Question:
So I know that the year is nearly over but I thought I’d send this question anyway. I’m a sophomore and I had an awesome freshman year. I met a bunch of people, I had friends on my hall and it seemed like there was always something to do. And now it’s just not the same. My friends are spread all over campus, my classes are harder and it feels like I’m stuck in the middle: I’m too old to go to frat parties but I’m clearly not old enough to go to the bar. This year just isn’t fun. Is this just me? Do you guys know how to fix this?

GPA Girl:
I believe this is commonly known as the “sophomore slump,” girl. And I don’t want to judge, but it sounds as if your sophomore year isn’t turning out to be so great because you are determined to believe that it’s not as good as last year. I think you need to stop comparing and start considering things differently. The trick is to focus on what’s good and, if possible, to manufacture your own fun. 

Throw a party in your dorm or reserve a lounge to gather all your friends together. You could easily do this once a week, even if it’s just meeting for coffee or studying in a group at the library. If you want to see your friends more, there’s no one stopping you. You also said your classes are harder this year. Well, I know this is a pretty typical “GPA Girl” thing to say, but… didn’t you come to college to learn? If your classes are easy for you, you’re probably not learning much. If you can’t seem to understand anything, though, just drop by your profs’ office hours. People want to help you! Finally, remember that not every party on campus is a frat party, and you don’t have to hit up the bar to have a great time–throw your own party, or find an under-21 hang-out spot that you and your friends love. You really do have to take matters into your own hands. If things are tough for you right now, make them easier! No one is going to do it for you.

Busy Bee:
Sometimes, we have to face the fact that not all things can be as great as they once were. I’m not surprised your freshman year was more fun – it should be, given the fact that it was your first year in college. Many people often feel this way their sophomore year. I’m not sure if there’s a real quick fix, except to just tough it out. There’s only a few more months left in the semester, and the best you can do is to just keep at it until summer arrives. Instead of focusing on your social life, why not try excelling in your tough classes or working on some of your personal goals? School is not always fun, but it’s what you make of it. Also, if you barely see your friends anymore, maybe they’re not really your friends (no offense!). Try making some new ones or joining a club – the bond you create from a shared interest usually creates longer lasting friendships. I say, just try to get through this semester the best you can. As for your partying dilemma, I’ll leave it to our Party Girl!

Party Girl:
Whoa, whoa, whoa – did you just say “too old to go to frat parties”??? Honey, if you’re still going to college, you’re never too old to go to frat parties. Frats are there to serve the needs of the university population who are still too young to go to the bar. I think you’ve hit the “sophomore slump.” I had a similar experience during my sophomore year. Then I realized that my friends were closer than I thought and a house party gets you just as drunk as the bar (possibly even more drunk…it’s so cheap!). Your campus can’t be so large that a simple 20 minute walk wouldn’t get you to a friend’s place. You have so many options! When you finally turn 21, you’ll look at your bank account and start fondly remembering the days of house parties when a cup was $5 and you were encouraged to do keg stands. Seriously – cherish this time. House parties, frat parties, sneaking flasks into the movie theater – all of these are cheap, accessible options to drink underage with your buddies. Grab a friend and take your pick!

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During these warm months, there’s no Public Safety vehicle to worry about, no possibility of getting caught with a cocktail in your dorm room, and no cute guy across the hall to worry about when you wake up the next morning looking and feeling like hell. These summer perks have their downsides, however. Downsides! You say, downsides to complete freedom? Come on, as if! (I’ve decided your inner thoughts sound a lot like Cher in Clueless)

But really, ladies, there are a few things that can put a damper on a sizzling good time. That’s why Summer Do’s and Don’ts is back, freshly coated in SPF 15 and fake tanner, to bring you Summer Do’s and Don’ts: Summer Parties.

Do make sure you know the place and the person who’s throwing this shindig. House parties are much more frequent now, and the amount of people you’ve met in college combined with the amount of people your friends have met usually means you will find yourself at a place that is the very opposite of familiar to you. If you’re going to a friend of a friend’s house or apartment, find out their name and the address of the place. Get your own directions, even if you’re going with people. Be self sufficient and prepared.

Do bring your cell phone. I don’t care if you’d rather not be carrying a purse all night, a cell phone is a must at any and all parties. Especially those parties that take place in the woods or at a stranger’s house.

Don’t put your cell in your back pocket. Phone + back pocket + being tipsy + going pee = phone in the toilet. I’ve lost 2 phones this way (yet never admitted to Verizon why it looks as though the phone has been dunked in water). Learn from my mistake.

Do make your own drink and keep it in your grasp all night. House parties usually mean homemade concoctions, and whether or not you paid a cover, you want to make sure the drink maker isn’t being too stingy—or too generous—with the liquor. No one wants to be that girl Who Got So Wasted She Danced In The Backyard Half Naked, and drinking too much too fast will get you there, or worse. Plus, people can be desperate and creepy. If you take control of your alcohol intake, there’s no way someone can mess with you.

Don’t drink too much. I know, I know, I sound like your mother, but honestly, getting obliterated is never a good way to spend an evening. You act stupid, you sound stupid, and every loser guy within five feet knows what a drunk girl looks like. We could all use a little liquid energy or courage now and then, but getting blasted just plain spells trouble.

Do go with friends—and leave with them. A lot of times, we’ll find our soulmate (or at least soulmate for the night) at these parties, and the temptation to ditch our friends for him or her can be high. Don’t do it! Not only will your friends be annoyed, but a stranger is not always the best person to depend on.

Don’t stay at a party that seems shady. Feel like the cops might show up? Leave. Chances are, those gut feelings are right, and we all know what it feels like to hear the dreaded “Shit! Police!” If you feel weird, just leave quietly. Going home a little early sure beats running through the woods, dodging flashlights and branches like you’re on Law and Order.

Do use the time to meet different people. This isn’t college. No one’s going to be talking about who you talked to or who you smiled at the next day. Have fun, branch out. Talk to that slightly nerdy guy in the corner with the cute smile. If he turns out to be a mouth breather with a horrible sense of humor, you won’t have to see him ever again!

Lastly, and oh so importantly, Don’t drive drunk. Even if you’ve only had a beer or two, and feel fine, don’t get behind the wheel. Call a friend, call your parents, call a taxi, just don’t drive. You might not kill anyone or get into an accident, but getting stopped by the cops and being charged with a DUI sucks. Just ask Lindsay.