My university is not one of those schools that eagerly works to improve the situation in the dining hall, even though it is overwhelmingly a huge issue on campus.

From day one, I have heard nothing but complaints from my peers, and even my professors – and now, two and a half years later, complaints and concerns of the dining program (created by Sodexho – a program which works with many schools across the nation) still circulate on a day-to-day basis.

As a campus, Hollins students are indisputably guilty for interminable complaining about the issues with Sodexho as a program and the administration taking responsibility (or lack thereof) for student concerns over food issues, but I don’t blame anyone for their incessant pressure on trying to improve the situation. Hollins doesn’t offer a varying meal plan; its unlimited access to the dining hall from breakfast until the cafeteria closes at 7pm binds students to the meal-plan, making getting off the meal plan nearly impossible.

I have seen a huge variety of issues that students have brought up to the public forum: not enough variety in the menu options, foods not being cooked at right temperatures or having a decent amount of heat to them (especially the meat), alike foods such as quesadillas and burgers are in rotation every day (French fries are offered every day, too), no options for vegans except tofu in the salad bar (and very futile options available for vegetarians – especially at a school where vegetarians are a majority), unhealthy options clutter the stations (one night, three types of potatoes were offered: waffle fries, curly fries, and tatter tots), the ingredients on the labels are not present (what about students who have food allergies?), and most of the time, labels are not even put out near a station.

These are just the minimal grumbles that have been brought up over and over again within the student body, and no one from the administration or the manager of the dining hall ever really gives a solid answer on how to fix the program. The few times promises are made to make a change in the dining hall, nothing ever happens.

Many students have tried to jump start programs. For example, last year some students started a petition to get cage-free eggs instead of regular eggs on campus. I believe nearly 500 students signed it (in a school of 800), but the petition was ignored. How can 500 students be ignored? Students tried starting a food committee, but that didn’t last for long – no one seemed interested in taking on the responsibility, especially when everyone knows that the administration has no interest in really making changes. The Health Department has even been called before, and that wasn’t enough to jump start any movement. Honestly, I think students feel like nothing can be done – especially since everyone on campus knows that a contract was signed between Hollins and Sodexho a few years ago, making the partnership inevitable. The contract seems more important than the well-being of the students, at this point.

Although many point to Sodexho, I do not think all the blame can fall on the national food company. Many other universities use Sodexho, but they have no qualms about what their students are being served and neither do the students. The plan Hollins picked is not pleasing students, at all, and that needs to be addressed by those who have the power. Hello administration, are you listening yet? It seems like the only people who could do something are the administration, but I don’t think they care. After all, they don’t have to eat there night after night.

While the rest of the students have numerous complaints, I specifically have two:

My friend’s mothers who went here talk with smiles on their face about the food. They absolutely loved it, and it seems like it was such a coveted memory of long meals with their friends eating some good meals. Now, students rush to eat what they can (if anything, especially on weekends) and then compare food poisoning stories with their friends. In honor of our amazing alumni that Hollins toots so often, why not fix something that was so popular? Also, I think it is ironic how the food improves drastically whenever alumni, Board of Trustee members, or prospective students visit campus. Fondue and prime rib was served during Parents Weekend once, and I have to say, I haven’t seen either one since.

Whether or not it seems like it, food is a huge part of college life. If you live on campus, you eat there like it’s your home. No one should fret about whether or not they will have adequate options for dinner or if they will get sick from the Ranch Dressing that tasted more like spoiled milk.  While my fellow peers have said enough is enough over and over again, I think change will not come until the administration does something. And based on the way the administration has handled things in the past, I don’t see that happening any time soon.

Now, tell me about your dining hall. Do you love it or hate it? Does it stand out from other schools across the nation? Do you think the administration at your university is conscious of the food that its students consume on a daily basis? I want to know what (kind of crap) you are getting fed by both the dining hall and the administration.

I made a mistake with where I chose to attend college. I take full accountability in admitting that I should not be where I am today, but here I am in my pink palace of a dorm room, hoping that some cosmic force stronger than my own folly has kept me here. Although my series usually focuses on the negative experiences at my university, in hopes to help others from making the same mistake as me (which actually doesn’t mean anyone should change their mind about coming to Hollins, it means anything that has happened to me here can happen at any college across the globe), I have decided in lieu of Valentine’s Day, I would share what I love about my college experience in the last two and a half years.

Academics: This is what college is all about, and in my opinion, it is learning what you want to learn (which is something I have experienced here more than not). When looking at other colleges across the nation to transfer to, I couldn’t find courses that enthralled me the way the course catalogue on my shelf does. Just like any college, I have taken a few dud classes (some have been general requirements, but that is expected), but for the most part, I have nothing to say besides exceptional reviews of all my classes. And what more can I ask for since I am here to get my degree? Anyone who is looking to transfer from their college seriously needs to consider the transition of academic life from school to school, because, at the end of the day, you are here (and you are paying mucho bucks!) to discover what is out there in the word of academia.

Friendship: During one of the first days of orientation I met my best friends. These girls are my family at a school that lacks the sisterhood it sells in glossy view books. Friendship is a huge aspect of college life, because I don’t think anyone could go through 4 years alone, especially at such a small college like Hollins. They are my partners in crime, my amusement on Friday nights, my choir when we are the only juniors singing in celebration to our senior class, but, most of all, they are my sisters. No one should ever stay strictly for the friends they have made, but in judging the friendships you have, it absolutely should be a factor. While I know I could make friends anywhere else, I could not call anyone else a sister (who I am not related to) the way I can with them.

Traditions: Hollins has outstanding traditions. What other college in the nation hikes up a mountain after the first frost of fall in October after eating Krispy Kreme donuts at 6am for Tinker Day? I don’t know of any other school, even those rich in tradition, that have the same spirit and zealous positivity behind them. I love to celebrate – anything and everything, whenever a celebration is called for – so being able to celebrate at Hollins really appealed to me. Although a lot of the traditions have been ruined for me (you will hear about that in a later article), I respect and honor all traditions through and through because of what they mean to the history of this school. Leaving, I would have had to learn new traditions and I wouldn’t have been there from the start to participate – and participation has helped me make them my own.

Opportunities: Every college has a lot to offer its students, some more than others. I think if you are willing to call yourself persistent and work hard to get what you want, anything you want can come your way. Through opportunities at Hollins, I was able to be the chair of the activity board’s General Speakers Bureau – an utterly life changing, invaluable experience. It allowed me to not only learn about event planning, but I was able to host some amazing modern day influences (especially transgendered author and playwright who moved the audience to tears, Kate Bornstein). While that is only one example of an opportunity I worked hard for and succeeded at, I have had many more. Despite all the hardships I have had on this campus, I have been able to make this campus my own.

And, of course, there are little things about this campus I love like the custodian, Vince, who knows my name, smiles, and always says hi – even though I have never personally met him. I love the History Department Party at the end of each semester that allows my friends and me to go crazy while dancing to old school rock. I love my peers who work so hard to do what means something to them, always changing and making a difference on campus and off. I love my professors that know me for who I am and have supported me through whatever I have needed. I love the way the trees bend, the loop winds along the rolling hills, and the grass grows so green. I love the way I imagine this place in the 60s, the 30s, and even the late 1800s. I really do love it, despite everything.

However, people ask me why I haven’t left, or why I am still here after two years of nonstop insanity and all I really have to say is that while I openly admit staying here is a mistake, being here – at this point in time – is the right thing for me. People have a love/hate relationship with everything from the red nail polish on their finger nails to their parents, and the relationship I have with Hollins is exactly that. The things that I love are something I will carry with me forever, while the things I hate are just obstacles in my everyday life, which have helped me become stronger as a student, a woman, and as an advocate for others and myself.

Now tell me, what makes you stay where you are. What makes you smile on your campus? Even if you hate your dorm room, your roommate, your classes, and the cold this winter – what on your campus makes you get out of bed every day? Is it your friends or the cafeteria food? Or is it the Professor who blesses you as class is letting out, or the spiral staircase in the main student building?

Tell me what you love about your college, no matter what your feelings about it are.

I will never forget moving into my dorm during my first year orientation week being completely scared out of my mind. However, at Hollins, meeting people came easy. In fact, we were put into groups of six or seven students with a student advisor, who was a grade or two older than us, to spend the week with. We played ice-breaker games, talked about high school, and spent the days getting to know each other in the August heat. My student advisor, known as a Student Success Leader (SSL), was a quiet sophomore, English major (just like me). She helped my fellow group members put together our schedules, get to our seminars on time, and learn all about Hollins and its academics.

Although orientation went quickly, I never forgot how amazing my SSL was. She went out of her way to stay in contact with all of us first years, even leaving us goodie bags of finger puppets and Hello Kitty stickers. She always made herself available, and I couldn’t have thanked her more.

At the end of my first year, applications for the new program called Orientation Leaders were released. The application was simple, asking for information on my campus activities, my schedule, and ideas about community building. I then signed up for an interview with two or three other girls. During the interview, the Dean of Students asked questions to the other girls, snubbing me from the conversation.

Dean of Students, Patty O’Toole, and I have gone way back since the very beginning of my academic career at Hollins. She came to Hollins my first year, and I remember her telling my mom how excited she was to be at Hollins and to help all the students during a Parents event at Orientation. When she started to ignore me from the conversation, I knew immediately that I would be rejected from being an O-Team participant because of our run-ins in the past. And my gut instinct ended up being correct!

While other girls found out they made the O-Team program, I received nothing in my e-mail or through the mail. I was told that I would receive a message regardless if I made it or not, but I didn’t get anything. Everyone who applied for O-Team made it (or at least that I knew of, and keep in mind – Hollins is so small, word travels fast), except my friends and me. I didn’t understand why I would be passed upon. Here I was – an eager student ready to I repay the favor of my student advisor the year before with no Honor Court violations, and an active participant in my community – being turned down.

Obviously, since the Dean was responsible for handling (and fumbling through) many issues I had at the school, it was apparent that she kept me off so I wouldn’t share my story with the first years. Better to keep me away from them so as not to ruin the Hollins image. In fact, whenever Hollins and its image of being this sanctuary of sisterly love comes into perspective for what it really is, I have found that the university will do nearly anything to try and keep their image clean, even if they have to hide things and lie through their teeth to do so.

When my mom and I met with the President, we brought this up at as well. After reviewing my credentials with President Gray, she seemed to think it was a little strange that I wasn’t put on O-Team. Home for the summer, about a month after meeting with the President, I received a phone call from the Dean asking me if I was willing to put our differences aside to work as a team during orientation. If I was asked questions about being an O-Team leader to begin with, maybe the Dean would have known why (besides looking at my application) being a part of freshman orientation was important for me.

Although this story ended up having a somewhat happy ending – I got to participate as an O-Team leader and thoroughly enjoyed the orientation process – it was a hassle to go through. All of these unnecessary steps could have been prevented from the get-go. No one should have to go to the President for something as simple as being rightfully placed on a leadership team.

I may strongly dislike Hollins, but it doesn’t mean I have nothing positive to share or give. In fact, after all the things I experienced first year, I came back and became one of the most involved students on campus. I sat on the Student Life council, I was the Guest Speakers Bureau chair for the Activity Board and brought four amazing speakers to campus, and I was an active member in the Feminist Majority Leadership Alliance. With those activities as part of my schedule, there was no reason to ignore me for a role as an O-Team leader. The Dean made a subjective decision, which was unprofessional and wrong when looking at the facts of what kind of student I am.

Just because I can’t stand the university, doesn’t mean I am unable of participating as a contributing community member. No one, not even the administration, is going to hold me back from being a part of the community. I refuse to let them because Hollins is my community too, even if the administration and the bulk of students like to make it feel as if it’s not.

As I danced through (and let me say, there was a lot of dancing on the weekends) my spring semester of freshman year, everything came to a screeching halt when I returned from class one day with the word bitch written in big letters across my whiteboard. My first intention was that my friends did it as a joke – no big deal. But when I asked them about it, they had no idea what I was talking about.

And then it happened again. And again. And nearly every time I left my room. It turned into this monotonous cycle, where bitch turned into other words, and when I say ‘other’ words I am talking about every negative synonym under the sun. Then messages were left letting me know that I was disliked, “hated” in fact, around campus. My door decorations disappeared or were ripped up. My name was even blacked out on the community bulletin board for my hall. Eventually, my whiteboard disappeared into the grungy abyss of my neon green hallway. Every time I shut my door or pretty much blinked, I had to prepare myself with what would be there next.

As it happened, over and over again, I reported it. Each and every time. I had no idea who would spend so much time doing something so crude over and over again. The first few times were laughable, but then the consistency of the messages and removal of my property alarmed me. I felt like I was being watched. So, I talked with my hall RA and the head RA of the building, and then I followed up the line with the Area Coordinator of Housing and Residence Life on campus, the Dean of Students, and Campus Safety. Everyone told me that I was being too paranoid, that it was just a prank, because no one could actually be that mean on campus.

This all started in January, but the worst of it came in April of 2007. Returning back to my hall after a party in my best friend’s room, there was a trail of banana’s coming from my door. Walking closer, I realized that not only were banana pieces placed outside my door, but they were smeared on the bottom of the door, and they coated my door knob. Anyone who knows me knows that banana’s make me sick. The smell of bananas immediately makes my stomach turn, and within seconds of standing at my door, I threw up.

Running to get an available RA, I brought her to the witness the disgusting display of the yellow fruit. After opening my door, we realized that someone actually slid banana pieces through the crack of my door, so that the smell would get into my room. Expecting the RA to help the situation, she instead, stood there with her boyfriend and told me to clean it up – despite seeing how sick it was making me. She didn’t even help besides glaring at me. I could not believe what was going on, so I started taking pictures of the banana’s to send to my parents and the administration. Telling me to stop taking pictures, the RA snapped and told me that I needed to stop being so ridiculous because they were just banana’s. Cleaning up the mess, I continued to gag and get sick without any help from her.

Immediately, I reported it to EVERYONE that I thought should be informed in a higher position on campus. Monday morning, I received a knock at my door by the Area Coordinator. “I got your e-mail this weekend, where are the banana’s you said were smeared on your door?” Looking at her, I could not believe she would have actually thought I would have let the bananas fester in the hall for an entire weekend. When I told her I cleaned them up, she skeptically looked at me like I made up the story as a piece of fiction.

Later that day, I had a meeting with the Dean and the head of Housing. They told me that they didn’t know why I was so worked up over the incident. To them, it was just a prank. By this time, I had 14 documented accounts of vandalism and messages left on my whiteboard – yet it was still a prank for someone to take time out of their life to personally affect me? It didn’t make sense to me as they told me this, and it doesn’t make sense to me today.

The more I fussed about the situation, the more they pointed the finger at me. The administration told me they thought my friends did it – even though I was with them all night. They told me that no one would do that at our university. They pulled out their favorite card: “What did you do to deserve this? What did you do to make someone want to put bananas on your door?”

Although I told the administration I felt like I was being harassed and bullied, they told me to basically shut up and let it go because in their eyes, I wasn’t being treated any differently on campus. Right, because everyone has bananas and the word bitch smeared all over their door day after day? They said they couldn’t do anything. However, they chose not to do anything. Any reputable college would work with a student to make them feel safe on campus, especially to prevent such attack again (the banana episode sadly wasn’t the last thing to happen to me).

My school did not.

If you know of someone bullying someone else or harassing them, even in subtle ways like writing nasty comments on their whiteboard, you as a student have a responsibility to speak up. I am sure that someone on my hall saw someone write a message or put the bananas out, but they didn’t object or question the situation.

It’s not right for a student to fear opening their door or being alone on campus, especially when the administration is hush hush about the situation in the first place. What I found to be important with this issue was speaking up. Telling as many students as I could about it, so they knew that such incidents actually happened on campus. Even on a small campus, such as Hollins. Students have the right to know what’s going on – whether it is the administration ignoring another student or what happens in their dorm buildings on a Friday night.