Recently, during a rather absurd evening involving a really sh*tty club and free bottles of Grey Goose, I found that I had somehow misplaced my cellular phone.

For the next two weeks while battling with my insurance company about their obligation to pay for a new one, I was completely phoneless. And surprisingly, I found that while not being able to call my roommate or receive text messages from my BFF was disheartening, the most annoying thing about not having a phone was that I never knew what f*cking time it was. During my time of mandatory cell abstinence, I commented on this fact to my mother. Her response was thought-provoking.

“Why don’t you get a watch?”

A watch? The last time I had a watch, I was in sixth grade. It was a gift from my parents for my twelfth birthday and on the face was an image of Elmo whose arms ticked away the minutes. At the time, I thought it was the sh*t and all my ladyfriends agreed, but when the leather straps crumbled the following summer I was pretty well over it and I’ve never felt the need to get a new one, Elmo-themed or otherwise.

Which leads me to ask the question, are watches obsolete? In this age when everyone has a phone that they have on their person more or less at all times, is there really a need for watches? The only people I can think of who do have watches are people like my mom and grandma who grew up in the Dark Ages before Verizon existed, and even they have the option of telling time with their phones. It would seem that their insistence on wearing watches stems from a deep-seated habit of looking at their wrist when someone asks the time as opposed to rooting in their pockets. Read More »

Living in New York City, I’m the kind of girl who needs to carry my life around with me in one huge bag. I’m like Mary Poppins, if you need it I have it!

So if there’s one thing I know it’s come Fall weather, it’s super important to be prepared. This means a good (preferably long) sweater, a cute hat, an umbrella…and a pair of galoshes!

If you make like a Boy Scout you’ll never find yourself to be uncomfortable. Taking off layers is way better than shivering on the street corner, cursing your wet feet.

But here’s a question: why are people still buying designer rainboots? They are a huge waste of money, no matter how important you think being trendy is. It’s much easier (and easier on your wallet) to go to the shoe store–Payless works–and pick up a pair for $20.

A smarter fall splurge? A raincoat!

Picking the perfect jacket for the fall is way more important than picking out what goes on your feet…a coat is practically your outfit when the weather turns gray.

Why not buy something to last? Check out Burberry or Gucci or you just have to go the designer route, if not there are other more…eccentric jackets that will make you stand out from the masses this fall. Read More »

Tom Ford, the wunderkind designer who saved Gucci from going bankrupt way back when, is credited as being one of the most influential fashion gods of the last decade. He’s done a lot of things, including becoming creative director of Yves Saint Laurent a few years ago, and being named best International Designer at the first VH1/Vogue Awards in New York in 2000.

He claims to sleep about 3 hours a night, is quoted as saying things like, “The YSL (Yves Saint Laurent) woman might tie her boyfriend up and drip hot wax on him before they have sex, for instance. The Gucci woman is just going to have sex”, and originally went to school to be an actor.

Oh yeah, he also sells perfume by photographing it in between a naked woman’s thighs. Read More »

Alright, so…..first was the return of the fanny pack. So unfortunate.But now, it’s SHOULDER PADS???

I thought these pointed, puffy creatures were dead for good. Guess not, cause runways everywhere are showing them, i.e. Style.com’s slide show revealing Shoulder Pad Fashion from top designers such as Dior and Gucci. Come on guys, really?

Ugh. My mom used to make me wear blazers with shoulder pads sewn into them when I was, like, eight, and I’d rip those suckers out ASAP. Read More »

Either TMZ is telling a boldface lie, or Britney Spears has finally become 100% certifiably crazy.

The tacky tabloid is reporting that Ms. Insane’s photo shoot and interview with OK! Magazine went so badly that the publishers are deciding whether “to report what actually happened—or sanitize the truth to protect the pop train wreck.”

Apparently, the mother of two was acting strange throughout the entire interview, and escaped “to the bathroom” a number of times, coming back from each trip a little more whacked out than before. Read More »

Oh Anderson Cooper.

Your salt and pepper hair, perfectly dressed swimmer’s physique, amazing shoes…and, oh yes, your skills as a CNN reporter. Your delicate beauty not only tantalizers bored homemakers while they make dinner, but gay men all over the planet.

Why you won’t admit to being one of those beautiful men who like men, I’ll never know. Maybe you’re afraid CNN won’t like it, maybe you’re afraid you’ll lose your female viewers, maybe your agent made you sign a contract in your blood that states I will never admit to being gay as long as I’m a TV icon. So help me god. Read More »