Hey Dude,

I’ve done the Friends With Benefits thing, and, to say the least, I’m not cut out for it.  Now I have this amazing guy in my life who I consider my best friend, but I’m confused over how I’m supposed to know if he likes me as in a relationship sense or if he just wants to sleep with me.

He texts me quite often, even if just to say hi or to see what I’m up to, or make sure I’m feeling better when I’m sick.  We’ve gone out before with mutual friends and had a blast.  We’re both more of homebodies, so he comes over to my place now regularly and we hang out.  We’ve made out, but I end it before it goes any further because I don’t want the Friends With Benefits thing to happen.

So, how do I know?!

Thanks,
Confused Read More »

Hey Dude,

How the heck do you get out of the friend zone? It seems like everyone thinks it is only a problem for guys but girls go through the same problem as well. I have a guy friend for a few years now and I would love for it to be something more. He is a definition of a player and basically can get whoever he wants. He hooks up with so many girls – he even hooked up with my twin sister last week!

The thing is, we have a good friendship – he makes me laugh and I feel like I can tell him anything. We are very flirty, but then again, he flirts with everyone. We have been in situations where we could of hooked up, but he never made a move. He is not friends with many girls. Honestly, I think I am the closest girlfriend he
has. I just really would love to see if I can turn this into something more. Help!!

-Sick of the Friend Zone Read More »

Boys. What a confusing subject. More confusing than my European History class and Biological Bases of Behavior class combined, and they’re tough enough alone as it is. You think they feel one way and it turns out they feel the exact opposite; sometimes good, other times bad. If they’re were an award on Most Mixed Messages Sent In One Night, boys would definitely take the cake. And the trophy. And then celebrate with a beer bong.

Right now there’s this guy I kind of have a crush on but I have no idea what he’s thinking so I’m not sure what to do. My sorority and his fraternity always have mixers together, and no matter whom our respective dates are we always end up dancing together in the end. At our last function we hooked up and exchanged numbers, but then, thanks to Swine Flu and a class field trip (yeah, we still have those), I couldn’t see him for weeks. We’ve been doin’ a bit of flirxting (that’s text flirting…start using it) but nothing real has happened so far. I know some people think ladies should suck it up and make a move, but I tend to hang out in the guys-always-make-the-first-move corner.

And he’s not making one. Should I?
I’m torn. Read More »

Hey Dude,
Could you clue me into “boy world”? I have been told (thank you He’s Just Not That Into You and pretty much every romance book and movie out there) that the guy needs to do the asking. So we very impatient girls need to give out our numbers and take theirs and then not call them.

This is so, so hard to do. Say you meet a guy and dance, hook up, and talk to him. He seems majorly into you, you exchange numbers and then doesn’t call. Yes, I know that he’s probably just not that into me, but is it really wrong to call or text him? And the three day rule – do guys actually know and abide by it or are all of these things that girls made up?

Thanks so much!
-Danielle Read More »

Got a guy question that’s tearing you up inside? Don’t trust your girl friends to give you honest advice (because they’re afraid if they tell you the truth you will freak out and throw things at them)? Just want to try and understand what a guy is thinking?

We’ve got the dude for you. Send your questions to AskTheDude@CollegeCandy.com and he’ll give it to you straight, whether you want to hear that you’re just a Friend With Benefits or not. Because you can’t throw things at him, no matter what he tells you.

Hey Dude,

OK so this may seem really lame but for some reason guys NEVER sit near me in class. I feel like I’m giving off a bad impression but I really don’t understand. Me and my friends have been analyzing the situation (mostly just cracking jokes about how I look like a big reject) and we can’t figure it out. Not to sound cocky but I’m hot…I have a great rack, long pretty hair, and shower regularly (in case you’re thinking smell is a factor). I just don’t understand it. Do I give off some sort of bitch mannerisms? Is there any way to make me look more approachable when sitting in class? Sorry if this is a really lame question.

–Loser bitch who sits alone in class all the time Read More »

Got a guy question that’s tearing you up inside? Don’t trust your girl friends to give you honest advice (because they’re afraid if they tell you the truth you will freak out and throw things at them)? Just want to try and understand what a guy is thinking?

We’ve got the dude for you. Send your questions to AskTheDude@CollegeCandy.com and he’ll give it to you straight. Because you can’t throw things at him, no matter what he tells you. Our dude is answering questions every Wednesday, so ask away!

Hi Dude,

I have a question that’s been bothering me for a while. I started hooking up with this guy in early February and I’ve done things to him (you know what I mean), but I’ve never slept with him. In April, he started asking me if I’d have sex with him. I said I would, but due to various reasons, it never happened, which was fine with me. About a month ago, he came to visit me (he’s home for the summer and lives 2 hours away). That night, after going down on him, I asked him if he wanted to have sex. He replied, “I can’t, because I really like you.” I was really confused and when I asked him to clarify, he
said that he really respected me and liked me and, therefore, couldn’t do that to me. He also said something about not wanting to ruin things between us. Read More »

The Backstreet Boys said it best: “Quit playin’ games with my heart (with my heart…).” I didn’t quite understand the meaning when I first jammed out to that song back in 1996, but now I get it. And I want to get on top of a mountain and sing that to every guy who has ever effed with me….and the many more that surely will.

What the eff is up with the games? Why do guys do one thing (kiss you) and then confuse the hell out of you (not call)? Why do they play with your head so you can’t do anything but think of them, emotionally eat, then think about them some more?

Why can’t we all just say what we mean and stop making calculated moves? It’s all a big waste of time and I’m sick of it. If you like me, tell me. If you don’t, fine. But don’t purposely not call me because you want me to think about you and then, just when I’m on the brink of being over it, say something cute in a text message.

Guys make me crazy and I needed to know why they feel the need to do so. Apparently, it’s all our fault… Read More »

"Oh, but which one do I choose!?"

Want all o’ yo’ questions answered?! Email Tuffy Luv at TuffyLuv@collegecandy.com to be featured in the Tuffster’s weekly column!!!

Dear Tuffy Luv,
I can’t stop to think about this guy, I hope you can help me and give me some advice. (Sorry for the long e-mail in advance.)

So I met Chuck in school last year, he lives across from my dorm. Since we have the same major and in the same year, we studied for exams together throughout the whole year. At first, I didn’t think I would ever be attracted to him since he is not the type of guy I usually fall for. But I don’t know why, ever since school ended I been thinking about him a lot. Also, during school, my friends keeps telling me that Chuck likes me, and I should give him a chance. And he did act a little weird around me when he was drunk one night and wrote me a little note with hearts. But the thing is I already dropped a lot of hints, and I am not sure if he’s just not that into me or he is just slow and shy.

Chuck lives in a different city, so when school ended, he move back home. Chuck’s friend Steve, however, lives on my street. Since we are the only two people from my school that live in my city, we’ve hung out a couple of times. I can feel that Steve likes me, but I only like him as a friend, and I am not sure if by going to movies with him I am leading him on. One of my friends who works with Chuck said that during one of their convo, Chuck told her that he knows I went to a movie with Steve. Part of me kind of wants him to know, because I want him to be jealous (that’s if he would), but the other part of me was really annoyed by this news, because I feel like he is the type of person who would back out if he knows his friend like me. I haven’t talked to Chuck at all ever since school ended; I sent him a message on FB, but he didn’t reply. Read More »

When I was a freshman I was fortunate to meet my best friends in the world right there in my hall. We were all randomly placed there, but it took no time to realize that fate had put us there together. The 8 of us hit it off immediately and began spending every moment together.

As we went through our 4 years of college and all of the experiences that come with it, we turned to one another for advice, feedback and any information the others might have to shed light on our situation. And yes, to this day, that includes the juicy details of our late-night (or midafternoon!) exploits.

As soon as a guy would leave the room, my best friends and I would gather to dish it all out. Every. last. bit. From the quality of the hookup to the size of his….friend….. we’d let it all out. I knew everything (and I mean everything) that went on between my friends and their boys between the sheets. More than those boys would ever want to know about.

But after a particularly juicy recap recently I started to wonder if guys do the same thing. Do guys sit around and give a play by play (or blow by blow….) of their late night trysts? I know they like to add the notches to their bedposts, but do they share the deets like my friends do? I asked a guy. Here’s the skinny: Read More »

Last week one of the CollegeCandy writers asked a question that I have been thinking about since I started crushing on boys in the 4th grade: would you date someone who weighs less than you?

Many people weighed in (tee hee) on the topic via the comments, and most of them seemed angry that we even brought up the issue. I mean, weight shouldn’t matter! But I really felt that a lot of people were missing the point.

This is not a question of body image or beauty, but rather a question of comfort, societal expectations and the role of men and women in a relationship. I was curious to see if weight was something guys considered when dating someone (beyond the whole preference for a girl with big boobs and a negative waist).

And based on what this guy said, I think weight and size matter more than most people are willing to admit. Read More »