Doesn't get much cheaper than a ghost. Just cut out a hole for easy drinking.

In these hard economic times, I simply cannot justify buying a $115 mermaid costume, no matter how magical I would look come Halloween night. Especially when I have a plethora of items lying around my house, that when properly utilized can be the ultimate Halloween costume.  Here are some cheap and easy homemade costumes that will come in handy during my time of monetary despair.

Static Cling – I can’t count the number of times I’ve walked out of the house with a sock attached to my back. Static cling is the worst, but it’s also the best costume idea when you’re out of ideas and money. Wear an all-white or black outfit and pin socks and other loose articles of clothing to yourself. No muss, no fuss, you’re static cling and you like it.

Be a Real Housewife: The women of Bravo’s hit series “The Real Housewives of ….” have become icons, for better or worse. You may love to hate them, but you’re also going to love dressing up as them. It’s as easy as throwing on a sassy dress and decking yourself out in some serious bling. Top it off with over-sized sunglasses and a super-stuffed bra and you can have your pick of housewife.

Beer Pong: Just grab a red garbage can, cut out the bottom, slap the SOLO label on the side and you’re everyone’s favorite drinking cup. Grab 9 friends and you’ve got yourself a mobile drinking game.

“Cereal Killer” – You can predict that there will be a great deal of Jason’s and Freddy’s running around this Halloween, but put the comedy into serial killers with this original idea. Hot glue miniature cereal boxes to your shirt and stab them with plastic knives. Add some fake blood running from the boxes for the extra effect.

Kate Gosselin – If you can dig up eight baby dolls and somehow fashion your hair into the spiky coif Kate is famous for, you’ll be set to hit the party scene in the hopes of finding a new and improved Jon to help you tend to your Cabbage Patch dolls. Read More »

If starting to plan Halloween costumes mid-July is wrong, then I never want to be right.  I have absolutely no shame in admitting that I get semi-turned on when I see stores start stocking candy corn and Halloween-y (weenie…ha. ha. ha) decorations in September.  It’s the inner child in me.  Unfortunately, it’s time to grow up, and grow up I will do.

Yet, for Halloween, “grow up” doesn’t have to always involve wearing see-through lingerie and animal ears and calling yourself a “Sexy Kitten.”  There’s a difference between “Sexy Kitten” and “Naked Kitten,” something that many girls don’t want to understand.  I’m all for celebrating the one night a year when you can dress seductively in public and nobody can say a word, but I’m also all for those girls who realize they don’t have to look like a total hooker to get into the Halloween spirit.

So if you’re stumped for ideas this year that don’t involve thongs, ass-less chaps, or stripper shoes, here are a few ideas that are sexy but don’t make guys stop and question if you’ll be charging for sex later on:

Hipster: But, let’s be real, Hipsters are not sexy.

Wayne & Garth (Wayne’s World): Ingredients: a brunette and blonde, black t-shirt, trucker hats, glasses, plaid shirt, ripped jeans (all things easily found in a dorm). Imagine how much warmer you’ll be instead of freezing your culo off. Speaking of culo…

Chola: To some, that brown lip liner and drawn-in eyebrows look may be sexy, but since it’s more likely to scare the crap out of people, it’s even more perfect for Halloween.

Risky business broad: Oversize white button-down, socks, wayfarer sunglasses, some booty shorts (or, if you’re willing, tighty-whiteys) and if you want to add a hint of seduction, add a red bra.  A little sexiness won’t kill you…

Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, or that OxyClean Guy: Or anyone else who really stood out in 2009. Octomom? Jon Gosselin? Swine Flu? Lady Gaga? (Though I would avoid her costume with the fireworks boobs…that might get dangerous.) Read More »

Halloween is quickly approaching, which means you need to figure out a costume. Now.

A costume with sex appeal.

While you could go for the classic French Maid or sexy cop (nurse, teacher, tennis pro, grandma…), why not try to wow people with your witty sense of humor instead of your mammary glands? Think about it, if you’re dressed up as a slutty nurse and trying to get your crush drunk, you could easily be mistaken for one of the many slutty nurses at the same party.  And watching Superman drunkenly make out with some other girl while you stand there grasping onto your stethoscope would be tragic!

Don’t get me wrong – we all wanna turn up the sex appeal on Halloween – but there’s nothing sexier than a girl with a sense of humor. Here are a few hilarious Halloween options that will have you standing out at the party for reasons other than your sporadic nipple slips. [Click on the photos for ordering info!] Read More »