Today Punxsutawney Phil came out of hibernation to see if he could find his shadow, only to scurry back inside his hole.  Meanwhile us human folk are left to discuss his weather prediction. The tradition states that if the li’l dude sees his shadow, which he did this year, we get a whole six more weeks of winter. Joy! Though this winter has been unseasonably warm where I live in Chicago (and by that, I mean it’s been in the 40s), it still gets pretty chilly. Honestly, I could do without the season of winter all together (minus snow at Christmastime).

There are definitely a lot of things that I would be willing to do in the place of six more weeks of winter. I would give up my Diet Coke addiction. I would wear a bra 24/7 instead of taking it off the minute I walk into my home. I would even start flossing the amount of times that my dentist recommends. Here are five more things that I would take in place of the cold, blistering winds and snowstorms that a Chicago winter typically offers. What would you do if winter would disappear and spring sprang early?

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Katie is finishing up her undergrad at North Central College in Naperville, Illinois. She enjoys wasting hours on Facebook and tweeting things no one cares about. When asked the question, “Do you do marathons?” She promptly responds, “Of course! Which show?” Follow her @KatieGarrity!

So normally, I try to keep the Weekly Ten a positive place. Best kisses. Best boys. Best ways to spend your winter break. But this week, well, that’s just not happening.

I’m not sure if it’s the bad weather or the senioritis or my inability to focus on any one task for more than five minutes at a time, but I’ve been in quite the mood these past few days. And I’m taking my anger out on February, this too short, unproductive, cold, depressing, and generally annoying month.

So here’s why I am officially hating on February.

10. Groundhog Day is a bogus holiday. Yes, okay. So it’s cute to watch a little groundhog crawl out of a whole and get scared by its own shadow. But is this holiday ever actually accurate? I mean, I’m crossing my frozen fingers that this year it will be; there’s nothing I’d love more this year than an early spring….especially after Snowmaggedon 2011.

9. One month closer to midterms. What comes after February? March.  The month of midterms. The month of study sessions and papers and cramming and procrastinating.  The two week long process of trying to relearn everything you’ve already forgotten. February is cruel even as it leaves us.

8. That whole leap year thing. 28 days? 29 days? Make up your mind already! I don’t have time to deal with your identity crisis, February!

7. At the end of this month, my thesis is due.  Like due, due. It has to be done. Finished. Never to be touched by my hands again. And I’m nowhere near ready for that to happen. So for me, February is going to be thesis month, which you know, just completely sucks.

6. Valentine’s Day is horrible. For single girls, married girls, engaged girls and girls in relationships. For the couples of the world Valentine’s Day is an enormous amount of pressure. Do you do the big dinner? The night in? Do you ignore the holiday all together and hope it passes without incident? That’s probably what most single girls are going to do, because for them Valentine’s Day is just the greeting card company’s way of  saying “Sorry you don’t have anyone to buy you chocolate….so spend the next 72 hours gorging on the stuff while watching Lifetime movies and wallowing in your misery.”

5. The Wardrobe sucks. All of the stores are releasing their new spring lines. Floral dresses. Jean skirts. Espadrilles. Wedges. So many cute outfit ideas. But can we wear those outfits? Nope. We’re stuck in baggy coats and layer upon layer of clothing, rain boots and snow boats and hats and scarves that are already standing on their last leg. It was cute once upon a time, way back in December when the winter weather was just beginning, but now I’m sick of it.

4. New Year’s resolutions start to fall apart. They were going strong in January. You were hitting the gym regularly, writing down all your assignments, and totally embracing that whole new year, new you thing. But then February comes along. It’s cold. It’s depressing and it’s overwhelming. Suddenly you have more important things to focus on than your plans to never eat fried food again….like your plans to drink beer and mozzarella sticks, wings and french fries at the Super Bowl party.

3. It’s depressing. You’re upset that you can’t keep your new year’s resolutions. There are no holidays to look forward to. It’s too cold to even consider going out. So all you do is sit home watching reality TV marathons and eating your weight in cookie dough. Which you know, could be fun every once in a while but not for an entire month. And not because you have nothing better to do. February cramps my style. And that’s depressing.

2. It’s winter break month for high schools. Remember in high school, when you used to have a whole week off for President’s Day instead of just the Monday? That was so much fun, wasn’t it? No holidays to take part in. No familial obligations. Just a week home to relax and catch up on some sleep. Yeah, well now we’re in college so we don’t get that anymore. At least, not until March.

1. It’s too cold. It’s icy. It’s raining. It’s freezing. It’s slushy. And I can’t take it anymore. Since January the  temperatures have already dipped below freezing more times than I care to recall. And February will not see the end of this. No, it will see the continuation of this. A very long, very unnecessary continuation that forces me to wear puffer coats and unattractive scarfs and lined rain boots in an attempt to stay warm and dry. And I hate it.

I hate it all.
Is February over yet?

[Check out Jenn's other musings-in-the-form-of-a-list here.]

You know, Groundhog Day. The movie. You’re with me? Right. Well in Groundhog Day Murray gets to relive the same day over and over again, Groundhog Day, which wasn’t so great for him because he kept messing everything up. But still, we’re a little bit jealous. There are plenty of days in college we’d love to live over and over and over again, and never change a thing. (Editor’s Note: Or the whole thing? Please?)

Here are our top 5:

1. Your 21st Birthday. This is it. The day you’ve been waiting for. The day you take your first legal drink. The day that’s all about you. An excuse to splurge on a fabulous new, totally 21 outfit. Silly hats. Sashes. Maybe even a tiara to go with that sparkly dress? Free shots. Lots and lots of liquor. And the perfect excuse to go up to a boy and ask him if he’ll buy you a drink. The perfect excuse to do whatever you want, whenever you want to. Because nothing is a better excuse for drunken bar top dancing than “It’s my 21st birthday!” It should be noted though, powers that be, that we want to relive our 21^st birthdays, not the morning after hangovers.

2. Your First Freshman Year Brunch Recap. The first few weeks of college have been hard. You don’t really have a group of friends yet, you’ve thrown up in the bathroom twice from drinking Bartons, and you failed your first college test. And then one Sunday afternoon, you don’t remember the exact date, you ended up sitting in the dining hall for hours cracking up about last night, telling jokes, saying things like “and then I fould Liz making out with her T.A in the bathroom.” And as you eat your third helping of waffles with whipped cream (yay for dining hall health!), you realize that you finally have friends that you really like and you fit in and you love college and there’s no place you would rather be right now.

3. Homecoming. Senior Year. Homecoming is a big deal. And I’m not exactly sure why. It’s not about the game. And it’s not about the tailgating. It’s about the entire process. It’s an experience only college students will ever really understand, and its different every year. But if you have to pick one homecoming to relive over and over again, it should be the your senior year homecoming. You’ve done this enough times by now that you have your routine down perfectly, but yet you’re nostalgic enough to truly appreciate the experience. In fact, you’ll probably even manage to catch a little bit of the game that year. (Sidenote: This probably only applies if your team wins. Because the team that loses probably isn’t going to want to relive that game everyday.)

4. Classes Canceled for the First Time. Maybe it was a snow day. Or a professional holiday you forgot you had off. Or maybe your professor just unexpectedly canceled class without warning. Whatever the reason it’s still an awesome feeling, hearing your alarm go off, waking up, expecting to spend a day listening to lectures as you try not to fall asleep, only to find an e-mail informing you that your classes have been canceled. Maybe you roll back over and spend the day half sleeping, half catching up on your favorite television shows as you lounge in your pajamas and order take-out. Maybe you and your friends build a snowman. Maybe your organize your entire room or head to the beach with your friends. What you do doesn’t matter, it’s just the fact that you got to do it that feels so great.

5. Your “only at my school” day. Whether it’s Hash Bash or Winter Carnival or Mayfest or whatever your schools does, it’s the best day of year. EVERYONE you’ve ever met in college is hanging around together, drinking, smoking, laughing, talking, bringing up old memories, making you mimosas, serving free hot dogs, doing kegs and eggs, and best of all, handing out t-shirts. You don’t have a worry in the world (besides Where are my shoes?) and you’re absolutely convinced that you go to the most fun school in the entire world.

Which days would you want to relive?

As cute as he may be (just look at that face!), we’re pretty much loathing Phil right now. Lucky for that little guy, it’s too cold outside for us to load on the layers and head to Punxsatuwney to hunt him down (JK, PETA!). And if we were willing to stick our icy cold feet into a pair of still-wet-from-yesterday Uggs, there are a few other people we’d be going after first:

1. ABC: While the rest of the world is hating on NBC for the whole Conan debacle, I have a major bone to pick with the ABC suits. Canceling Ugly Betty? What the hell? That show has the humor of Glee, the high fashion of Gossip Girl and the drama of The Bachelor. Maybe if you didn’t change its airtime so much more people would know when to watch it and tune in!

2. Gisele Bundchen: The Victoria’s Secret Angel looks like this after having a baby in December (clearly this is a pattern with them, given the post-baby bodies of Heidi Klum and Adriana Lima). She also reports that she didn’t have to wear maternity clothes during the pregnancy. If that’s not enough to make you hate her, don’t forget that her husband and baby daddy is NFL hottie, Tom Brady. GAH!

3. The Situation: First of all, why was he at the Grammy’s? Second of all, Mike “the Situation” Sorrentino is reportedly in the works to give motivational speeches at his New Jersey high school.  They’re gonna let HIM give advice to young, impressionable high school students!?!? I’m alarmed.  The Sitch joked that “I’d probably say to them, make sure you keep doing your sit ups,” but to be honest, how to get a sexually transmitted disease 6-pack is the ONLY advice I’d trust him to give those youngn’s.

4. Amanda Seyfried: The former Mean Girl is starring with Channing Tatum (swoon) in Dear John, which comes out this Friday.  Not only does she have silky blonde hair, big green eyes and flawless skin, but she gets to kiss, hug, and generally be all over her delicious co-star.  Jealousy and hate ensue.

5. Taylor Swift: Okay, so I might be beating a dead horse here, but I just don’t get the whole Taylor obsession.  Why does this girl win EVERYTHING!? I know, I know – she’s cute, smart and writes her own music, and I’m not trying to take that away from her.  But in my opinion, Lady Gaga has more creative talent in her pinky finger than Taylor does in her whole (5’11) body, not to mention that The Fame had four number one singles, more than any debut album in history.  I worship Gaga, Dave’s Big Whiskey has been looping in my car CD player for the past 6 months, I have a serious girl-crush on Beyonce, and the Black Eyed Peas basically owned the charts with their singles this year, so hate me if you want, but I’d rather spend another 12 months trudging through snow than see this girl take home another award.

Leave your own overheard convos in the comments.]

“It’s late. It’s dangerously late. I’d better set my clock for omelettes.”

“Oh my God! The Japanese Dragon! It… it escaped from the Chinese New Year’s Parade!”

“When will you be there?”

“Why do you care?”

“So I can hang out with you – my friend. Because I’ve got friends. Unlike you.”

“That kitten’s got a beard. He doesn’t see anything wrong with it. He thinks it’s just dandy, that poor little guy.”

You can’t be too hung over. You need to wake up and have no motivation. When having no motivation is actively painful, then you got a problem.

The best way to experience Groundhog Day is via video – you know, you really get that one crowning moment of groundhog perfection.

“If you pull a rodent out of a hole really fast, what do you expect it to do? It sh*ts all over the place.”

Two young men, walking in silence. Then:

“You’re the best friend I’ve met at college, man.”

“Yeah. You are too.”

A class, outside, under a tree

“This isn’t a circle of friendship. This is a circle of hate. I hate you all.”

“T and K. We call each other T and K.”

“Like Tits and C**k.”

“Hardness fetishists?”

“No, no – armpit faces.”

“I’m not usually this cool. These are my boyfriend’s pants.”

“Oops. I ran that red light. Gift of the Magi.”

“You can’t just say ‘Gift of the Magi’ every time you f**k something up!”

“Fruit Loops Marshmallow Bar? How is that?”

“I don’t know. It’s strange. You should eat it if you want to be interested in your food.”

But for the single girls (like me) Valentine’s Day is another freaking reminder that, guess what? You’re still single. So in order to keep yourself from crying at the fact that you’ll be spending next weekend stuffing your face with all things chocolate, it is essential that you keep yourself laughing. And this week was full of things to make you laugh.

Some of these funnies we can attribute to celebs. Take Michael Phelps, for example. Maybe it’s just me, but there is something funny about our little golden boy getting caught smokin’ da reefer. Also, Chirstian Bale’s freak out is absolutely hysterical. And weathermen may not be anything but local celebrities, but they have the funniest bloopers. Even though we may only be celebs in our own world, we sure are funny!

And if that reminder that we have another 6 fabulous weeks of winter makes you a little more depressed, remember there are worse things. Like looking like this, and thinking it looks good. Picture her wearing this shirt…THAT would be funny!

On a more serious note, February is also National Eating Disorder Awareness Month. So ladies, take care of yourself and love yourself. Educate yourselves about eating disorders so that you can learn how to help those around you.

Happy February!

So the damn groundhog saw his damn shadow, which means we are in for 6 more glorious weeks of winter. Splendid. WTF, Phil? Why do you hate us so much.

Upon hearing the news we wanted to head to Phil’s hometown and beat the crap out of him (so. sick. of sweaters.), but our therapist (Oprah) always talks about focusing on positive things. So we will.

Instead of hating on Phil – because, afterall, it’s not his fault – we thought we’d make a list of the 5 things and people we currently hate more than Punxatawny Phil. Yay us! We’re so positive!

1. Our alarm clocks – They mean well, but 9am? Really? Don’t you know we were up late watching a hilarious episode of The Office?

2. Comcast – Granted that quick peepee flash to Arizona fans during the Superbowl was disturbingly hysterical, but there were kids watching. And old people. And who does that with their….well, just watch.

3. Mexican food – But only because it was so good last night and so, so, SO bad today.

4. The media calling Jessica Simpson fat - If she’s fat then we’re going on The Biggest Loser.

5. The movie Groundhog Day. It is just bad.

What a moron. He totally should have denied, denied, denied.

Maybe he’ll be first in line for the Denny’s Free Grand Slam breakfast.

The Super Bowl’s best and worst commercials. What do you think?

Jennifer Hudson rocked the house.

Is it just me, or is Bruce Springsteen a total hottie?

 Life lessons you can take from TV.

What does Elisabeth Hasselbeck have against Wii Fit?

Tips for staying in an Ivy League. Apparently it’s not that hard.

Dammit, Phil - we can’t handle 6 more weeks of winter.