Have you ever wanted to know the exact measurement of your guy’s ‘ween, down to the millimeter?

Have you ever overheard two guys bragging about the size of their junk and wish you could help them settle the dispute once and for all?

Well, now you can do both those things.

SizeofaMan.com has just the thing for you and everyone else who just needs to go around measuring penises.

According to it’s designers, the “phallumeasure”, a cylindrical device that reminds me of those beakers I used to pour colored water in during high school science, is “the most accurate way to measure your penis!”

Finally! I was just waiting for the day when I didn’t have to guess, or even worse, lie about my boyfriend’s penis size! I mean, it comes up so often…I was praying that something that could measure something else would be invented! Halleujah! Prayers have been answered!

At $14.95, the “phallumeasure” isn’t expensive, comes with a “final say” guarantee, and claims that it will help stop “cheaters” everywhere, i.e, dudes who find a way to measure their stuff in an inaccurate way. Read More »

Remember when you used to come home from high school, exhausted and starving? Lunch had been at like 10:30 that morning, and so by the time the afternoon bell rang, your stomach was growling so loudly you had to sit hunched over to dull the gurgles.

Home meant snacks. It might refueling yourself for sports or theater club or smoking stolen cigarettes under a tree while sneering at all organized things. Afternoon snack was an event I looked forward to from kindergarten to twelfth grade.

Hell, I still look forward to it!

Sadly, today’s teenage girls aren’t allowing themselves the joy of snack time – or any meal – at all. A report from the UK’s Independent Online showed that over “a third of 13 to 18-year-old girls” polled for a study indicated they had been on a diet or were currently dieting, and “45 per cent [ate] less than 1,200 calories per day”, which is below the healthy amount for growing women.

About a quarter of the boys in the survey admitted to eating less calories than the daily recommended amount, but girls were the ones worrying researchers most of all. Read More »

If you live in Thailand and feel a little embarrassed about buying condoms, just take out a home loan.

Kasikorn Bank recently launched a “condoms for confidence” campaign at around 60 branches in Thailand, hoping free prophylactics will help raise awareness of HIV/AIDS in the “generally conservative” country.

An unidentified bank spokesman explained the thinking behind “condoms for confidence” was the revival of a government awareness campaign that has “fizzled out”, leaving many Thai teenagers in the dark about sexual awareness. Read More »

Hooters? Depressing? You don’t say. All I’ve ever had to do was take a look at the horrible orange and white paint job adorning the outside of most Hooters restaurants to know those places are a bevy of bad taste and depression.

Oh yeah, and fifteen year olds.

In my town, Hooters was the place adolescent boys with fake IDs and too much cologne spent their Friday nights when no one their own age would date them.

Hooters was the place high school’s biggest assholes went to feel superior to women who would never look at them in real life, as well as the place a friend’s friend once tried to work at but quit after some perv threw a popcorn shrimp at her boobs.

In conclusion: Hooters is drenched in grossness. Read More »

I think we’ve had this conversation before. But it’s worth having again, especially since Freshmen year is so crucial to the development of this addiction.

This messy, painful, powerful addiction.

The addiction to wearing pajamas to class.

Some of you had to get up as early as 5:30 AM to get to high school, and while wearing pj’s may have been a slight temptation, you never actually went and did it.

No, you pulled on some jeans, found a shirt somewhere, made sure your face wasn’t frightening, and then hopped into the car while the sun was still coming up.

But then college happens, and for some reason, everything changes. Almost no one has class earlier than 8:30 (a whole hour later than 12th grade), school is usually no more than a 10-15 minute walk from your bed, and breakfast is already made for you. It should be easier to resist the urge to wear those dancing dog pj’s your grandma got you to class…right?

Nope.

Just doing it once, just one taste of the sweet, sweet laziness that is literally throwing a jacket over pajamas is enough to turn some people in pajajay junkies for life (or at least the duration of the college career). Read More »

Justin Timberlake gets around.

He’s done a lot for music, knows how to play the celebrity game, and has even started to gain some acting chops. So sure, the boy’s got talent.

And even if you’re like me, and don’t find JT any hotter than that lanky guy sitting next to you on the subway, it’s easy to see why other people find him attractive. All those years in the limelight have made him a pretty confident fellow, and he almost always shows up in an outfit the works. Timberlake knows how to work that babyface.

And apparently, he works it to get every hot young thing in Hollywood.

Page Six (I know, let’s take a moment to recognize the source) is reporting that JT recently found himself at a club “sitting with a bronze-skinned brunette” and pretending like he had no idea who his girlfriend of a few months, Jessica Biel, was.

A steamy source also whispered that the J-Dawg “is notorious. He will [bleep] anything”. Read More »

Okay, it’s hard enough for me to come to terms with the fact that my senior prom happened a whole FOUR years ago…But now, with recent reports of what upper class high school New Yorkers are getting done for their special night, I officially feel like an old geezer.

Botox.

Yes, the procedure that is usually associated with 50-year-old women who want to eliminate all facial expression muscles in their face in hopes of a smooth forehead or eye area. Supposedly, it is now acceptable for some high schoolers to get this procedure done, according to the New York Post. Read More »