With all the fuss lately surrounding healthy body images and the perfect abs, it seems a bit surprising that Donna Simpson, a 42 year old New Jersey woman has actually made it her goal t be the world’s fattest woman. She’s even said it would be “a fantasy” to reach 1,000 pounds!

No. A fantasy is stealing Brad Pitt away from Angelina for a night of steamy hot sex. A fantasy is moving to a deserted island with half-naked men fanning you with palm leaves. A fantasy should NOT be holding the world record for World’s Largest Woman, because that translates to poor health and a dramatically shorter life.

There are so many things wrong with this situation. Here are 4:

1. She’s got a daughter
While Simpson actually tries to wolf down enough food to gain another 350 lbs. onto her already obese frame, her three-year-old daughter is still in the picture. Shouldn’t she be less concerned with her goal weight and more concerned with living long enough to see her daughter graduate high school? And the $750 a week eating habit is money that would be better spent on toys, clothes, and outings with her daughter. She might be in the running for a Guinness World Record, but it certainly won’t be for World’s Best Mom. Read More »

Sheyla Hershey, a Brazilian singer, dancer, actress, and model who lives in Texas, was recently awarded the title of having the largest breast implants ever (Size 38 KKK!) by the Brazilian equivalent of the Guinness Book of World Records.

Beyond the obvious, “Are those things bigger than her head?” I was left with so many questions.

WHY????

Why would she even need boobs that big? How does she find clothes that fit? How does she find bras that fit? Can she even close her arms? Can she give someone a hug? How does she sleep? Can she go running, or would that be too dangerous? How does she even stand up without falling over face-first? How did her skin stretch that far? Could someone suffocate in there? Do her boobs get swollen during PMS? Is there an animal/small man trapped inside there? Does she even need to use a table anymore to eat her dinner?

It seems that Sheyla is yet another publicity whore looking for an unconventional way to get famous without actually doing anything worthwhile. She’s appeared on Fox News, The Insider, and, as her website states, “Her career is just taking off and about to soar to heights of majestic proportions.”

Pun intended? We think so.