It’s back-to-school time, and I’ve been spending some time lately thinking about what college means for our sex lives. College is our time to explore anything that interests us to find out what we really like and what type of people we want to become. We explore different majors, career paths, friendships, relationships, and sexualities. College is the first time in our lives most of us can really embrace our sexuality, explore it, and figure out how to truly enjoy it.

I go to a women’s college, so my first year was filled with questions from friends back home asking if I’d become a lesbian. My answer: so what if I had? And why did they care?

Despite the freedom we gain in college from adults, we are still constrained by our peers’ expectations of us, which can make it difficult to remain true to ourselves and create a healthy personal (and sexual) identity.

Here are some tips I hope you girls (and guys) can keep in mind while exploring sex in college. Read More »

I wish I were gay.

Well, no. That’s only a little bit true. That’s actually barely true at all. I don’t want to be saddled with unfair prejudice in the workplace, social and religious spheres, and military. So let me refine that statement a bit.

I wish I could be into dudes.

Not quite the same thing, really. I’ve always been a fan of the Kinsey scale when it comes to human sexuality, since “gay” and “straight” are so painfully restrictive. So let’s just say I wish I could ding my rating up a few points or two.

I’m perfectly happy with women, of course. Ladies, you guys are great, and I mean that. It’s not like I’m not getting enough variety in my sexy diet or anything. And honestly, friendship-wise, I tend to be one of those wimpy boys that has more female than male friends and always gets called “a really nice guy”. So what’s up, man?

Why the thirst for testosterone?

It’s a matter of principle. See, I’ve always believed that gender expression is mostly socialized. Girls get dolls, boys get dump trucks, that sort of thing. Switch them around and little girls would grow up to be seven feet tall with full Thoreau neck beards – no kidding, man. And from a very young age, us dudes have basically been told: “Hey! Check it out! Boobs!” Read More »

I am sad to announce that legendary fashion designer Yves Saint Laurent passed away in Paris on Sunday at the age of 71. He is best known for redesigning “men’s clothes” for women through creations such as his infamous tux of 1966 and trademark elegant pantsuit. As one commentator put it, “Chanel gave women freedom” in the first half of the 20th century, and Saint Laurent “gave them power”.

In Other News,

Hilary Clinton emerged triumphant from Sunday’s primary in Puerto Rico yet it is doubtful that this will be enough to stop her downhill spiral. On Tuesday, the remaining 31 delegates will be decided as voters in Montana and South Dakota go to the polls for the Democratic Party’s final two primaries. Obama is approximately 50 delegates away from the 2,118 needed to secure the party’s nomination. Read More »

The College Candy Movie Review showcases three newly released Movies and/or DVDs—one for each of our three classifications: “Best Date Movie”, “If You Must…” “Best Movie Ever! Go Watch/Rent It NOW!”

Best Date Movie (on DVD)

Cloverfield released 01/18/2008

A going away party abruptly ends when a monster launches an attack on New York City. The movie is told from the perspective of character Hudd’s video camera (think Blair Witch Project) as he and his friends try to escape the monster’s wrath.

No doubt you’ve heard of this movie already—it made massive waves when it hit theaters in January—but perhaps you didn’t realize it’s full potential as a date movie. For starters, watching it as a DVD means that most likely it’ll be just you and your date curled up in front of the screen, in which case a bit of suspense and thrill are definitely pluses. Also, Sci-fi flicks always make great icebreakers—there’s something inherently goofy about the plot no matter how freaky it may be.

In case you really get into it, the DVD also boasts several bonus featurettes, four deleted endings, as well as two alternative endings. Read More »

Many women see their backdoor as a one-way street, so to speak. To them, anal sex is more laughable than sexy and it’s understandable that they should feel that way–after all, what has popular culture told us about anal sex? That it’s funny, disgusting, painful, or the dangerous means of a deviant lifestyle.

I will concede that anal sex is funny at times, but only so much as sex as a whole is funny (which it really should be). Also, we as a society seem to need to make light of the things that make us uncomfortable, and anal sex is still very taboo culturally because of widespread misinformation and closed minds.

For instance, many people still associate anal sex with homosexuality and the AIDS epidemic, and let their ignorance about the lifestyle inform their ideas about the nature of the act. Granted, some studies have shown that sexually transmitted diseases are more easily spread through anal sex, but they are even more easily preventable if the sex is practiced safely.

For all its perceived perversion, anal sex seems to be growing in popularity. In a 2005 study by the Center for Disease Control, they found that 34% of men and 32% of women between the ages of 22-24 have anal sex with the opposite sex, up from 20% in 1990. The Guide to Getting it On also reports that 30-40% of all heterosexual couples in this country have tried anal intercourse, with up to half of these continuing to do it on an occasional basis. Read More »

I have to admit that I usually know what to expect from Nip/Tuck:

a) a crazy, graphic display of plastic surgery

b) kinky sex

c) Dr. Troy being a creepy and naked

d) Dr. Troy having kinky sex, and of course

e) that one moment in the show where I’m like, “holy sh%$ that is messed up!”

But last night’s episode caught me totally off guard when it became quite obvious that Julia, MacNamara’s ex wife, was playing for “the other team.” Huh? And with the hot and beautiful girlfriend of Ellen Degeneres, Portia de Rossi, no less! I seriously never saw this one coming. I mean, think about it: Julia had been married to a hot plastic surgeon for years, she’s a mom and she’s even sexed it up kinky style with Troy a few times. Is this not hetero behavior?

Yet when Julia went to LA to introduce/explain her current lady love affair to the boys, she didn’t come out and say, yeah I’ve been into chicks all of this time. She explained to MacNamara that it was all about the “connection” and the fact that the communication and sex were easier.

Hmmm … First I thought, how in god’s name is the sex easier? But then, I began to wonder, is sexual preference really about the connection? Can the actual person, despite gender really be what seals the deal? Read More »

I decided to get out of town for the weekend. You know, head to the country where my cell phone doesn’t get service, my computer doesn’t get internet and my hair doesn’t get…clean.

And, obviously, on this particular weekend huge things happened in the world of pop culture and entertainment, which leave me with hundreds of emails and tons of voicemails upon my return. Note: hair extremely greasy.

Um. Dumbledore is gay!?

What? How on earth did I miss that? I mean, really; how the hell did I miss that?

I have read every single Harry Potter book…3 times.

I majored in English in college, meaning I learned the art of reading between the lines in all sorts of texts.

I am a total fag-hag and love (absolutely adore) gay men.

If anyone should have seen that one coming it would have been me.

I am not saying that I am some genius (though, if you would like to think of me as one I am more than happy to agree), but I am saying that I am always on the lookout for interesting sub-plots and the meaning behind everything an author writes. Especially when it involves fabulous and powerful gay men.

So, if JK had indeed intended Dumbledore to be gay from the beginning, I would have seen it. And I did not. There was no pink décor in Dumbledore’s office. There were no saucy memories of late nights in Hogsmeade’s most hoppin’ gay bars floating around the Penseive. There wasn’t even an inkling of interest between Dumbles (as I like to call him) and Cedric Diggory, and how could any gay man not fall for that boy’s eyes, not to mention his skills on the Quiddich pitch? Read More »

Today, being gay is not such a taboo. But in the utopian Christian world, being gay is still unacceptable.

As a former bible toting, God-loving Christian, I can easily say that converts are whole-heartedly welcomed and celebrated in the church. But now, there is another type of conversion, a conversion from “straight” to gay to “straight” again that is also being welcomed and accepted.

This “conversion therapy” is really behavior modification or simply put, brainwashing.

From the article on ABC News, it sounds much like the movie So You Want to Be a Cheerleader except in real life (and maybe slightly less creepy…remember those outfits??). Making someone participate in so-called straight male activities like football banter with the guys or automobile maintenance aren’t any way to change their inherent attraction to one sex or another.

James Serra attended Love In Action, the largest gay “rehab” located in Tennessee. He spent THREE YEARS in the program and is now a counselor.

Serra said that he sees homosexuality as a behavior, a choice. Although he is still attracted to men, he has not acted on his feelings for eight years. He hasn’t been with a woman either.

I hate to break it to this guy, but that isn’t conversion, that’s a really long sex drought. Read More »

Bill O’Reilly is either A) slightly insane or B) obsessed with saying things in front of a camera to get a reaction or C) both.

Last week, O’Reilly, with the help of “Fox crime analyst” Rod Wheeler, unearthed a supposed growing trend of Lesbian gangs who are apparently attacking men and sexually molesting young girls all over the United States.

“It’s a national underground network, if you will, Bill” Wheeler explained to the No Spin host, “of women who are lesbians.” Read More »

When someone tells me they’re gay, I don’t doubt it’s something they’ve always been. Knowing enough people who tell their coming-out stories with pain in their eyes, or recall their childhood with a mixture of sadness and confusion, I am convinced, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that homosexuality is not a choice. It’s something you’re born into. Something you are.

Alan Chambers doesn’t agree with me.

Chambers is the president of Exodus International, “an umbrella organization that oversees hundreds of conservative Christian-based ministries all over world” which support the ex-gay movement. You heard right. Rehabilitation centers and programs are popping up all over the globe to help men and women become “un-gay”. Read More »